


Part Two: Reciprocation

by satanchangedmypresets



Series: Savior [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Gen, M/M, Slash, Smut, Work In Progress, mate, wing!imprinting, wing!kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-06
Updated: 2012-10-09
Packaged: 2017-11-15 17:38:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 66,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/529883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satanchangedmypresets/pseuds/satanchangedmypresets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Castiel explore their new relationship without the threat of death, and Sam discovers a new attraction for the archangel, Gabriel. However, Gabriel carries a secret that will put Sam directly in the line of fire. A new enemy reveals itself while an old enemy seems to have switched sides once more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Take Me Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam brings an injured Gabriel back to the motel.

_All his life, angels and demons had burned him out of house and home and chased him halfway around the world but it wasn’t hard to rebuild in a new place with a new name. Especially now with all that he had ready at his hand to do his bidding. When he wanted time away from it all, no one asked him where he was going or why. Most were too afraid anyway._

_Tonight, however, was a very morose night. So much so that he didn’t want to spend it in Hell nor in the arms of his lover who was usually so good at chasing away those pesky memories. Tonight…tonight he wanted to be alone._

_Tonight he wanted to stand in the hall of mirrors without a stitch of clothing on his body and stretch his stunted wings until they hurt and try to stretch them still more. He stretched them until the agony of doing so tore through him and he fell to his knees, panting as he drew them back to himself. They shuddered from disuse and he glared at them, disgusted at the stark reminder of what he was._

_As if they’d ever be the breadth of a true angel._

* * *

It was reckless, coming here, and Gabriel knew that even as he stood on the edge of the abyss looking down. Hell raged around him, but try as they might, the demons couldn’t touch him. Even a fallen archangel was an archangel with whom one should not trifle. So they shied away from his grace even as he paid them no mind. The Cage rattled at his feet and Gabriel almost faltered, his step shaken.

Lucifer was silent but Gabriel knew that he was looking up at him. The feeling he got was almost remorse, regret for killing him, and Gabriel thought it was funny that Lucifer was the only one of his brothers he still felt anything for.

Michael…Michael was far more demanding as only the firstborn son could be.

“Brother, give me your hand. Give me your hand so that I may climb out of here and restore Heaven to its proper place.”

Gabriel almost did, almost…but he managed to stop himself and pull back. The need to obey was so strong, even after all these years, but he shook his head.

“Brother, give me your hand.” Michael snapped, his patience gone, and Lucifer laughed beside him.

Gabriel wavered then took another step back, shaking his head one more time.

“GABRIEL!”

“Sorry, bro,” Gabriel laughed, almost giddy with relief of being able to say what he wanted, to say what he’d wanted to say for _centuries_. “But this…this is how it’s got to be.”

Michael’s eyes widened and Lucifer’s laughter rose in volume, echoing through the cage and through Hell itself. Demons poured into the space between them, attacking in force, and Gabriel turned and ran, laughing even as he clawed his way out.

It took him years to force his way back out of Hell and when he finally got back to Earth, he was exhausted. His wings shuddered weakly and he was dimly aware of the damage done to his vessel. He’d have to tend to it later, now he needed to find Castiel. He had a growing suspicion about his little brother that was going to rock the world’s socks if it were true.

_Gabriel…_

It wasn’t a prayer exactly but someone was calling his name. With the last of his strength, Gabriel sought out the man, coming to rest invisible in a field somewhere in west Kentucky. He stared, awestruck, at Sam Winchester stretched out over the hood of the Impala, hand furiously at work between his legs.

Gabriel couldn’t help but slide closer, drawn by the wanton look of lust and want on the youngest Winchester’s face. He wanted to touch but for some reason, he didn’t dare. Instead, he extended his wings slightly, letting the tips brush over Sam’s bare skin. Sam’s reaction was instant, coming hard with the archangel’s name on his lips. Gabriel smiled, oddly proud and brimming with the new information the sight afforded him.

He swayed and struggled to focus long enough to fade into the corporeal world but didn’t managed it until well after Sam had cleaned himself up and was almost half-asleep. Damn, he wouldn’t get quite the affect he wanted but the look of shock and horror on Sam’s face was funny enough.

Gabriel grinned wolfishly, even through the blood and tears. “Hey there, Sammy,”

The realization that he was falling came as more of a surprise to him than finding Sam jerking off to him on the hood of the Impala.

Sam leapt from the car, bounding to Gabriel’s side, sliding to his knees to catch the archangel before he hit the ground.

“What happened to you?!” Sam cried, cradling him gently and taking in the ragged mess that was the angel’s body.

“Hell,” Gabriel laughed weakly. “I stupidly went after visiting hours were over.”

“You’ve been gone for months!”

Gabriel nodded, using Sam’s shoulders to pull himself up to at least a sitting position. It made his head swim and Sam slid closer to him, letting him use the hunter’s chest for support.

“Yeah, and three months up top is thirty years downstairs. I had to fight my way back out but…it was worth it.”

Sam shook his head, unable to believe that Gabriel would risk himself so foolishly. “What were you doing?”

Gabriel smiled weakly, his eyes fluttering as he fought to stay semi-conscious. “Saying good-bye to my brothers.”

Sam gave a wordless sound of protest when the archangel went still, his head falling against Sam’s chest and Sam worriedly brushed through Gabriel’s matted hair, each strand tangled with dried blood. After a moment, he nodded to himself.

“Okay.”

He straightened up, cradling Gabriel against his chest and carried him to the Impala, somehow managing the backdoor open and carefully laying the archangel over the backseat. Gabriel didn’t move or even acknowledge that he was being moved so Sam closed the door and paused outside the driver’s side door.

“Dear Castiel…Cas, I’m on my way back. I found Gabriel…or he found me…and he’s hurt. Please…”

Sam paused, not even sure what he should ask for. He just looked at the broken angel in his back seat and there was nothing in him that wanted anything more than for Gabriel to just be well again.

Then he was turning the Impala, spinning the tires in the soft dirt as he headed back to the road. On gravel the car leapt forward, eating up the road between them and the motel.

* * *

Castiel sat up when he heard Sam’s prayer and Dean, lying across his chest recovering from his fourth orgasm, gave a tired sound of protest. He gave another when Castiel snapped his fingers to dress them both.

“Hey…”

“Sam is returning with Gabriel. Gabriel has been injured and I must care for him.”

Castiel was already on his feet, stripping the bed Dean wasn’t lying on and draping the towels from the bathroom across it.

“Dean, please run some hot water.”

Dean got up groggily, trying to shake himself awake. “Can’t you just heal him?”

Castiel gave him a look of resolute patience and Dean found that he once more amazed that Cas even put up with him, let alone loved him.

“I am far more concerned with the state that Gabriel is in rather than his vessel. I will have to focus on his mental wounds first so I may have to ask either you or Sam to tend to his physical ones.”

Dean nodded, rubbing a hand over his face in an effort to wake up. Castiel looked up at him sympathetically.

“Would you like me to wake you?”

Dean blinked at the angel and struggled not to get lost in those startlingly blue eyes. Eyes should not be that blue ever. It wasn’t fair.

“Yeah, sure.”

Castiel touched his forehead and it was like he’d just taken three shots of espresso through his nose. Dean shook his head, wrinkling his face, and Castiel looked briefly amused before he went back to preparations, looking around the room.

“Hot water, right,” Dean pulled a bowl from one of their bags and filled it with hot water from the sink, setting it next to the bed before he began pulling out the first aid supplies he and Sam had hoarded over the years. The next time he looked up, Castiel was helping Sam carry Gabriel to the bed. The archangel looked like he’d been put through a shredder and Castiel was worrying his bottom lip as he gazed down at his brother.

Dean and Sam shared a worried look when Gabriel was stretched out on the bed. Castiel hovered over him, brushing his fingertips over the angel’s face and Dean knew he wasn’t seeing the bloody gashes or swollen flesh but the archangel hiding inside of the meatsuit.

“What happened?” Castiel asked softly and Sam went to his side.

“He said he’d come from Hell. I think he went to the Cage.”

Castiel shook his head. “The fool.”

Another minute passed without a word and finally Castiel straightened up, turning to Dean.

“I need you.”

Dean grinned. “Now? So soon? With Sammy here?”

Castiel fought to keep himself from grinning as a blush worked across his cheeks. He huffed and settled on glaring at Dean.

“I mean, I need you to help me heal Gabriel.”

Sam stepped back so Dean could take his place next to Castiel and Castiel took his hand, threading their fingers together.

“This might hurt but it’s the only way I can heal him without completely draining myself.”

Dean nodded seriously for a moment and then grinned. “Just don’t explode me.”

The look on Castiel’s face told him that this wasn’t a laughing matter but the barely contained snort from Sam made him grin. Castiel rolled his eyes but turned back to Gabriel. Dean forced himself to relax and stepped closer to Castiel so his hips brushed against his boyfriend’s. Castiel smiled up at him before reaching down to press two fingers to Gabriel’s forehead.

Dean gasped then set his jaw against the sudden pull on his soul. It didn’t hurt exactly; it just felt like being pinched and pulled the wrong way. He watched as the gashes covering Gabriel’s body melted away and then Castiel was collapsing against him, blood leaking from his nose.

“Whoa!” he yelped, catching Castiel against his chest. Sam was instantly at his side, helping him settle Castiel onto the opposite bed.

Castiel blinked slowly, his eyes unfocused as Dean wiped the blood from his face. Ever so slowly, Castiel managed to focus back on Dean and he smiled weakly.

“Gabriel will be fully healed by morning.” Castiel said firmly, albeit barely above a whisper.

Sam laid a blanket over Castiel and Dean nodded his thanks, brushing the angel’s forehead with his fingertips. 

“Are you going to be okay?” Sam asked quietly, laying a hand over Castiel’s knee. Castiel nodded slowly.

“As long as I have Dean, I am okay.”Castiel said softly, his eyes closing wearily and he fell silent.

Dean swallowed, embarrassed but Sam didn’t say a word. He just nodded and went back to Gabriel. Dean sat on the bed next to Castiel while Sam removed the archangel’s shoes and laid a blanket over him.

“Do you really think he went to the Cage?”

“Yeah,” Sam said softly, sitting on the floor between the beds. “He said he had to say good-bye to his brothers so yeah, I believe him. It’s what I would do.”

“I hope you’d try to drag my ass out of there,” Dean said shortly but his eyes laughed. Sam rolled his eyes and shrugged so Dean continued. “Maybe he didn’t want to help them out. Hell, Lucifer killed him and Michael let it happen.”

“Maybe Michael couldn’t help because…”

“…because I didn’t say ‘yes?’”

“Well…yeah, I guess…”

“Don’t…d-don’t defend that…arrogant prick…”

Gabriel struggled to sit up and Sam was on his feet in an instant, gently pressing him back down.

“You need to sleep.”

Gabriel laughed. “Angels don’t sleep, Sam. Not even Cassie over there is really asleep.”

Dean glanced over his shoulder. “He sure looks asleep. And I’ve slept beside him enough over the past few months to know what he looks like asleep.”

Gabriel shook his head, pressing the heel of his palm to his forehead and Sam sat next to him.

“Angels don’t sleep. We can’t, we can’t even fall unconscious. Not really. What you see as Cas being asleep is just Cas in a kind of trance. In it, we can recharge our batteries faster and it’s good for the vessels, gives them a break, but we’re never unaware of our surroundings.”

Gabriel nodded towards Castiel. “He can hear everything we’re saying, he’ll remember everything that happens while he’s ‘asleep’ and he can wake in a second if he’s needed. Right now, he’s just absorbing all this information and storing it for later use. That’s also why we can’t dream, exactly, though the state of mind the trance induces can cause us to relive our memories.”

His gaze grew sad for a moment and Dean glanced down awkwardly while Sam just looked concerned.

“You said…you said you didn’t want me to defend Michael. Why? Isn’t he your brother?”

“Yeah, he is,” Gabriel said shortly. “By blood alone. He’s an arrogant, self-righteous asshole and he deserves to be in that box.”

“Damn,” Dean exclaimed. Sam’s eyes were wide, taken aback by the archangel’s abruptness. Even Dean looked surprised and Gabriel worked his jaw silently, his eyes dark.

“What’d he do that was so bad?” Sam asked softly.

_“Daddy!”_

_“I am sorry, brother, but this is how it must be.”_

“He killed my daughter.” Gabriel snapped coldly. “He made an example out of her, out of me, to show that no one could escape the wrath of Heaven. That was the day I left home and I haven’t been back since.”

He looked up and realized that the lights in the room were shining abnormally brightly and he laughed, reining his grace in to let them fade back to normal. Dean and Sam blinked as their eyes adjusted and Sam looked at Gabriel sadly.

“Why?” he asked softly after a moment. “Why would he do that?”

Gabriel shook his head. “I really don’t want to talk about this. You have Cas to look after and you both need sleep so I’ll just be going.”

He started to get to his feet but faltered, falling back against the bed. Sam and Dean shared a knowing look before Dean stood, stretching.

“Well, Gabe, it looks like you need to trance just as much as we need to sleep so stick around for a while.”

“Please,” Sam said quietly and Gabriel looked up at the younger Winchester. He thought back to that sudden intense moment where the man sitting less than a foot away from him had chosen him, out of all the faces he knew, to think of when he needed to rub one out. That this man had come with his name on his lips and suddenly, that quiet ‘please’ was enough to keep him rooted to the bed.

“Fine,” Gabriel shrugged. “I do have a weakness for the smell of grime and stale coffee. I might as well stay.”

The smile Sam gave him was worth all the trouble and Gabriel had to smirk to keep himself from blushing. Across the room, Dean had sat down on the opposite side of the bed from Castiel and was kicking his shoes off.

“You better not snore, Gabe, or so help me I will shoot you myself.”

Gabriel snorted. “Just be prepared for the consequences if you do.”

“Guys,” Sam protested as he stood, gathering up a blanket as he prepared to sleep in the chair across the room.

Gabriel smirked but waited until Dean curled up next to Castiel, the angel shifting and adjusting for the new weight against his back. Dean fell asleep faster than any human he’d ever seen and he could only attribute it to years of necessity but in this instance, it allowed him to turn his attention back to the human he cared most about.

“Come on, Sammy,” Gabriel teased as the hunter started to settle in the cheap armchair. “There’s plenty of room on this bed here for both of us.”

Sam looked at him with genuine relief but still he hesitated for a moment. “Really?”

“Get over here.” Gabriel commanded, patting the bed with his palm before shuffling to one side.

Sam eagerly returned to the bed and Gabriel rolled away from him, tucking himself beneath the blanket happily as Sam’s weight settled next to him. He snapped his fingers and the room went dark, hiding his victorious smile.

* * *

When Sam was very young, he had a habit of undressing whoever was in the bed with him. Most often, this was Dean. Dean found it hilarious and would go to bed with as many layers on as possible to see if Sam could have him naked by morning. Sam always would and even as he got older, he was never able to suppress the urge.

It was Jessica who figured out that it was the intimacy of skin contact he was craving and more often than not, she’d simply sleep naked to give him what he needed. It was one of the reasons he loved her, being able to wake up next to her, every inch of her naked skin pressed against his, and he didn’t have to feel awkward about it at all.

And it seemed, as Sam slowly gave in to the sunlight streaming into the motel room, that even after all these years the craving remained the same. He slowly became aware that his face was pressed into the warm, sweet-smelling neck of his bed partner, his arms wrapped around the man’s bare chest and he could feel the rise and fall of his breathing in time with his own. Their legs were tangled together and Sam involuntarily rocked his hips against the man’s thigh, pleased with the nearly automatic reaction from his partner’s cock, now half-hard where it pressed against his stomach.

Then the events of the night before came crashing back. Dean and Castiel needing time alone, jacking off to Gabriel on the hood of the Impala, Gabriel showing up beaten and bloody, Castiel healing him, Gabriel inviting him to share the bed, _oh God he was rutting against Gabriel’s leg._

Sam jerked back and out of Gabriel’s arms as if burned, barely aware that the sleepy archangel was now looking at him with a torn look in his eyes before it was replaced by annoyance. Gabriel’s words the night before echoed back to him.

_…we’re never unaware of our surroundings._

Gabriel _knew_ what he’d been doing while he slept and hadn’t stopped him. In fact, the angel’s arms were tightening back around him and pulling him back against his chest.

“Dean…” Sam protested but Gabriel just smirked.

“…is asleep and is going to stay asleep for a while because I said so.”

“Cas…”

“Already knows but he’s perfectly happy curled up next to your brother so shut up.”

Sam fought back a retort but he didn’t have to fight long with Gabriel’s amber eyes staring back at him piercingly. He could feel the long line of the angel’s body pressed against his and he shifted back against him, unconsciously seeking the same contact he sought out at night. Gabriel let him, sliding his arms around Sam’s back to hold him tightly against his chest. Sam was certain Gabriel could hear how hard his heart was pounding, could probably feel it with their chests pressed together.

“I saw you,” Gabriel started after a long pause, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Saw me?” Sam licked his lips nervously. There was only one thing Gabriel could be talking about.

“On the Impala.”

Yep. Only one thing.

“And I heard you call my name. That’s how I found you, actually.”

Sam felt the heated blush crossing his cheeks, saw the smirk on Gabriel’s lips, and decided he’d had just about enough of being embarrassed by this angel. Even if Dean and Castiel were in the other bed, it wouldn’t be the first time he’d catered to his inner exhibitionist.

“But did you really see?” Sam purred, his eyelids drooping as he let his lips part slightly, sliding his hand down Gabriel’s torso to grip his hip. “Did you see my thoughts, Gabriel? How I imagined your body sliding over mine, skin to skin? The way you would lick your lips before sliding them over my cock, my hand fisting in your hair as I fuck your mouth? The way you would _moan…”_

Gabriel’s eyes were wide now, his lips parted slightly, his face flushed. Sam smirked back at him, his eyes flashing mischievously.

“I think I missed the best parts.” Gabe murmured.

They crashed together, Gabriel’s kiss brutal and fierce and Sam tasted blood when he rolled Gabriel’s lower lip between his teeth. Gabriel’s fingers hooked into his back and he tangled his fingers in the archangel’s hair, pulling his head back to nip and suck at his neck. Gabriel growled softly, rolling over him to pin Sam into the mattress, rocking their hips together. Sam had to bite his lip to suppress a moan, Gabriel’s hand sliding roughly between his legs to force them apart.

They froze when Dean’s phone began loudly blaring Metallica. Fear crept back into Sam’s eyes as Dean stirred, reaching blindly for his cell. Castiel delicately picked it up without opening his eyes and tucked it into Dean’s searching hand. Silence filled the room and Sam felt Gabriel’s weight disappear and he was left alone in the bed, hot and horny and wanting. Since neither Dean nor Castiel had decided to move yet, he quickly got up, grabbed a clean change of clothes, and headed to the bathroom for a cold shower.


	2. On My Shoulders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel shares a secret with Castiel, which serves to hide a much larger secret. 
> 
> [NC-17]

* * *

Sam wasn’t expecting Gabriel back any time soon for some reason so he was terribly surprised when he came out of the bathroom and there was a full spread breakfast buffet against one wall. Dean was already at the table with an overloaded plate, and Castiel was watching him eat with amusement.

Gabriel made no attempt to hide his appreciative stare for the way drops of water still clung to Sam’s bare chest, smirking at the way the half-dressed hunter stared back at him in surprise. He shrugged lightly and Sam shook his head, obviously frustrated with him but unable to say anything in front of his brother.

Sam pulled his shirt on angrily, trying not to show how much the archangel’s simple presence was making the effects of his cold shower null and void. Dean was grinning through a mouthful of eggs.

“Look, Sam, Gabe made breakfast.”

“I see,” Sam said shortly and turned his head, seeking out Castiel’s gaze. The angel looked up at him fondly and Sam let his gaze flick to the archangel and then back to Castiel. Thankfully, his brother’s boyfriend got the message and stood, brushing his fingers over Dean’s hand as he did, before going to Gabriel’s side.

“Gabriel, I need to speak with you alone for a moment, if you don’t mind.”

Gabriel looked startled but shrugged. “Yeah, sure, bro.”

A second later, both angels were gone and Sam let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“Dude, you have to try these waffles. They’re amazing.”

Sam laughed, picking up one of the clean white plates painted delicately with tiny blue flowers. Gabriel could be so over the top sometimes. “Better than Cas’ lopsided pancakes?”

“Not even close.” Dean said firmly. “But don’t tell anyone I said that.”

Sam shrugged, filling his plate. “You should tell Cas. He could probably use an ego boost.”

Dean frowned, looking up at him as he sat down. “What d’you mean? He’s happy, right?”

“Yeah,” Sam agreed quickly, seeing the angle his brother was taking it and quickly nipping the protective boyfriend streak out of the conversation. “Just sometimes I catch him, you know, staring off into space and he looks so sad. I don’t think it’s anyone’s fault…” he added quickly. “I just think that maybe…maybe he’s homesick or something. He certainly spends most of his time with us.”

Dean frowned, obviously caught up in his own thoughts but Sam knew better than to ask. When Dean had that look in his eyes, the time for chick flick moments had passed. He just hoped Castiel enjoyed whatever Dean was now planning to cheer up his angel boyfriend.

“So,” Dean started with a new glint in his eye.

“So?” Sam countered, opening his laptop to skim the local news.

“You still sleep-undressing people? Betcha Gabe loved that.”

Sam coughed, nearly spewing eggs all over his laptop. “ _Dean!”_

* * *

Castiel let Gabriel lead them where he willed, the archangel’s grace tugging him along until they came to rest atop the Eiffel Tower. Gabriel idly kicked his legs childishly while Castiel sat somewhat more reserved, awkwardly trying to find how to begin.

“What are you doing with Sam, brother?”

Gabriel looked up in surprise. “Just some harmless fun, relax.”

Castiel looked back at him solemnly. “Gabriel…”

“Look,” Gabriel interrupted him. “I know your first time was with the last man you’re ever going to sleep with but committed sex really isn’t the norm, especially not with humans. You should know that. Dean was a man-whore before you.”

“Thank you for the reminder.” Castiel replied, his tone acidic, and Gabriel flinched.

“I…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to come out that way. I’m just saying…if Sam and I want to have casual sex, don’t worry about it.”

“Dean won’t like it. That means I must worry about it.”

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “He doesn’t have to find out.”

“I won’t lie to him.”

“You’re ridiculous, you know that?” Gabriel snorted before tossing up his hands. “Fine, don’t lie. Not like I’m ashamed anyway. On to more pressing matters, how did you heal me without draining your mojo, Cassie?”

Castiel flinched at the nickname before shrugging. “I attached myself to Dean’s soul before I attempted to heal you.”

“And you didn’t rip a hole through him?”

Castiel looked confused, shaking his head slowly. “He appeared to be fine when we left.”

“I know,” Gabriel snorted. He suddenly wished that maybe, at least, just one of his brothers was there and maybe, just maybe, this duty didn’t fall to him. But there was no one else and if Heaven was going to become what it should be, he had to bring Castiel up right. “But you should’ve.”

“Coming into contact with Dean’s soul has been easier since he used its power to restore my grace. I assumed, since my new power comes from him, that was why I was able to do so.”

Gabriel laughed lightly at Castiel’s concern, reaching over to ruffle his younger brother’s hair.

“Relax, Cassie, you’re not hurting your boyfriend. It’s just…just a sign that I was hoping I wouldn’t have to deal with.”

“What sign?” Castiel asked quickly, shoving his hand away.

“Eh, nothing you need to worry about, just an archangel thing. I’ve been out of the game so long; I hoped I wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore. But, since Michael and Lucifer are downstairs and Raphael just fell all to pieces, I’m the only one left.”

Gabriel laughed as he pulled a Blow Pop from his pocket, watermelon flavored. He twisted the top of the wrapped, not quite taking it off. He shook his head. “Doesn’t that thought just make you want to get totally and completely wasted?”

“No, not really.”

“Oh, come on. All of Heaven is resting in my hands! Let’s get _shit-faced!”_

Castiel shook his head, smiling at the archangel’s antics then yelped when Gabriel hauled him to his feet as if he were little more than a kitten.

“I don’t want to get drunk, Gabriel,” he protested weakly but Gabriel just laughed as he stretched his wings and in an instant, they were flying.

“Relax,” Castiel heard through the wind. “Get Dean’s cock out of your ass long enough to chill with your big bro.”

Castiel slid an arm over his brother’s shoulder, using a wing to shield himself from the wind rolling off of Gabriel’s wings. It was easier to cling to the archangel than try and fly alongside him so Castiel hid against his chest. Then they were landing in Bobby’s kitchen, the table and cabinets rattling at their arrival. Castiel slowly slid from Gabriel’s arms, his hair blown forward into his face and he took a moment to smooth it out.

“Heyo, Bobby! We’re home!” Gabriel laughed before he began gathering the empty whiskey bottles lining the counter. “Hey, Cas, hand me that pitcher over there.”

* * *

Dean was pacing outside the motel. It had been at least three hours since Gabriel and Castiel had disappeared and he tried to pretend he wasn’t on the brink of panic. He was aware Sam was watching him, amused, and he glared at his younger brother.

“Shut up.”

Sam scoffed. “I didn’t say anything.”

“You were thinking it.”

“All I was thinking,” Sam laughed. “Was that you’re such a cute jealous boyfriend.”

Dean set his jaw, clenching and unclenching his fists.

“Look, Gabriel and Castiel probably just lost track of time wherever they were. Can we go?”

“If we leave, they won’t be able to find us.” Dean repeated for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Dean,” Sam shook his head, trying not to laugh. “I realize that this is the most time you and Cas have spent apart in months but…”

He was cut off by the buzz of his phone and Dean froze, staring at the object as Sam pulled it out of his pocket. “It’s Bobby.”

Dean walked over as Sam answered the phone, breaking into a grin in a few seconds. “Yeah…yeah, Bobby, we’re on our way…Okay.”

Sam closed the phone, shaking his head. “Gabriel and Cas are over at Bobby’s. Gabriel has apparently kicked him out of the kitchen, saying that he was ‘brewing.’ Bobby tried to get information out of Castiel but he’s as confused as Bobby is.”

“So let’s go!” Dean huffed, shoving Sam away from the door so he could get in.

“I’m sorry,” Castiel said suddenly from behind them. “This will be faster.”

The next instant, they were in Bobby’s front yard, car and all. Dean sighed and shut the car door.

“I never get to drive anymore.” He pouted.

“I _am_ sorry.” Castiel repeated. “But Gabriel is beginning to frighten me.”

Sam and Dean shared a look before Dean slid an arm around Castiel’s waist, letting the angel fall back against him as Sam led the way up the stairs and into the kitchen. Castiel flinched at the sound of breaking glass and then Gabriel was skirting around Sam to hand his younger brother a shot glass full of clear liquid.

“Here, try this. I think I did fabulously myself, but I could be wrong. Wait, no, scratch that. I’m never wrong.”

Gabriel turned his own shot glass up, draining it in a single swallow while Castiel looked skeptically at his own. Gabriel nudged him, waiting impatiently as Castiel glanced up at Dean before taking the shot, swallowing it down quickly. Half a second later he was doubled over, coughing against the burn in his throat as Dean supported him, rubbing his back. Castiel glanced up, his eyes watering.

“What…”

Sam looked around the kitchen, taking in the empty bottles of whiskey and several pitchers now filled with clear liquid. Gabriel nodded approvingly as Castiel struggled to get his breath back.

“Fantastic. That’s exactly the reaction I was expecting.”

Castiel rubbed his chest, his face contorted in displeasure. Dean took the shot glass from him, taste testing the last drop in the glass.

“…water?”

“HOLY WATER!” Gabriel exclaimed happily.

Castiel’s eyes went wide. “You didn’t…you aren’t…that’s a _rumor_ , it can’t possibly be true!”

“You’re the proof.” Gabriel laughed. “Because that burned, didn’t it? You’ve had tequila, whiskey, vodka and none of it burned like that just did.”

Castiel blushed furiously as Gabriel grabbed the nearest whiskey bottle full of holy water and refilled Castiel’s shot glass. Dean laughed and grabbed actual whiskey, pouring himself a shot. Sam shook his head, laughing as Gabriel raised his bottle.

“To new beginnings!” Gabriel laughed and Castiel smiled weakly.

“To new beginnings!” Dean repeated and all three drank, Gabriel just turning up the bottle as Castiel sputtered through his second shot.

“You know the best part?” Gabriel continued. “There’s no hangover with holy water.”

Eyes watering, Castiel just glared at him, disbelief clouding his eyes and Gabriel laughed. Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel’s waist, offering his support.

“It’s not like alcohol. What you’re getting drunk on is the grace the water’s now filled with. It’s what burns demons and it pumps up your mojo until you’re flying high. It’ll burn itself off in a few hours but until then…”

Gabriel picked up another bottle, handing the half empty one to Castiel, and grinned broadly as he fought the urge to laugh hysterically.

“Heaven’s in my hands. Oh, we’re so _fucked._ ”

Dean and Sam shared a long look as Castiel stared incredulously back at Gabriel before draining his shot, and turning the bottle up in sync with his brother.

* * *

It wasn’t long before Castiel was unsteadily chasing after Dean, who had stolen Bobby’s radio and was blaring Metallica. Bobby had apparently retreated to the basement for some peace and quiet, and threatened them all with death if he was disturbed so they left him alone. Sam ordered pizza and Gabriel tried to coax him into drinking. The archangel bounced from refilling Castiel’s shot glass then back to Sam’s side, never hesitating to brush his hips against Sam’s or smack his ass in passing.

Luckily, Dean was paying far more attention to his giggling and unsteady boyfriend than to what Gabriel was trying to do to Sam in the kitchen. About the third time Castiel nearly fell over, Dean wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s waist and lifted Castiel’s arms to his shoulders, turning the angel’s awkward movements into something that could resemble dancing while the lilting strains of “Nothing Else Matters” wafted from the radio. Awkward dancing turned into gentle swaying as Castiel melted against him, pressing his face into Dean’s neck. Dean held the angel close against his chest as he hummed in time with the song.

Sam watched them wistfully from the kitchen doorway until Gabriel hooked a hand into his belt and pulled him back, turning him so he was pressing Gabriel back against the counter. Sam smirked at the slightly inebriated archangel.

“Somehow I never saw you as the ‘let’s get wasted’ type.”

Gabriel shrugged, hopping up backwards onto the counter and then tugged Sam forward so he was standing between his legs. He shifted so he could take a long pull from the bottle and Sam found himself once again reminded that the archangel didn’t actually need to breathe.

“If you knew what was riding on me, you’d get drunk too.” Gabriel murmured, his lips trailing over the bottleneck, catching any wayward drops with his tongue.

Sam was entranced by the angel’s attention to the bottle, but glanced over his shoulder at the sound of something breaking, followed by Dean’s deep laugh and Castiel’s stifled giggling. He shook his head, turning back to Gabriel as the archangel slid his hands over Sam’s shoulders. He let his hands fall to Gabriel’s hips, trying to see past the sudden sadness in the angel’s amber eyes.

“What’s wrong, Gabe? What’s riding on you?”

“Wish you were.” Gabriel slurred before shaking his head. “Don’t want to talk about it. Too much.”

“Okay,” Sam said softly and Gabriel’s iron grip drew him closer, the angel’s fingers sliding up through his hair. He’d be lying if he didn’t like the feel of it, soothing and erotic all at the same time. He felt Gabriel’s heels dig into the back of his thighs, edging him still closer.

“Want to kiss you, Sammy.” Gabriel murmured, sliding his hands over Sam’s chest. Sam couldn’t help but smile, tucking his hand beneath Gabriel’s chin to lift his head up. He’d learned from experience that it was better not to deny Loki something that he asked for, especially so nicely.

His kiss was soft and chaste at first, warm against Gabriel’s lips and Gabriel slid forward, tightening his arms around Sam’s neck. In sharp contrast to the first time they kissed, this one was light, breathy as their lips moved together and Sam let out a soft sigh, content.

“Come with me.” Sam said shortly and took Gabriel’s hand, leading him past the couple in the living room where they had apparently forgotten about the others in the house. Dean half lay on the couch with Castiel in his lap, the angel unabashedly grinding against him. As Sam watched, Dean slid a hand beneath Castiel’s shirt and Castiel smiled, tilting Dean’s head back for a kiss.

Sam shook his head and led Gabriel out of the house where the sun had just finished setting, the evening air full of crickets and the soft sounds of early nightfall.

“This feels familiar,” Gabriel commented, a tinge of amusement in his voice as he stumbled over the steps, following Sam dutifully. Sam laughed, reaching back to take the archangel’s hand, leading him into the forest of cars.

_Very familiar. Too familiar._

Gabriel fought his own drunken mind for a moment, coming to a stop amid the cars and Sam turned back to look at him. For that brief second, the familiar took shape in his mind, forming the barren memory of a wiry youth with gray-blue eyes. Then Gabriel was laughing, shaking his head.

“I’m losing my mind!” he wailed melodramatically and Sam laughed, catching the archangel against his chest when Gabriel tried to twirl away from him. Gabriel fell against him, laughing as his hands fell over Sam’s. Sam leaned back against the nearest car, bending to press a kiss to Gabriel’s jaw.

“Shut up, Gabriel.” He murmured against the shell of his ear and Gabriel muttered something unintelligible before turning in Sam’s arms.

“Yeah? And if I don’t?”

Sam looked down at him earnestly. “Then I’m going to make you scream.”

Gabriel’s breath caught in his throat unwillingly as a thousand worthy retorts died on his tongue. Instead he grabbed Sam’s head and pulled him down to his lips. Sam fought against his lips for control of the kiss, alternating forcing his tongue into Gabriel’s mouth and sucking Gabriel’s tongue back into his. Gabriel would never admit it but he lost himself in the way Sam turned to push him against the car, grinding their hips together as he slid a hand down Gabriel’s chest to the now obvious bulge in his jeans.

Gabriel, of course, certainly did not gasp when Sam nipped and sucked at his collar bone, working him through his jeans. He did not cling to the taller man’s shoulder because his legs threatened to give out on him. He did not pant in rhythm with the way his hips ground against Sam’s hand. He was an archangel. He did none of these things.

“Sammy,”

He did slide a hand through Sam’s hair when the hunter dropped to his knees, his lips parted and swollen from the way Gabriel had bitten at them. He did smirk when Sam undid his belt and unzipped his jeans, palming at his cock through the thin fabric of his boxers. Sam, the boy with the demon blood, Lucifer’s vessel, the Righteous Man’s little brother, was sucking at him through the fabric until it was dark with his saliva. Only then did Sam slide his fingers through the band of his boxers, pushing them down around his hips to free his now leaking erection.

Sam didn’t hesitate, showing an ease Gabriel hadn’t expected as he slid his hand down the shaft, eagerly licking a drop of precum from the tip before he drew the entire head into his mouth, teasing the slit with his tongue.

“Fuck, Sam,” Gabriel stared down, his mouth parted in a silent ‘O’ as he watched his cock disappeared inch by inch into Sam’s greedy mouth until he was pressed against the back of Sam’s throat. Sam groaned and swallowed around him and Gabriel could sense the arousal tensing Sam’s body just from this simple act.

He allowed himself a glance into Sam’s mind, just wanting to see what was making him gasp out those little noises like the feel of cock in his mouth was God’s very gift to him.

_Toolongtoolongtoolongohit’s been so fucking long wantwantwant so much want to feelitfeelitburn in me feel it own me break me ohGodfuckyes_

By the time Gabriel jerked himself back out of Sam’s thoughts, he was using his grip in Sam’s hair to hold his head steady as he rutted hard into his mouth. Tears pricked at Sam’s eyes but his tight grip on Gabriel’s hips wasn’t pushing him away. Rather, it helped pull Gabriel’s thrusts into his waiting mouth. The hunter beneath him groaned and whimpered, his fingers digging little half moons into Gabriel’s pale skin and Gabriel had to admit this was probably the last thing he’d expected of little big Sammy.

Of all the possible things in the world, Dad had given him a very slutty Sammy.

Listening to Sam’s thoughts, coupled with staring down at the human hungrily devouring his cock and the grace from the holy water rushing in his ears, Gabriel’s stamina had hit rock bottom. He could already feel his wings unfurling, stretching out above him, and dwarfing the car he was pressed against.

“Sam…” he gasped, trying to give the hunter a little warning. “I’m…I’m gonna…”

Sam’s only response was to wrap an arm around his waist and rather than trying to pull away, he actually tightened his grip on Gabriel’s hips, pulling the angel harder against him until Gabriel was grounded tight and deep in Sam’s throat.

“Sam, oh fuck, Sam _yes SAM!_ ”

Sam whined at the salty sweet taste that burst over his tongue and poured itself down his throat, burning and searing its way through him, light burning against his eyes and boiling against his skin and up from within him. He felt his own orgasm tearing its way through him even as he swallowed Gabriel’s down, his cock spurting into his jeans without even the slightest attention and he shuddered, clinging to Gabriel until the angel pulled back from his mouth.

“Was that my name I heard?” he smirked, licking his lips as he lightly stroked Gabriel’s cock, guessing the angel had a short refractory period. As he felt him beginning to harden once again, he knew he was right.

“Shut up before I smite your ass.” Gabriel griped, his hips jerking in time with Sam’s strokes.

“Please, please smite my ass, Gabriel.” Sam gasped, dragging his lips along his shaft. “I want you to, I want to feel you stretch me, break me, ream me open and tear me apart, fill me up and come inside me. I want to feel you dripping down my thighs. I want you to make me come over and over again and fuck me until I can’t come anymore and fuck me still. Fuck me until I can’t breathe for gasping your name and fuck me until I black out with your name on my lips.”

“Oh, hells yeah,” Gabriel gasped, pulling the hunter up onto his feet and throwing him over onto his stomach on the trunk of the car. Sam whined, his hands scrambling for purchase on the rusted metal before Gabriel was jerking his pants off, the fabric ripping beneath the archangel’s hands and it was all Sam could do to hold on.

Sam pushed his hips back against where he could feel Gabriel’s cock pressed against the cleft of his ass and he fought the urge to whine, to beg, and then it didn’t matter anymore because Gabriel was pulling his shirt off, buttons popping and he could feel the seams of his shirt giving way to the archangel’s strength and then he was naked, exposed out beneath the setting sun and all it did was make his cock twitch in want.

“Gabriel, please,” he begged, pushing his hips back. “Please, I need it, please.”

_It’s been too long…_

“Well, aren’t you a needy little slut?” Gabriel murmured, grinding against him. He didn’t even bother to finish undressing, just smacked a hand over the bare ass now spread out for him and Sam cried out, his toes curling before he pushed his hips back.

“Harder,” Sam whined.

Gabriel retreated back for a moment, sliding his belt out of the loops of his jeans and folding it over on itself. Sam glanced back over his shoulder, his mouth parted, sweat gluing his hair to his forehead. The crack of the belt against his flesh jerked a cry from his lips and Sam groaned low and slow, his hands clenching and unclenching against the metal of the car.

Gabriel watched the way the hunter’s skin rippled under the blow of his belt. Sam’s toes curled into the dirt, his boots long abandoned, and he whined, his forehead slamming down against the car.

“Ga..Gabriel…” Sam cried in tune with each strike. “Please…please…please fuck me, I need it, please, Gabriel… _oh fuck.”_

The last words turned into a moan when Gabriel abandoned his composure to slide his cock against Sam’s ass one last time before lining himself up with Sam’s entrance, pushing himself into the puckered rosette and Sam moaned, open mouthed as he pushed back against Gabriel, stretching to take him in even though it had been years since he’d given himself over to someone this way. He nearly blacked out from the pain but he felt Gabriel’s grace drawing him back, dimming the pain until the archangel ground against his prostate as if he knew exactly where it was this whole time.

Gabriel wasted no time, digging his hands into Sam’s hips as he drew out, barely letting the tip sit inside Sam before slamming back home, setting a grueling and wicked pace that shoved Sam against the car, leaving him straining for purchase against the metal. Gabriel draped the belt over Sam’s back, a steady reminder of the bruises growing over his ass and lower back, perpetuated as the angel brutally slammed into him.

Sam had lost all track of how long it had been since he let himself be abused this way and every thrust crushed him roughly against the car, the metal digging into his skin, highlights to the pleasure-pain from Gabriel’s pounding. Words poured from his mouth but he couldn’t remember what he was saying, if anything of importance. Gabriel shifted his hips, pulling Sam back against him and Sam howled as he pounded against his prostate over and over again until the hunter climaxed with a strangled cry, painting the rusted metal with his semen.

Without missing a beat, Gabriel reached around and began stroking the overly sensitive flesh to hardness once again and tears ran down Sam’s face as he bucked against Gabriel, caught between pressing back into his thrusts and jerking forward into his hand. He was dimly aware that his chest was one long bleeding scrape against the metal then Gabriel’s thrusts were coming shorter, harder; the angel was panting in his ear and a strange light was pressing against his closed eyelids.

“ _Sam!”_

Gabriel came with a choked shout and Sam wailed against the sudden heat burning through him, the light pulsing against and inside his skin once again until he felt it might break. His own cock spurted over Gabriel’s hand and he wept as his world turned bright, his thoughts an ever clear expanse of white where nothing existed but himself and Gabriel.

Gabriel panted against Sam’s back, his forehead pressed between the hunter’s shoulder blades and the mortal hunter was violently trembling beneath him. After a moment, Gabriel pushed himself up, taking in the bloody and broken man draped over the car and he gently let himself slip out of Sam, supporting him as they fell back against the grass, Sam falling to be cradled against the angel’s chest. He let his grace flow over Sam, healing the worst of his scrapes but leaving the bruises as a tell-tale reminder. He had a feeling Sam would like to keep them and as Sam slid a hand over one such bruise on his hip and smiled, Gabriel knew he had something special here.

“Okay…seriously, when did you…”

“Shhh…” Sam cut him off, blindly covering Gabriel’s face with his hand, his eyelids drooping closed. “No talking.”

Gabriel pouted but acquiesced indulgently, leaning back against the side of the car as Sam relaxed against his chest. They were quiet, watching the moon rise over the trees. As the moon rose higher, the chill of night creeping in, Sam suddenly became aware of the uneven hitching of Gabriel’s breathing. He twisted in the archangel’s arms to look up and squeaked when he saw tears running down his face.

“Gabriel!” Sam gasped, twisting to straddle the angel’s lap and wrapping his arms around his shoulders. He quickly wiped the tears from his cheeks but he couldn’t keep up, they flowed too quickly. Gabriel just shook his head, denying Sam’s unspoken request to know what was wrong so Sam just held him a little tighter. Gabriel let himself relax in the hunter’s arms, pressing his face to Sam’s neck as if he could hide himself there.

“What if I fuck up?” Gabriel suddenly whispered but shook his head when Sam pressed the matter, pushing himself against the hunter’s chest as if he could burrow into Sam’s very skin and hide there. 

* * *

Dean and Castiel had finally passed out, the angel spread out over Dean’s chest. The hunter snored lightly and the holy water had made even Castiel’s perception of the surrounding world fuzzy. Bobby had haphazardly tossed a blanket over the two before going upstairs to bed as well. 

So there were no witnesses when a single downy feather materialized from thin air, burning fierce and bright with grace for a fragile second before it turned black and fell, turning to ash on the floor. 

-


	3. Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam stays behind when Dean and Castiel go out for Halloween. Gabriel pops in to visit, and Castiel enters a drinking contest.
> 
> [NC-17]

Morning dawned on the sleeping household and Dean woke unusually alone, his face pressed into the couch pillow instead of the warm back of his angel. He stretched, frowning at where his brother lay across the living room, nestled into a warm pile of blankets Dean had never seen before. Upon closer inspection, he had to guess Gabriel had summoned them to make a bed for Sam simply because Bobby would not own blankets that flamboyant.

“Cas?” he called softly, rubbing his forehead. He’d certainly drank enough the night before to put down a few grown men so it served him right that he had a hangover.

_“Downstairs.”_ He heard Castiel’s voice in his mind and got unsteadily to his feet, pouring himself a glass of water before stumbling down the stairs to the basement.

Castiel greeted him with a kiss at the foot of the stairs, running a hand over his face and clearing away the fog his mind in which his mind had been enveloped. Dean smiled, sliding his arm around Castiel’s bare waist and kissing him in return. Castiel’s skin was slick with sweat and Dean blinked, tilting his head.

“Why are you sweaty and shirtless?”

Castiel turned, motioning behind him to where Gabriel was working, wearing a t-shirt with Tony Stark and Bruce Banner on it. ‘SCIENCE BROS’ was splashed across the chest.

“We’re just about done fixing the panic room. I thought, since we broke it, we should fix it.” Castiel explained softly.

“He used puppy eyes on me,” Gabriel complained, looking at the blueprints. “Are little brothers just born with that ability or something? Sam’s got the biggest puppy eyes on the planet.”

Dean laughed and nodded. “Yeah, he’s sure got some skills with those. Where’s Bobby?”

“Upstairs,” Castiel answered. “Still sleeping. I’m surprised you are awake so early.”

Dean shifted uncomfortably. He was sure it was probably because Castiel hadn’t been next to him. He’d gotten so used to the angel sleeping by his side that he felt exposed without him there. But he didn’t want to admit that in front of Gabriel.

“Do you guys want some help?”

Castiel and Gabriel shook their heads simultaneously and Dean watched as Gabriel lifted a slab of six inch thick steel into place with one hand, the other holding the blueprints.

“Cas?” Gabriel prompted and Castiel raised his hand, the bolts popping into place automatically to hold the sheet in place. Dean shook his head, chucking to himself.

“Guess you guys really don’t need help. I’ll just stand over here and supervise.”

Gabriel scoffed but Castiel smiled, taking the blueprints from Gabriel. The two angels worked in near silence, communicating only with rare and clipped conversations in Enochian, but it was oddly peaceful to Dean. He sat on the floor and watched them work, sipping on his water, offering the odd bit of a advice and Castiel would often stop by to brush a kiss over his skin, never in the same place twice.

“Hey Cas,” Dean interrupted after the last kiss and Castiel paused, turning back to him. Gabriel huffed in exasperation as they were almost done but Dean got to his feet, pressing lightly on Castiel’s shoulder to turn him around. He felt Castiel’s wings flutter nervously even though he couldn’t see them.

“Dean…” Castiel warned as Dean set his water down, Gabriel looking over curiously as Dean ran his fingertips lightly over Castiel’s shoulder.

“Relax, I’m not going for your wings,”

Castiel did visibly relax as Gabriel snorted, setting the last piece in place himself and going to line up the door. Dean glanced his way as he passed before turning his attention to the tiny black dots on Castiel’s shoulder blades that he was sure hadn’t been there the night before.

“You have freckles on your back,” He noted after a moment. “I never noticed them before.”

Castiel laughed. “As much as you have seen me naked, there is a part of me you don’t know?”

Dean shook his head, chuckling lightly and Castiel turned to face him. “Hey, I don’t have angel memory. Besides, there were other parts of you I was probably more focused on.”

Actually, quite the opposite. He knew every inch of Castiel by heart. He’d wake some mornings and trace the line of muscles from Castiel’s collarbone to his hip, shoulder to ass, and those freckles hadn’t been there before. But then Castiel was stretching up to kiss him, both hands resting on his chest, and Dean couldn’t worry about something as stupid as freckles when Castiel was kissing him.

“Sam’s up.” Castiel whispered when they broke apart and Dean glanced up at the ceiling, hearing his brother stumble around upstairs.

“I’ll go warm up some pizza for breakfast.”

He slid past Gabriel on the way out and Gabriel nodded to him, waiting until Dean was upstairs to turn to his brother.

“What was he looking at?”

Castiel shrugged. “Apparently, I have ‘freckles’ on my back though I was certain that my vessel has no such thing.”

“Turn around.”

Castiel obediently turned and let Gabriel peer at his back with far more scrutiny that he had allowed Dean. After all, his wings did not react to Gabriel as they did to Dean. Gabriel traced the line of freckles over his shoulder blades, following a pattern only he could see.

“Is it something I should worry about?” Castiel asked curiously, looking back at his brother over his shoulder. Gabriel shook his head.

“Nah, it’s just where your wings are showing through on your vessel. No big deal.”

Castiel smiled in relief. “Let’s hurry and finish before Bobby wakes up.”

* * *

An hour later, Castiel joined Dean and Sam in the kitchen where they were eating pizza leftover from the night before. Sam was scrolling through the news on his laptop while Dean seemed content with his pizza alone. Castiel sank into the chair next to Dean, setting his hand lightly on Dean’s thigh. Gabriel bounced through a moment later, pouring holy water into a mug for himself before hopping up on the counter.

“Panic room finished?”

“Ayup,” Gabriel agreed, kicking his heels. He sipped his holy water and tilted his head. “I wonder…”

He vanished for a moment before reappearing with a packet of Grape Kool-aid, which he then dumped into the bottle of holy water he’d just had, along with far more sugar than was probably necessary, and proceeded to shake it up. Castiel looked at him with amusement at the same time Dean shook his head, laughing to himself. Sam glanced over and Gabriel winked at him, Sam rolling his eyes in response. Gabriel then refilled his glass with the now grape-flavored holy water and sipped it, smiling in approval.

“I’m a genius.”

“You’re something.” Dean laughed.

“You’re all still here.” Bobby complained, coming into the kitchen rubbing his eyes. He swatted Gabriel off the counter and grabbed a piece of pizza.

“What’d you do last night that has you looking so beat?” Dean teased. “Still not giving any ground on the mystery woman?”

“Nope.” Bobby answered shortly as Sam looked up.

“Mystery woman?”

“Yeah,” Dean explained, grinning even as Bobby glared at him. “Bobby’s apparently got himself a steady squeeze and won’t give up any juicy details.”

“Ain’t Cas taught you to mind your own business yet?”

“Oh, come on, Bobby! My life is booo- _ring_! You gotta spill!” Gabriel prompted and Bobby snorted.

“I ain’t gotta do nuthin’.”

“Well, I’m sure,” Sam said firmly. “We’ll find out all about her when Bobby is ready for us to find out.”

Both Gabriel and Dean glared at Sam but he just shrugged, looking to Castiel who nodded.

“I agree with Sam.”

“Damn!” Gabriel complained. “I thought for sure Cas was going to side with Dean.”

Castiel looked amused. “Is it unusual that Dean and I share differing opinions on many things?”

“Really?” Dean turned to his boyfriend. “Like what?”

Castiel blushed, glancing down at the table and he picked at the napkin Dean had been using for a plate. “I am not…exactly… _fond_ of Metallica.”

Dean stared at him in mock-horror. “I can’t…believe…how could you do this to me, Cas!?”

Luckily, he gave away his joke with the way he fought to keep from smiling and Cas swatted at his arm with all the anger of a playful kitten. _“Dean!_ I am joking anyway. _”_

“Well, guys, I’ll see you later.” Gabriel announced after a moment. “There’s a party in Greece right now that I am NOT missing.”

He grabbed the purple holy water and gave them all a general wave. “Peace.”

And then he was gone.

Sam didn’t look up to see Gabriel go, too caught up in the article he was reading. Dean tapped his fingers on the table for a minute before grinning.

“Guys, you know what next Friday is, right?”

“No…” Sam started carefully, looking up at his brother.

“Halloween,” Dean grinned.

“No, Dean.”

“Oh come on!” Dean protested, sitting back. “It’ll be Castiel’s first real Halloween as a member of this family. We need to celebrate it right.”

Sam shook his head. “Then you two go out and have fun. I don’t do Halloween.”

“What’s wrong, Sam?” Castiel asked quietly, concerned. Sam shook his head.

“I just don’t like Halloween. The whole haunted house, scary monster gig…I mean, that’s our whole lives. Why play at it?”

“Sam has a point, Dean,” Castiel said softly and Dean tossed up his hands.

“Fine, we won’t celebrate traditionally. But we have to do something.” Dean stared at Castiel until the angel nodded, agreeing.

“We will do something.”

“Until then,” Sam interrupted. “I think I have something here. Little town a few hours west of here, people have been disappearing at an old mansion. Six, so far and no bodies have been recovered.”

Castiel stood and walked over to Sam, looking at the article over his shoulder. “Yes. I will go ahead and scout since I am certain Dean would like to make the drive.”

Sam rolled his eyes as Dean eagerly jumped to his feet. “Road trip!”

Castiel and Sam shared a look and Sam laughed lightly. “Him and his Baby…”

“I’m not sure if I should be jealous or not.” Castiel remarked, amused.

“Nah,” Bobby laughed. “There’s no substitute for the relationship a man has with his car but you’re on a whole ‘nother level.”

Castiel smiled softly. “There’s no need to reassure me. I know Dean loves me.”

A few minutes later, Sam and Dean had finished restocking their ammo supplies and Bobby waved them good-bye. Castiel spread his wings and flew ahead, scouting out the town and the mansion where the disappearances had been occurring. There was definitely a dark force and he flew back to the Impala to report.

Castiel quietly cleared his throat to announce his presence and Dean smiled. “Hey, Cas.”

Sam glanced up and smiled as well.

“There is something I’ve wanted to do.” Castiel said off-handedly.

“Oh yeah?” Dean inquired.

“I would like to try pie.”

Sam laughed out and Dean looked shocked. “You mean, all this time…and I haven’t made you try pie yet?”

Castiel’s soft smile was telling and Dean slammed his hand on the steering wheel.

“I am a horrible…horrible boyfriend.”

“Yes,” Sam agreed, laughing. “You really are.”

Dean punched his arm and shook his head. “Don’t worry, Cas. There’s a great place near here I’ll take you as soon as we’re done with this job.”

* * *

The job turned out to be fairly easy. A vampire had been using the mansion, a teenage hangout, for its hunting grounds. Castiel tracked it back to its nest and between the three of them, no vampire that had tasted human blood escaped alive. They drove to a back road and parked out under the clear night sky, Dean and Cas curled up on the hood of the Impala while Sam was stretched out on his back on the roof. Castiel calmly named stars and constellations while Dean idly played with the edge of the angel’s shirt. Every so often, Sam would fling his arm back over his head to smack Dean in the face and Castiel would laugh when Dean flailed, trying to hit his brother back.

The next morning they drove across state lines to a little diner with twelve different kinds of pie, all homemade. Dean bought one of each and had Castiel try each one, taking special note when they both agreed their favorite was the simple apple. Sam just had a salad and watched the two, laughing when Castiel surreptitiously flicked a piece of crust into Dean’s hair when he wasn’t looking and it took Dean a good five minutes to realize it was there.

Life…life was okay for once.

* * *

Gabriel would never, ever, admit to what he was doing at that moment. In all his years, the subject of the BDSM lifestyle had never been very pertinent to him. Of course, he’d dabbled a little bit when his partners seemed interested but Sam…the things he’d seen in Sam’s thoughts…and he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t taken a quick trip back to Sam’s college days for a refresher course…he felt oddly out of his depth.

So that’s how he ended up holed up in an old dom’s attic, reading all the books the man had collected on bondage and dominance, sadomasochism, and anything else that seemed even vaguely applicable. Pausing in his reading, Gabriel tapped his chin lightly with the corner of the book. He had a perpetual boner just from imagining Sam in some of these get-ups.

He finished reading the fifteenth and last book and set it back in the box, lifting his wings to fly out of the attic. He had some shopping to do.

* * *

When Halloween rolled around, Dean, Sam, and Castiel found themselves stopping at one of the nicer motels nearest their last job. Dean had picked up a flyer for a bar a few miles out that was hosting a Halloween party and Castiel had agreed to go with him. Sam, however, rented a couple Halloween comedies, bought more popcorn than he could humanly eat, and chased them both out of the motel room with popcorn kernels.

With the happy couple gone, Sam stretched out on his bed with the massive bowl of popcorn and tried not to think about the way Gabriel had bent him over and claimed him. Hell, he was still sore even a week later. He idly pressed a hand to the bruise on his hip, almost faded, but if he pressed just right, he could remember that pain and what it felt like to be owned.

But Gabriel wasn’t here so he tried to focus on the movie. He was barely halfway through Hocus Pocus when Gabriel appeared shouldering a black duffel bag. The archangel glanced at the movie and smirked before dropping his bag on Dean’s bed, taking in the look of surprise on Sam’s face.

“You really didn’t think I was going to leave it at that, did you? Abandon my very own Slutty Sammy?”

Sam smirked, setting the bowl of popcorn to the side, and he slid his legs over the side of the bed, eyeing the bag.

“You know, Christmas is when you bring presents, not Halloween.”

“This is a present to me, not you, and I buy myself presents all the time so whatever.” Gabriel snorted, turning the bag over and dumping out its contents onto the bed. Sam’s eyes widened then he grinned, his cock jumping in his jeans at the sight of the bondage equipment Gabriel had apparently invested in. He reached out and plucked a coil of rope from the pile, nodding in approval at the quality.

“Only the best for my Slutty Sammy.” Gabriel smirked. “Though, some of it is of my own making. Can’t beat my own imagination.”

Sam laughed, setting the rope back on the pile. “Well, this is the last place I expected to end up tonight, but I have to say it’s definitely a pleasant surprise. So…Gabriel…” Sam slid back on the bed, eyeing Gabriel seductively and Gabriel felt the bag slip from his hands, falling to crumple on the floor. “How many times did my name cross your lips since you’ve been gone?”

* * *

Dean found his way back to the bar with little trouble and more than a little help from Castiel, the angel gently prodding him in the right direction when he seemed confused. It was a loud biker joint and for the first time since claiming Castiel as his boyfriend, he felt apprehension pool in his stomach.

“Dean, what’s wrong?”

Dean shifted into park but didn’t cut the engine, sitting back in his seat. “Don’t take this the wrong way…” he started, taking Castiel’s hand and threading their fingers together. “But places like this…”

“You are worried about how they will perceive us since my vessel is male.” Castiel said quietly, his gaze resting on their entwined hands.

“Yeah…we can go somewhere else…”

“We’ve already been driving for an hour.” Castiel protested and Dean looked surprised.

“It’s just an hour.”

“In my perception,” Castiel explained. “An hour to you is approximately 4.91 days to me.”

“ _Days!?”_ Dean yelped. “5  _days_!? Hell…so driving here…for seven hours…was like a month to you?!”

“Approximately.” Castiel said quietly, a small smile tingeing his lips which Dean had learned was equivalent to the angel grinning fit to burst. “You’re focusing on the bad parts of our travel. Rather, instead focus on last week when we stayed up all night in the back seat of the Impala. For you, that was seven hours. For me, that was _all month._ ”

Castiel slid out of the car with a smirk and Dean followed, cursing. They came back together in front of the Impala and Dean sighed, looking at the bar.

“Are you sure, Cas? I mean…these guys look rough. I can take a few punches but I’d rather you not go Holy Avenger on me, ok?”

Castiel smirked. “Perhaps it is best we pretend we are not a couple for this evening.”

“Dude…we don’t have to do that. Not just to get drunk.”

“I am more concerned about the $1000 prize for the drinking contest they are hosting. I intend on winning.”

Dean was left there staring flabbergasted at his boyfriend’s back as Castiel sauntered over, hands in his pockets. He greeted the man at the door, and by the time Dean got to his side, Castiel just leaned back to him casually.

“Dean, may I have $20 to enter the drinking contest?”

“I’ve been tryin’ ta talk yer bud here out of it. He looks like a lightweight and a couple of mah buds are in this thing.”

Dean just smiled and handed over a $20 bill. “Cas here is a trickster. I’ve never met a man that can out drink him.”

The man grinned and shooed them inside, jotting down ‘Cass’ on his clipboard. Inside, Dean couldn’t help but lay a hand on the small of Castiel’s back, guiding him through the half-costumed crowds to an empty table. They’d barely been there for a second before a mountain of a biker crossed over.

“If you think yer gonna out drink me, then you’re crazy.”

Castiel just smiled. “I assure you, I am here to win.”

The biker grinned. “Why don’t we make it a little sweeter then? $100 says you can’t go shot for shot with me.”

Castiel glanced to Dean, who nodded, and Castiel shrugged. “All right then.”

Dean squeaked when the man hauled Castiel up and half-shoved him into the bar. He followed quickly, making sure to stay as close to Cas as he dared. Castiel’s gaze shifted to him when he slipped in next to him, his blue eyes alight with amusement.

“Dinah, gimme two shots of Wild Turkey for me and my new friend here.”

Castiel smirked up at the man. “Is that all?”

The bartender, Dinah, paused in front of them. “Well, how many do you want, sugar?”

“How many can you give me?” Castiel purred.

She glanced at what remained in the bottle in her hand. “Seven, right now.”

“I’ll take seven then.”

She didn’t bat an eyelash but laid out seven shot glasses and filled each one to the brim.

“Have at it, baby cakes.” She laughed, opening a new bottle.

Castiel didn’t miss a beat from the first shot to the last, each disappearing as fast as she had poured them. The bar whooped in awe and appreciation and Dean couldn’t help the grin that split his face. Castiel just looked back up at the biker and smiled.

“Your turn.”

Less than an hour later, Castiel was the bar favorite to win. While other contestants passed out on their barstools or puked in the bathroom, Castiel casually took shots with anyone willing to buy him one. His step was steady and his speech was barely slurred, but when he looked at Dean his eyes took on a possessive stare and it took all of Dean’s will power not to jump him right then in front of everyone.

“You okay, Cas?” Dean asked for probably the tenth time and Castiel laughed, leaning against him.

“This is nothing compared to the holy water Gabriel made.” Castiel murmured. “It is almost unfair.”

“Yeah, but we need the money.”

Castiel patted his hand, getting to his feet as the bartender had just waved him over. “That’s why I didn’t let you leave.”

Castiel was by far the steadiest of the three remaining contestants that they pulled to the bar. One was the mountain of a biker that had challenged Castiel earlier to a shot for shot count-off. So far Castiel had matched and far exceeded him and Dean looked forward to collecting that $100.

“Alright, now, we’ve got three boys standing and we’re going shot for shot until you either drop out or pass out.”

Dean wasn’t the slightest bit worried about his angel when the alcohol started pouring. There was no second guessing who would be standing at the finish line. When the third contestant, a lean but built young man, had to rush off to the bathroom, it was only Castiel and the Mountain Biker left. When the bartender cleared the counter of their shot glasses, Castiel smoothed his hand over the wood appreciatively while the Biker rubbed his forehead.

“All right there, Matty?”

“No one…” The Biker slurred. “…calls me ‘Matty’ and gets…away with it…”

Castiel tilted his head to one side. “Is that so?”

“Next round, guys.” Dinah announced, pouring them both three shots.

Castiel took his first shot, smooth as silk. Matty hesitated a few seconds before following suit under the watchful gaze of the angel. The moment his shot glass hit the counter, Castiel lifted his second, turning it in his hand for a moment before taking it straight. He cleared his throat, closing his eyes briefly before shaking his head and setting the glass on the counter. Dean blinked for a moment. Castiel couldn’t possibly be having trouble taking those shots. Was he honestly trying to sell the hustle?

It made him both proud and sick that his angel had learned so much from humanity.

Matty grunted in annoyance before wrapping his hand around his second shot, staring at it as if it would be the death of him but dammit, he was not going to surrender to this scrawny son of a bitch. He picked it up, leaning his head back to take it and just like that, he leaned too far back and the stool slid out from under him. The tables trembled when his weight hit the floor and he didn’t move. The crowd whooped and money exchanged hands as bets were collected on.

Castiel just smiled sweetly at the bartender. “Do I win?”

Minus Castiel’s bill, their winnings came to just over $900. One of Matty’s buddies paid them the $100 he owed them and a few of the bar’s patrons came over to give Castiel a portion of their own winnings for betting on him. Dean collected it all with a broad grin while Castiel leaned against his shoulder, his eyes half-closed and no one said a word.

It wasn’t until they were heading out to the Impala, Castiel with an arm draped over Dean’s shoulders and Dean supporting him with an arm around his waist, that the night started to turn sour.

“HEY!”

They both turned and Dean cursed at the sight of the Mountain Biker Matty stumbling towards them. Castiel stepped forward, pushing Dean back and he rose to meet the biker despite the other man having a full foot and easily 150 pounds on him.

“You cheated, you cheated somehow…can’t no one outdrink me…” The man slurred.

“Perhaps you should seek a life outside of alcoholic binges,” Castiel suggested and the man’s brow furrowed as he tried to understand what Castiel had said and decided it was an insult.

“You little…”

Dean stepped forward quickly between the two.

“Hey, you need to back off, big guy. We won fair and square, just hobble on back to your posse and let’s call this a night.”

“Dean…”

“Outta the way.”

Dean didn’t see the punch coming, only felt pain explode in the side of his face and heard Castiel’s angry shout. His world rolled and he coughed in the dirt, his vision spinning and by the time he righted himself, Matty was crawling on his hands and knees, trying to escape the avenging angel that stood over him. Blood dripping from his broken mouth, his nose bent out of shape and he held his ribs awkwardly.

Castiel stood perfectly still, one fist still raised, his body visibly trembling with the effort of holding himself back.

“How…how dare you…strike… _my Dean._ ”

Castiel took another step towards the retreating man and Dean hurriedly got to his feet.

“Cas…Cas, don’t. Come on, let’s go.”

Castiel looked back at him and Dean watched the fight fade out of him. He let Dean pull him back to the car but he didn’t relax, not even when they were on the road speeding back towards the motel. They drove for nearly half an hour before Castiel let out a slow breath.

“Pull over.” Castiel commanded roughly and Dean nodded, pulling over at the first side road he saw and parking out of sight of any nighttime drivers.

“Out.”

Dean shoved himself out of the car, his vision still fuzzy from the blow but in an instant, Castiel was at his side, drawing his hand over Dean’s face and healing the pain away. He blinked as the swelling faded and Castiel came back into focus. Looking up into those fiery blue eyes, Dean saw the same possessiveness that had been flooding Castiel all night and now there was no one to come between them.

Castiel suddenly surged forward, crushing Dean against the car with his body, his lips furious against Dean’s and his hand fell on Dean’s jaw, pulling his mouth open for his own tongue. Dean whimpered under the forceful kiss, barely able to keep up with the angel. He gave a short cry when he felt Castiel’s hand between his legs, stroking him roughly through the fabric the way Castiel knew he liked it.

“Do you know what you do to me?” Castiel groaned huskily against his ear. “Every day, every minute, every hour…I can see inside you, hear your heartbeat, blood rushing, see your thoughts and hear how much you want me even when we can’t and I want you so badly I can’t see straight but I have to hold back.”

“Cas…” Dean breathed, holding tightly to the angel’s shoulders.

“I see them look at you, women and men, and I want them to know you’re mine. All mine. I want you to know how you make me feel, how empty I feel without you inside me. I want you to feel me inside you, to feel what you make me feel.”

Dean’s eyes widened slightly when he realized what Castiel was saying. Not that the thought hadn’t crossed his mind, it _had_ , probably more than he was willing to admit. And if there was anyone that he’d want to with…

“Stop thinking.” Castiel commanded and Dean swallowed hard before nodding.

“’Kay,” he ground out roughly as Castiel started jerking him out of his jeans. Castiel usually took care undressing him but either the alcohol or the desperate lust was making him careless. He pushed Dean’s shirt up, not even bothering to pull it fully off before he descended on Dean’s chest with his mouth, biting and sucking hard to leave red marks like wounds over the smooth skin. All Dean could do was pant and groan beneath the angel, sliding his hands through Castiel’s hair as his pants and boxers fell around his ankles.

Castiel’s clothes just faded away and his hand was firm around Dean’s cock, stroking him fast and rough and Dean’s hips rolled against him, thrusting. It was perfect, just how Castiel knew he liked it, and it was too much, too soon.

“Cas, what are you…Cas, you have to stop, I…I’m gonna…stop, I’m gonna _CAS!”_

Cas pressed them tightly together so Dean’s orgasm spurted over their stomachs and Dean watched through half-lidded eyes as Castiel methodically scooped it all up in his hand. Dean took a second to weakly jerk his shirt off, tossing it somewhere behind him before Castiel’s voice sent a shiver through him.

“Spread.”

Dean meekly kicked off his boots and jeans so he could spread his legs wide and Castiel slid an arm under his hip, lifting him off the ground so his only support was the angel that had him pressed back against the door of the Impala. Castiel’s arm was firm around his hip, holding him in place as he dipped his hand between Dean’s legs. He slid his hand, slick with Dean’s semen, down the crack of his ass and over his entrance. Dean immediately clenched in protest, his love for Castiel having to fight through years of deep-seated instinct but Castiel just murmured soft Enochian against his throat, sliding a wet finger over the tight ring of muscle until Dean relaxed against him again.

Castiel shifted his hips so he could bear Dean’s weight against the car, Dean’s legs hooked around his waist and he brought his hand to Dean’s cock, distracting him with light strokes over the overly sensitive flesh. He waited until Dean was bucking against his hand once again before pressing against the tight flesh, slipping a single finger inside.

Dean immediately froze, his hips shifting as he forced himself not to shy away but to take and accept the new sensation, his face a flurry of emotions and Castiel waited, slowing his strokes until Dean started to bliss out again.

It was very odd, having something in his ass, but as Castiel began to pulse his finger in and out in rhythm with the strokes on his cock, Dean decided it wasn’t a bad odd. Just odd. Castiel pressed a little deeper, searching for something with a crook of his finger, and Dean barely had enough thought left to realize what he was searching for before Castiel found his prostate.

“CAS!” Dean screamed, his body arching off the car and Castiel smirked, taking the opportunity to add a second finger. Dean didn’t have time to flinch against the new pain before Castiel ground his fingers roughly against his prostate and Dean came hard, clenching around Castiel’s fingers as he painted his own stomach for the second time.

“Damn, Cas, when did you turn me into a teenager?” Dean gasped, shuddering against the pleasure-pain. Castiel just looked down at him lustfully, his pupils dilated so that there was barely a thin ring of blue shining in the darkness. Dean realized Castiel now had _three_ fingers seated inside him, gently sliding in and out, the new pleasure rocking his frazzled nerves, already earning a few jumps from his eager cock as his toes curled.

This time Dean didn’t let his head fall back, he didn’t look away. He _couldn’t_ look away from the heated gaze Castiel had fixed him with and Dean suddenly wanted nothing more than to feel the angel inside him, to feel how Castiel felt when he filled him up.

“Do it, Cas. Tired of your fingers, I want your dick.”

Castiel smirked and despite his words, Dean groaned at the loss of the pressure inside him. Luckily, Castiel was eager to give him something else to fill him up. Dean froze again when he felt the tip of Castiel’s cock against his entrance and Castiel paused, again whispering those soothing words of Enochian until Dean relaxed against him once more. Dean slid his arms over Castiel’s shoulders, his thighs tight around the angel’s hips.

“It will help to bear down on me.” Castiel instructed and Dean nodded, his eyes fluttering closed.

Unable to speak around the lump in his throat but knowing Castiel would hear, he thought hard. _I trust you, Castiel._

Castiel whined softly and then he was pressing in and Dean bit back a cry, focusing on bearing down as Castiel had said. It fucking _hurt_ but damn him if he wasn’t going to take it like a man. He had never in his life paid attention to just how big Castiel was but now he wished he had because it felt like forever, Castiel splitting him open.

“Fuck, is it in yet?” Dean gasped through gritted teeth and groaned at Castiel’s heavy “Almost.”

One more good push and Castiel was fully seated inside him and Dean moaned in relief as Castiel’s grace flowed over him, setting his nerves off with those feather-pricks of pleasure even as they chased away the pain. Momentarily flaccid from the pain, Dean felt his cock jerk back to life when Castiel dragged his wings over his legs and Dean whined, shifting his hips automatically in response which in turn shifted the angle at which Castiel was seated inside him. He heard Castiel groan and his eyes flashed open to catch the look of barely contained lust on the angel’s face.

Castiel slid an arm around his waist, holding him up as he slowly started to pulse inside him, his thrusts short and easy as Dean decided this was definitely pleasant, definitely something he could get used to, and then it was as if someone flicked a switch inside his brain.

“FUCK yes, Cas, I love it, love your cock, _fuuuuuu_ CK me hard-ER, Cas! Harder! Go deep, wanna feel you in my goddamn _throat_ , godDAMN IT CAS FUCK ME!”

For once, Castiel didn’t say a damn thing about his blaspheming, only shifted his hips to give Dean exactly what he asked for. Each thrust slammed their hips together and Dean could feel the bruises forming, feel the way each thrust drove him up against the Impala, the metal digging into his back and he didn’t _care_ because damn it felt so good.

He reached up blindly for Castiel’s wing, finding it through instinct and experience even though he couldn’t see it and Castiel groaned his name when he fisted his fingers in the feathers there. Dean didn’t even have to open his eyes to see the light pulsing in Castiel’s wings, shimmering beneath his skin. He heard the groan of metal and laughed as he realized the entire _car_ was rocking, side to side, with Castiel’s thrusts.

Castiel adjusted his angle and suddenly Dean’s head fell back against the roof of the car, his heels digging into Castiel’s lower back as he screamed himself hoarse, Castiel brutalizing his prostate with every thrust. Castiel just barely had to touch his cock before Dean came for the third time, his body shuddering and he smiled, forcing his eyes open to see the look on Castiel’s face as he clenched erratically around him.

“Dean!” Castiel panted in his ear and Dean’s smile grew. He tightened his grip on Castiel’s wing, pulling and pinching the feathers against the grain in the way he knew Castiel loved. Castiel didn’t disappoint, his hips finally losing their rhythm and Dean braced himself for his final orgasm that never failed to come alongside Castiel’s. He forcefully kept his eyes open, determined to watch Castiel come undone.

Castiel came with a strangled shout, burying himself deep in Dean as light and energy burst out from his wings and it was so much more than Dean expected, the fury of his own orgasm coupled with the heavenly burn inside him that he couldn’t keep his eyes open when the whiteout came, try as he might. For the first time since being with Castiel, he welcomed the bottoming out weightless sensation that came with the world of white light, here where he wasn’t weighed down by his humanity and he could lay next to Castiel, the child of light and fire, and not burn.

He almost wept when he came back to his body, limply trapped between Castiel and the Impala. Castiel’s wings were spread out above them and he watched lazily as light flickered between the feathers, shining with iridescence and he realized it was raining, the water running in rivulets down Castiel’s wings to drip over their heated skin.

“Dean…” Castiel breathed and there was something in his voice that made him look down at his angel. He realized Castiel’s hand lay over his shoulder where the angel had marked him so very long ago but Castiel’s hand fell there so often during sex that it didn’t surprise him anymore.

What surprised him was that his hand was resting on Castiel’s shoulder and the skin was steaming beneath his hand. He yelped and Castiel moaned when he jerked his hand away, a matching red handprint marking the angel’s shoulder.

“The hell?…Dammit, Cas, I’m sorry…how?”

“It was your soul, reaching out to me. That was the first time you gave in, letting your soul touch my grace.” Castiel shook his head, smiling at his shoulder. No, it was more than smiling. He was practically glowing and Dean looked at him curiously. “You have…completed the mark.”

Then Dean laughed despite his confusion, wrapping his arms tightly around his angel. “Mine.”

Castiel laughed lightly against his neck, giddy and still shuddering with pleasure. “Always.”

-


	4. The Kids Are All Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean finally discovers Gabriel and Sam's new "relationship."

* * *

“I love you, Cas.”

It was the first thing either of them had said for hours. The car was still parked on the dirt road but Dean and Castiel were a half dozen yards away, stretched out on a blanket beneath the stars. Never in his life had Dean thought he could be so utterly at peace with the world but if there was danger, Castiel would sense it long before he did. And the angel was stretched out over his chest, eyes half-lidded. They hadn’t even bothered getting dressed and even though the night was chill, Castiel’s wings were warm.

He still felt a bit sore from the night’s earlier activities and even as he thought about it, he felt Castiel stiffen beside him. The angel had apologized profusely when he’d sobered up, horrified that he’d hurt Dean. Dean had spent a good ten minutes explaining the difference between a ‘good’ hurt and a ‘bad’ hurt and that Castiel didn’t have to waste his grace healing the ‘good’ hurts.

Especially not when they held reminders of something so incredibly awesome, and at that Castiel relaxed once again. Dean almost laughed, slowly getting used to the fact that Castiel could pick up on his train of thoughts as easily as breathing.

Castiel lifted his head when Dean spoke though, tilted his head onto his hand as he looked at Dean. Dean rolled his eyes, pushing the angel’s shoulder lightly.

“Come on, don’t leave me hanging.”

Castiel laughed lightly and Dean knew that he didn’t say those three words often. Hell, he could never say them enough to convey how he felt about Castiel but Castiel knew, he always knew.

“I love you, Dean Winchester.” And Dean felt a weight lift off his chest as Castiel placed a hand beside his head, lifting himself up to brush their lips together. “I always have. I always will.”

Dean let his hand fall over the angry red handprint on Castiel’s shoulder and the angel’s wings rustled in approval. Castiel lay back against his chest and curled up against his side.

“’Always?’” Dean repeated, his thoughts on the early days when he’d look at Castiel with less trust than you show a homeless man begging for food. Now that he thought about it, Castiel had always looked at him like he was starving and Dean was edible. Castiel smiled at him, his eyes soft and forgiving.

“At the beginning, it wasn’t what a human would call ‘love’ exactly though that is the closest word you have to describe it. From the moment I saw your soul in the Pit, I felt the need to have you with me always, to protect you and worship you as you deserved but did not receive. Even then, I rebelled against Heaven though I did not do so consciously, for I cared more about your safety than my orders. When I reached you, I wrapped your soul in my grace and carried you out.”

“I was inside you?”

“More or less,” Castiel answered softly, tracing slow circles over his chest. “It was the safest way to pull you out. It also allowed me to heal the tears in your soul. I carried you out of Hell and to your body. I rebuilt you, cell by cell, and removing you from my grace and placing you inside your body was the hardest thing I believe I have ever done.”

“…really? All you’ve done and that was the hardest?”

Castiel looked up at him earnestly and Dean almost shivered beneath the weight of his gaze. He would never ever get used to the way Castiel’s eyes could see right through him, stripping him until he was bare and exposed. But he had come to know that even if he was naked to Castiel, Castiel was a barrier between him and the world that nothing could or would ever get past.

“Yes,” Castiel finished with a smile. “Ripping your soul out of me was agony and I never wanted to let you go. From that moment, I felt so empty without you. I was always drawn to you, I could never be gone from your side long and when I was in the same room, it was almost physically impossible not to be as near to you as I could possibly be. Or as close as you allowed me.”

A fresh wave of guilt fell over him as he remembered the times he’d pushed Castiel away, cursing the angel’s lack of understanding of personal space. Now he understood, understood the weighted looks, the way Castiel would always appear right behind him, not out of lack of understanding but out of a desperate need to be closer to him.

“I should’ve known,” Dean said gruffly and Castiel rolled to straddle him, laying flat over his chest.

“There was no way you could’ve understood then, Dean. If anything, it might’ve led you to hesitate to trust me. Knowing I couldn’t help myself around you.”

“Yeah, well…” Dean traced the mark on Castiel’s shoulder, the angel watching him curiously. “Maybe then you wouldn’t have had to wait so long for me to figure out that I loved you.”

Castiel laughed and Dean blushed at the soft, musical sound. He made a solemn oath to himself that he would make Castiel laugh more. He leaned up to peck Castiel’s lips, his hand sliding over the new mark on the angel’s shoulder.

“What did you mean when you said I ‘completed the mark’?”

“I was hoping you’d ask me that.” Castiel purred warmly and Dean looked up in surprise.

“Well?”

“In Heaven, angels mate for life. In the heat of their initial consummation, their grace combines and when they separate, each bears the mark of the other to show ownership. This mark…” Castiel brushed his fingertips very lightly over Dean’s shoulder. “…is not from where I pulled you from the Pit but rather, from where I removed you from my grace. In essence, it was not even me that marked you. My grace saw you and knew you as its mate and so marked you as such. Just as it truly was not you that marked me but rather your soul reached out and marked my grace, completing the cycle.”

Dean listened raptly to Castiel’s explanation, trying to fathom that his soul and Castiel’s grace were acting outside of their control to reach each other.

“…that’s one hell of a ‘profound bond,’ Cas…” Dean whispered and Castiel smiled, nodding as he traced the mark on Dean’s shoulder.

“These marks are simply physical representations of the ones that bind us on a much deeper level.” Castiel finished, looking up at Dean for his reaction. “They can heal or fade but the marks on your soul and my grace are eternal.”

“So…” Dean said after a long pause, touching Castiel’s shoulder. “…this tells every angel that you’re mine?”

Castiel laughed lightly. “Yes, Dean, if they don’t know already. Our relationship is both…infamous and popular in Heaven.”

Dean grinned at that, shaking his head before pulling Castiel down for a kiss. He let his forehead rest against Castiel’s, signaling the angel in what had become a common practice between them. Dean welcomed the feel of Castiel’s grace in his mind, letting Castiel see what he often had trouble putting into words.

“Mmm…” Castiel purred against the wanton stream of Dean’s thoughts, agreeing with them as quickly as they poured through. “Yes, yours. Always. Love you too.”

Dean smiled, pressing his lips against Castiel’s for a long moment before sighing.

“We should probably head back.”

He felt Castiel stiffen and frowned, leaning back. “What’s wrong?”

Castiel shifted nervously, his blue eyes not quite meeting Dean’s. “Sam…has company.”

Dean grinned, his eyes sparkling. “Good. He was eyeing that hot chick at the bar, was it her?”

“….no.” Castiel said quietly and Dean found himself frowning, sliding his arms up Castiel’s back but even the shudder that rippled through the angel’s wings didn’t quiet the displeasure in Castiel’s eyes.

“What’s wrong, Cas?”

Cas suddenly dropped his head, clinging to Dean and hiding his face in his neck.

“Sam doesn’t want to tell you and he’ll be mad if I say but I don’t want to keep things from you and then you will be mad at me, I can’t, I can’t handle that, I can’t…please.”

Dean’s gaze hardened and he growled angrily. “Sam shouldn’t have put you in that position…”

Castiel’s head snapped right back up. “No! No, he didn’t ask me not to say anything, I can just feel his apprehension. He’s afraid of what you will think, since Ruby…”

Instantly, Castiel knew he’d said the wrong thing as something flashed in Dean’s eyes and his grip tightened around the angel’s waist. When he spoke, his voice was carefully measured as he tried not to take out his anger towards his brother on his boyfriend.

“Cas…tell me who my brother is fucking.”

Castiel still cowered and Dean softened, brushings his fingers through Castiel’s hair.

“Tell me. Please.”

Castiel sighed slowly, leaning into his touch.

“Gabriel.”

* * *

Sam was dozing in and out despite Gabriel’s less than considerate commentary on Night of the Living Dead. The archangel’s chest made a fabulous pillow and the buzz of energy humming from his skin kept Sam warm despite the fact that he was completely naked and the nearest blanket was a good four feet away.

He’d blink every time Gabriel would move or complain about some grave inconsistency in the movie before burrowing back into the angel’s chest, Gabriel’s arm draped over his back. Suddenly, he felt the archangel stiffen then he laughed drily.

“Hurricane Dean is land-bound. I’m out.”

And just like that, Sam face-planted into the pillows Gabriel had been laying on. He sighed, shaking his head before the full force of Gabriel’s words hit him.

Dean was coming.

Dean was upset.

Dean _knew._

Sam pushed himself up onto his hands and his first attempt to stand failed, his legs too weak to carry him just yet. Everything Gabriel had brought had disappeared with him but his clothes were across the room, draped across the table. Even the nearest blanket was too far away.

He heard the Impala screech to a stop outside and he cast about desperately one last time. At the last possible second, he grabbed the still warm pillow and laid it over his lap as Dean burst in the door.

“Where is he? I’m going to be his sparkly ass back to Heaven and then some.” Dean growled, taking in his brother’s state of undress and the empty bedroom in one look before storming past to the bathroom, nearly knocking the door of the hinges in his efforts to find Gabriel.

“He’s not here, Dean,” Sam tried to placate as Castiel came in quietly.

“I’m sorry, Sam, he asked me and I had to tell him.”

“It’s okay,” Sam immediately soothed Castiel as the angel brought him his clothes and sat down on the bed across from him. “I would’ve never asked you to lie for me.”

That got Dean to slow from his furious searching of the room, coming to stand at the edge of the bed and looking from one to the other. Sam steeled himself for the inevitable fall out.

_You’re gay, Sam? When were you going to tell me? So you like dudes? How long? Why, Sam?_

“Why Gabriel?”

Sam sighed. “I’ve always pref…wait, what?”

“Why. Gabriel.” Dean repeated with all the patience of an erupting volcano.

“That’s what you want to know, why Gabriel? That’s it? That’s your reaction?”

“What were you expecting?” Dean snapped.

“I don’t know, after all the years you’ve spent gay-bashing me, I was pretty sure it’d be something along those lines.” Sam sighed, exasperated. He wanted to pace and vent like Dean was but he couldn’t move without flashing them both.

Castiel lifted his head and Sam was instantly fully dressed. He gave Castiel a silent look of thanks before standing, turning to face his brother and Dean just leveled him with a sad look.

“Dude…have you seen my boyfriend lately? Do I need to _repeat_ that? My _boyfriend._ I don’t have any room to gay-bash you anymore. I just want to know…out of all the guys in the world, why _Gabriel?_ ”

Sam stared back at his brother, stunned, before he shook his head and laughed lightly.

“Dean, tell me. Back before Castiel, what exactly were your criteria for picking up a woman?”

Behind him, Castiel sighed and Dean glanced to his boyfriend before back to Sam.

“Um…attractiveness? Willingness?”

Sam leveled a look at his brother and realization dawned on Dean. “That’s it?”

“Yeah,” Sam finished with a shrug. “He’s attractive. He’s willing. He’s a good fuck. Right now, that’s all it is.”

Dean nodded slowly, his gaze traveling from his brother to where Castiel sat on the bed, looking down at his hands.

“You okay, Cas?”

Sam glanced over just in time to see sadness in Castiel’s eyes before it was gone behind a smile.

“Of course. I’m glad you are not mad at each other.”

Sam laughed lightly, sitting down next to Castiel and wrapping an arm around the angel’s shoulders.

“We’re brothers. We fight and fuss but we don’t stay mad at each other. That includes you now, for that matter.”

Castiel’s smile could’ve challenged the sun to a show down and he stared up at Sam wondrously for a moment before dropping his eyes back to his hands where they fumbled with nothing in his lap. Dean made as if to sit across from Castiel, realized where and probably _what_ he’d be sitting in, and reversed himself to sit next to the angel, opposite his brother.

“Now what’s wrong?” Sam prompted gently.

“Gabriel tried to explain but…” Castiel shrugged. “…casual sex is so…alien…to me, I’m afraid I simply don’t approve of it. But I will not try and stop you. It would be beyond my means to try and stop Gabriel.”

“What do you mean, ‘alien?’” Sam continued, still wanting to soothe away the angel’s troubles. Besides, it has also gotten Dean’s attention off of himself.

Castiel shrugged again, a tiny smile on his lips. “As I told Dean, angels typically mate for life.”

“Yeah,” Dean scoffed. “But you guys don’t screw around before you mate up?”

“No, Dean,” Castiel laughed. “We don’t. Angels are made in pairs. Every angel has only one mate.”

“What about you then?” Dean said softly. “Don’t you have a mate floating around up there, then?”

“You are my mate.” Castiel said firmly. “You always were and always will be mine. We were made for each other.”

Dean sighed, shaking his head in feigned annoyance but both Castiel and Sam could tell he was pleased.

“Okay, I really need a beer.”

“You need sleep.” Castiel prompted and Dean made a face.

“I’m not sleeping in here.”

“Dean.” Sam protested, staring at his brother incredulously and Dean looked affronted.

“Dude! I’ve been sleeping with an angel longer than you have, I know. They don’t just jizz, they like…light-jizz and there’s energy and stuff. Cas blew the lights out at Bobby’s house the first time so don’t tell me it’s only…over there.” He waved his arms towards Sam’s bed. “I’ll sleep in the car.”

He pushed past them both, still shaking his head and Castiel gave Sam an apologetic look.

“Make sure he stays warm,” Sam said after a long moment and Castiel nodded, slipping out after Dean.

* * *

The next morning, Sam woke to the sound of the shower running which meant Dean had, at the very least, gotten over himself enough to bathe in the hotel room. Castiel was nowhere to be seen, which meant he was probably on a breakfast run or whatever else Castiel did in the mornings.

Dean came out in nothing but a towel and sifted through his bag for clothes to wear. Sam sighed softly, having showered before bed.

“So are you really okay…”

“With you being gay?” Dean finished for him, pulling on his jeans.

“…among other things.” Sam sighed. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but…”

“Dude, I’ve known you were gay for years.”

Now it was Sam’s turn to stare as Dean pulled a well-worn Led Zeppelin shirt over his head.

“You knew?”

Dean turned and smiled, running the towel over his hair. “Blond, skinny, little rough cut in the face, but had a nice ass…for a guy. Yeah, Dad and I saw you kissing him one night we were staking out your dorm.”

“You…and Dad…what did he say?”

“’Stop freaking out and watch the EMF, Dean,’” Dean finished with a laugh.

Silence fell for another minute before Sam smiled. “His name was Rick, he was…one of my regular partners.”

“’Regular partners?’”

“Yeah, I was…” Sam blushed. “…kind of promiscuous. I got around.” He added at the look Dean was giving him for the four-point word. And then rolled his eyes at the split-face grin Dean was giving him.

“Always knew you had it in you, Sammy.”

“And for that matter…” Sam continued, pretending that Dean hadn’t spoken. “I’m not gay, exactly. I’m pansexual.”

“….what?”

“It means I don’t discriminate between gender or identity or sexual preference…” he trailed off, once again caught by Dean’s blank stare. He sought quickly for a pop culture reference that would work with his brother. Dean could be so difficult sometimes. “I am Captain Jack Harkness.”

And the shit-eating grin was back.

“That’s my boy.”

“Oh, shut up, jerkface.”

Dean opened his mouth to respond but Castiel chose that exact moment to return, the table instantly set with two plates full of waffles, eggs, and bacon. A pitcher of orange juice and two glasses sat in the center with a small bowl of butter and a decanter of syrup. Unlike Gabriel’s extravagant buffet, both boys already knew that Castiel had carefully hand-prepared their breakfast, only using his mojo to transport it there.

“I attempted to make muffins but…there was a mishap with the flour. Bobby was upset.”

Dean laughed and pecked Castiel’s lips. “Waffles are better anyway. Muffins are weird.”

“Thanks, Cas.” Sam laughed.

“You are well?” The question was physically directed to Sam but both he and Dean knew it was more of an encompassing query for the two of them.

“Yeah, Cas, we’re cool.” Dean said from the table and Sam touched the angel’s shoulder, warranting a loving look from haunting blue eyes. He was used to Castiel giving Dean those looks but they always felt awkward directed at him.

“We are brothers, Sam.” Castiel explained shortly and suddenly it made sense.

“Right.” Sam laughed. “You’re right. It’s just weird, me being the big brother here…”

Castiel laughed softly. “Yes, it is strange looking up to you.”

His eyes twinkled and Sam laughed out when the double-meaning of Castiel’s words hit him. He clapped the angel on the shoulder, grinning. Dean laughed far louder than either of them.

“Cas, you made a pun! I am so proud!”

Castiel smiled as the two sat down to breakfast, making his way over to what would’ve been Dean’s bed and stretching out.

“I will return in a moment.” He said softly before closing his eyes. His body slowly went still as they watched, his breathing steadied out until it was nearly imperceptible.

“Tuning in to the Angel News Network,” Dean answered Sam’s silent query. “He usually does it when we’re asleep but he says my dreams are starting to interfere with his radar.”

Sam raised an eyebrow and Dean shrugged. “Okay, so it was more detailed than that and took about ten minutes of him rambling for him to finish explaining and all I got out of it was ‘You are distracting me, Dean, so be quiet.’”

Sam laughed, pouring honey over his waffles. They hadn’t been eating for ten minutes before Dean looked up to see Castiel twitching violently.

“That’s never happened before.” He muttered before hurrying to his feet, crossing the room quickly with Sam just behind him. He pulled Castiel to his chest, patting his cheek.

“Cas…Cas! Wake up!”

Castiel opened his eyes, blinking at them for a moment before pressing both hands to his forehead, his face contorted in pain.

“Cas, are you okay?” Sam asked quickly, an arm stretched over the angel’s legs in case the spasms started up again.

Slowly, Castiel nodded. “It was strange. I could hear my brothers and sisters but…I could not understand them. It was painful, listening to them. What I could understand, it felt like I was hearing them through another’s grace instead of my own.”

He shook his head after a moment, Dean still worriedly passing his hand through the angel’s hair. Castiel sighed softly, leaning against the elder hunter. “The pain is gone now. I am not sure what happened.”

“Yeah, well…” Dean started worriedly. “Maybe you should rest today. Bunk out in the back seat.”

Castiel didn’t say anything, his eyes already closed and his breathing steady against Dean’s chest. Dean huffed but Sam grinned at him, knowing that his brother didn’t really mind the angel passing out on him.

“Does this mean I get to drive?”

The ensuing argument ended with Dean asleep in the backseat, Castiel tucked happily against his chest and Sam drove with a soft smile on his face, glancing back at the happy couple.

“Hello Sammy,”

Sam wondered why he wasn’t surprised to see the archangel.

“How did Dean take it?”

“He may punch you the next time he sees you.”

Gabriel laughed softly. “He’ll break his hand.”

“Cas’ll heal it for him.” Sam chuckled. “You probably deserve it…if not for screwing me, then for something else no doubt.”

“Maybe for this,” Gabriel smirked, sliding over the leather seat until their hips were pressed together. Sam hissed when the archangel pressed his lips against the bare skin of his neck, palming his crotch, and glanced hurriedly into the rearview mirror. Dean’s head was lolled back and his mouth wide as he snored lightly. Castiel appeared to be asleep but a knowing smirk had taken over his lips.

It was going to be one long drive.

* * *

Dean woke a couple hours later and extricated himself from Castiel to climb into the front seat. They drove for almost ten minutes in total silence before Dean finally shifted himself awkwardly and sank down in the seat.

“So…”

“So?” Sam responded quietly.

“So…you and Gabriel…really?”

Sam laughed. “I’m still just amazed how cool you’re being about me sleeping with dudes.”

Dean hesitated half a second too long before shrugging. “It’s weird…and before Cas, I’d be freaking out, man. But I don’t really have a leg to stand on anymore. Just…um…dude, how?”

“How what? How did I end up liking guys?” Sam shrugged. “I’ll admit the first couple of times were accidents. One of my roommates was this home-schooled pansy and the other, Rick, was a natural genius with severe ADHD. Rick spent most of his time introducing Liam to the wild side of life and one night I got caught up in it. We got totally and completely wasted, started playing strip poker which I won easily.”

Dean grinned at that.

“Then Liam and Rick decided I had too many clothes on, since they were both naked, and tackled me. They had a tough time of that too but since I’m a happy drunk, I didn’t fight _too_ hard. Next thing I knew, in the middle of it all, I had a boner and Rick just dove in and started sucking me off…”

“DUDE!” Dean yelped. “Spare me the details!”

Sam laughed. “How is this any different than all the times you told me about screwing women? Has Cas been too much of a prude to go down on you or something?”

“I have not.” Castiel announced confidently from the backseat. “From Dean’s usual reaction, I can assume I am quite skilled at such, um…’blowjobs.’”

Sam laughed first at the angel then again at the furious blush crossing his brother’s face. He reached back, offering Castiel an open palm.

“High five, bro.”

“What is a ‘high five?’” Castiel asked curiously, regarding his hand the same way he had when they first met.

“It’s like a clap but between two people.” Sam explained calmly even as Dean rolled his eyes. Castiel looked at him oddly for another moment before meeting his palm with a light slap of his own.

“Nice.” Sam approved, earning a smile from the backseat angel and Dean huffed, sinking in his seat once more.

“So…why?” Dean continued, apparently his morbid curiousity not satisfied yet. “You just like dudes or…and what about Jess?”

Sam grinned wistfully, thinking back to his short time with Jess. “Jess was my Cas.”

Both looked up at that.

“What do you mean?” Castiel inquired softly and Sam’s smile grew.

“Before you, Dean was as straight as they come. You were the exception to the rule. Jess was the same for me. When I was with her…I didn’t want anything else. I was satisfied. She was enough.”

Sam glanced over at Dean to see him nodding, no doubt unconsciously. Sam saw Castiel look over at him and blush and Dean looked back over as Sam had stopped speaking.

“What?” Dean snapped at the look on his brother’s face. Sam laughed lightly.

“Nothing, Dean. Nothing.”

“You still haven’t answered why.”

“I like dick.”

Dean choked and Castiel and Sam both laughed out, Sam looking back quickly to catch that rare moment of pure joy cascading over Castiel’s face. Sam shook his head, still laughing softly as Dean glared at him.

“Seriously,” he continued after a moment. “After so many years of fighting and having to be in total control of my body and my mind…giving up control to someone else just felt so good, so right, and I craved more of it. It was easier to get that kind of dominance from men than from women, so I rolled with that. And that’s the truth.”

“Huh.” Dean said shortly, looking out the window once again. In the backseat, Castiel shifted to the middle seat, leaning slightly forward to compensate for his wings.

“I need to stretch my wings.” He announced after a moment before vanishing from the back seat. Sam watched as Dean glanced up then relaxed against the seat, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. Sam drove on for a little while before swallowing, gearing himself up for what he was about to say.

“I hope you get to feel that one day.”

Dean glanced up and over at him. “Feel what?”

“You obviously trust Cas so…let him have control one time. It’s really…really incredible to have someone you trust that much.”

Sam glanced over at Dean even as his brother looked away, the tell-tale clench in his jaw obvious. “Wait…you already have?”

“Have what?” Dean played oblivious.

“BOTTOMED!” Sam half-shouted. “You bottomed for Cas! I can’t…did you like it? Was it good? Well, obviously, those two kinda go hand in hand…”

“DUDE! You are _such_ a _girl!”_ Dean made some sound somewhere between an indignant shout and an embarrassed squeak. “We are so not talking about this.”

Sam squirmed in his seat, caught up in his excitement for his brother and said brother’s unwillingness to discuss a matter as simple as sex. After a few minutes, however, Dean sighed at his obvious eagerness.

“Yeah, it was good. I liked it. Hell of a lot more than I thought I would but…you’re right. Letting go, letting Cas take over and not having to worry about anything even if it was just for a moment…it was pretty friggin’ incredible.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Already did,” Dean grinned and Sam laughed, glad to have his brother back.

“That, um….at the end…when Cas comes, do you…”

“…yeah…”

“…and the whiteout?”

“Yeah, Cas says it has something to do with his true form showing through in that…moment…”

“Dean, that could be dangerous.”

Dean scoffed, shaking his head. “If it were, I’d be dead already.”

Sam shook his head, laughing. “Good thing Cas is an angel. I’m not sure if he could keep your urges satisfied otherwise.”

“Remember that next time you let Gabriel jerk you off in my car.”

-


	5. Calm Before The Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel confesses to Sam that Castiel is more than he appears.

It was the fact that he was acting just like Dean that made Gabriel think twice about putting down the bottle in his hand. Here he was, drowning his sorrow in holy water just like a good ole’ human being. Dad would be proud, he thought. After all this time…

* * *

_“There you are, Gabriel. You’re late.”_

_“Yeah, the kid’s a handful.” Gabriel shrugged as he sauntered in to lounge near his brothers. Michael and Raphael both stood and fixed him with annoyed looks. “What’s this super-secret-archangel meeting all about, Mikey?”_

_Michael fixed him with a glare for the nickname and Gabriel shrugged. He’d been made to interact with humans and he took so much after them after observing the beginnings of their existence. It was a fascinating subject to him but exasperating to his brothers._

_“We are discussing the Enochian prophecies. Now that Lucifer has fallen, we must treat the remainder as if they will also prove to be true.” Raphael said shortly as was his way._

_Raphael was the warrior, the final hand in judgment for all of Father’s enemies. Himself, Gabriel, he was the messenger, the forerunner. He paved the path for Raphael. Michael gave the orders and Lucifer was supposed to be the closer, the one who restored order in their wake. Of course, now that role would fall to…_

_“Where is he, Gabriel?” Michael asked shortly and Gabriel scoffed._

_“He’s five, Michael. He’s not five hundred, not five thousand, not even fifty, no; he’s five…five years old. The only thing he’d get out of this Round Table thing you’ve got going on is bored.”_

_“He should be here.”_

_Gabriel snorted. “Then go fetch him. I left him making cloud castles in the rain fields.”_

_The look Michael gave him was one of utter annoyance and immeasurable patience._

_“It will be up to you to relate to him the details of this discussion.”_

_“Of course, bro. As soon as he’s old enough to, you know, care.”_

* * *

Gabriel tilted his head at the empty bottle in his hand before stretching his wings out above him. He was tired and it had been harder and harder lately to keep up the façade that everything was okay. Part of him knew he could if he wanted, just disappear again, restart his life as the Trickster, but he’d developed a fondness for this life. It had been five months since he and Sam had started their wayward tryst and Dean and Castiel had been together for nearly an entire year. Earth time, that was. For him and Castiel, it was the turn of another century.

He stood on one of the lesser known peaks south of Everest, stretching his wings out fully above him. He could go one way and forget that any of this had ever happened. Forget that he was the last archangel with even a speck of his powers left. Forget all the responsibility that fell to him, the responsibility of raising the next in line. But he wouldn’t.

For now, he would swear it was out of boredom that he stretched his wings and flew to the United States.

He found the Winchesters camping out at Bobby and flitted down to join them, appearing next to Sam where he lay stretched out against the windshield of a junker, shirtless in the summer sun.

“Hey there, Samsquatch.”

Sam smiled at him affectionately, not even the slightest bit put off by his sudden appearance.

“Hey, pipsqueak.”

Gabriel grinned, lighting tapping Sam on the shoulder for the jab. “How’s the happy couple?”

He gestured over to where Dean and Castiel were apparently attempting to wash the Impala, Dean shirtless like his brother while Castiel wore a clearly borrowed AC/DC shirt and shorts that were too big and barely clung to his hips. They appeared to be spending more time throwing soapy water at each other than actually washing the car though. As he watched, Dean turned the hose on Castiel, the angel laughing brightly as he tried to defend himself.

“Happy,” Sam answered warmly. “I haven’t seen Dean this happy in years.”

“Same for Castiel,” Gabriel replied without thinking, the holy water loosening his tongue. “He’s been out of his depth so long…it’s good to see him doing what he was born to do.”

Sam sat up slightly, not quite realizing that Gabe was drunk and talking about things he shouldn’t. “What do you mean?”

Gabriel smiled, leaning back to fall against Sam’s chest, running his hand over the bare muscles appreciatively. “Cas was never meant to be a soldier. He’s what we in Heaven like to call a Keeper. They’re a small but elite group that follow up behind the wrathful and avenging angels and bring about the peace and order that is usually promised. This…this is what Cas always should’ve been.”

“What happened? Why didn’t he?” Sam twitched when Gabriel’s hand brushed over a ticklish spot and he nudged Gabriel back to safer areas of his torso.

“Michael reassigned him after I left.” Gabriel shrugged, placing a soft kiss above Sam’s navel.

“Why?” Sam asked quietly, playing with the ends of Gabriel’s hair.

Gabriel frowned, lifting his head and looking with barely guarded affection to where Castiel had now wrestled Dean onto the hood of the Impala, pressing him down against the metal with his own weight, kissing him fiercely. It was a sign of how far he and Dean had come that Dean allowed this in full view of his brother, letting Castiel kneel between his thighs and simply wrapping his legs around the angel’s waist, pulling him down hungrily.

“I have no idea.” Gabriel lied slowly, deliberately. “Michael’s a dick. He probably did it out of boredom. Or maybe he saw something in Cassie no one else did. Cas was a prodigy when it came to fighting, after all. Was leading his own garrison before most angels even grow into their wings.”

Sam’s brow furrowed in confusion, remembering how Castiel had fought the night Zachariah had them pinned in the storage unit. He was an incredible fighter and was always the first one to place himself in danger. Sam had always assumed it was because it was who Castiel was meant to be. Cas himself had quite bluntly informed Dean he was a warrior, not a fairy godmother.

_Cas was never meant to be a soldier._

Looking at Dean and Castiel now, Sam had to agree. No matter how good of a soldier Castiel was, bringing peace and order to Dean’s life…this was what he was meant to be. This was _where_ he was meant to be.

“Gabriel.”

Castiel was suddenly in front of them, Dean taking the slower route over to give Gabriel time to adjust from lavishing Sam’s chest with attention. Gabriel frowned at his brother and the look Castiel gave in return wasn’t one of annoyance as it was usually, but rather resignation. Even Dean didn’t look too upset at Gabriel’s appearance. Maybe Dean was slowly getting used to Gabriel being around and Sam had noticed he almost constantly teased him about his ‘boyfriend.’ The teasing didn’t bother him, it just meant Dean was back to normal. What bothered him was how much he was beginning to want Gabriel to fit that description.

“Gabriel,” Castiel started again, looking not quite at Gabriel but rather above and beyond him, as if looking at something just over his shoulder.

Oh.

“Gabriel, your wings are filthy. How could you let them get to such a state?” Castiel chastised.

“Well, bro, you see…my brother, who is the first angel I’ve spoken to in a couple millennia, got himself a new boyfriend and hasn’t bothered to notice my wings look like shit. Kinda weird, especially since his are so…sparkly clean.”

“Why is it Cas’ fault your wings look like shit?” Dean admonished and Gabriel glared at him.

“You try washing your back when you have six additional limbs not only blocking you but trying to belt you over the head.” Gabriel muttered as Castiel climbed onto the roof of the car behind them, nudging Sam lightly.

“You should probably get down.”

Sam took his advice and jumped down and Castiel reached forward, dragging Gabriel by the shoulder up onto the roof in front of him. When he was situated, he thwacked Gabriel on the back of the head. “Wings out.”

Gabriel glared but closed his eyes, concentrating as Sam joined his brother on the ground. The next second, the heat caved as the very sun was blocked out above them, Gabriel’s wings casting a massive shadow over the ground.

“Holy shit,” he heard Dean breathe and Sam almost repeated the exclamation.

He remembered seeing Castiel’s wings in the panic room, how the bright white, somehow liquid wings had filled every space, every spare corner of the room. Gabriel’s wings, even as Castiel spread his wings out behind them, dwarfed everything in the near vicinity.

From the base to the first joint, they were a deep mahogany, glistening with gold in the sunlight. From there, they tapered down to a deep tawny before finally reaching a soft iridescent fawn at the tips. Every inch of them seemed to glow and flutter but as he stared, Sam could see what Castiel had noticed. A good deal of the feathers were pinched and rolled the wrong way, most appeared to have lost their sheen and just generally gave the whole thing a vast unkempt appearance especially compared to Castiel’s wings, the bright white profoundly immaculate.

Also, Gabriel had six wings compared to Castiel’s two. The main pair was easily as big as Castiel’s, the central pair only slightly smaller. The lower pair was about a third of the size of the main pair and even when the top two were spread, they remained slightly tucked against Gabriel’s back. Something about this made Castiel chuckle and he gently coaxed the lower pair to spread as well with gentle fingertips. At this slight touch, Gabriel’s wings folded forward so the vessel was barely visible beyond the wall of feathers and Castiel tucked his wings forward as well, just brushing over Gabriel’s main pair.

Suddenly, Castiel’s eyes went wide with surprise. “Oh…”

Gabriel smiled sheepishly. “…yeah…”

Castiel swallowed nervously and laid a hand over his shoulder where underneath the thin t-shirt, his mark lay burned into his skin. He then nodded. “Good thing I have Dean then.”

Below, Dean leaned against a nearby car as Castiel once again pressed his wings against Gabriel’s, his feathers ruffling softly as his hands smoothed over the base of the central pair. Sam glanced at his brother, noticing the tight clench of his jaw. When Gabriel gave a soft moan, a vein twitched in Dean’s forehead.

“Cas…” Dean snapped. “What the Hell?”

Castiel looked up in surprise at Dean’s tone and opened his mouth to reply but Gabriel beat him to it.

“Curb your jealous hormones, Dean-o, it’s not what you think.”

“You guys are rubbing dicks, what am I supposed to think?” Dean huffed and Gabriel laughed, shaking his head even as Castiel flushed crimson.

“It’s not like that, moron. First of all, Cas only gets wing-rections for you. Literally the moment you touched his wings, he became completely, physically incapable of being sexually stimulated by another being.”

Sam would eat his firstborn if Dean didn’t look absolutely thrilled at that thought.

“Second of all, this is closer to a back rub than a hand job, Romeo.”

Castiel smiled sheepishly at Dean. “I’m just smoothing his feathers, Dean. You have nothing to worry about.”

Sam watched Castiel catch Dean’s gaze and lift his hand to his shoulder. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dean do the same, covering the red handprint with his own. Then Dean nodded, walking over to the cooler to fetch a beer. It was, oddly, his first one of the day and the sun was just beginning to set.

“Ow!”

“It was broken, Gabriel.”

“You could’ve warned me.”

Sam looked over in time to see Castiel toss one of Gabriel’s feathers to the side, the feather turning into a thing of fallen beauty and light for a brief second before it turned to ash on the ground. Sam felt a sudden loss, even though Gabriel didn’t seem bothered, reaching back to smack Castiel on the back of the head with his wing. Castiel flicked his ear in retaliation and Sam couldn’t help but laugh. It was the first time he’d ever seen two angels actually act like brothers.

“There,” Castiel murmured nearly an hour later.

Gabriel jumped to his feet, spreading his now glistening wings and Castiel leaned back, obviously pleased with his handiwork. While Sam thought Gabriel’s wings looked magnificent before, they now glowed with his grace, every inch of them evanescent with light and color.

“Man,” Gabriel breathed. “I forgot how good it felt to have clean wings. How much faster…hey, race you to Pluto?”

Castiel eyed him warily. “I don’t see how racing _you_ is fair. You’ve also been known to cheat.”

“Says the best strategist in the garrison,” Gabriel scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, hop to the challenge.”

“You can take him, Cas.” Dean said firmly as he rejoined the group, having been working on the Impala’s engine for the better part of the hour. “Leave his sparkly ass in the stardust.”

Castiel met Gabriel’s gaze with a challenging look and Gabriel grinned. “3…2…1…”

Both angels vanished and the down surge from their wings blew over Dean and Sam, forcing them back a few steps. Less than a minute later, Castiel dropped onto the roof of a nearby car, wings and hair steaming. Three seconds later, Gabriel landed nearby.

“Okay, how the _hell_ did you beat me?”

Castiel shook his head, grinning, as Dean jogged over to him. Droplets of ice still embedded in his hair went flying.

“Your wings are far larger than mine and weighed you down on reentry. I flew in your wake for the lack of wind resistance and then didn’t open my wings upon return until the last possible nanosecond.”

“Best strategist…” Gabriel rolled his eyes, shaking his wings to fluff them dry. “Got my ass handed to me by a pre-pubescent angel.”

Dean choked even as Castiel scoffed. “Don’t start with that again.”

“P-prepubescent?” Dean stuttered and Castiel rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you pedophile!” Gabriel laughed. “Cas here hasn’t even grown into his wings yet!”

Castiel snorted, stretching and fluffing his wings as if proving a point. “My wings are perfectly suited to my form and I no longer care if they change color.”

“What are you…”

Castiel sighed. “When an angel reaches maturity, their wings change from white to another color, usually one that suits their personality or, more rarely, their purpose. As you can see, my wings are still white whereas Gabriel’s are brown.”

“They aren’t _brown_ , they’re _mahogany.”_

Castiel shrugged. “Many angels are extremely sensitive about their colorings.”

“You used to be,” Gabriel pouted, annoyed that his little jab wasn’t getting the appropriate response. “Especially when you were _several centuries overdue._ ”

“It doesn’t matter what color my wings are anymore.” Castiel said shortly. “I have done things that most angels cannot even dream of doing. I wouldn’t care if my wings never change color. Maybe white _is_ my color.”

Pleased by Gabriel’s ‘overdue’ comment, Dean just wrapped his arms around Castiel and pulled him back against his chest, kissing him softly.

“I’m with you. Besides, whatever _color_ they are, I can still do this.”

He reached up and grabbed a double fistful of Castiel’s feathers, the angel giving a keening cry and falling against him, shivering. Gabriel laughed as Dean ran his hands through the liquid feathers, up over the sensitive skin between Castiel’s wings, and Castiel had to latch onto Dean’s shoulders to keep his legs from buckling.

“Geez, don’t be obscene, Dean-o,” Gabriel teased as Sam rolled his eyes.

“Get a room, you two,” Sam laughed.

Dean just picked Castiel up and started carrying him towards the house when they both blinked out of existence. Gabriel grinned. “Wonder where they went this time.”

“More time for us, I suppose,” Sam winked, leaning back against the car and finally popping the beer Dean had brought him. Gabriel pulled a bottle of holy water from thin air and jumped into the hood of the car next to Sam. Sam hid his flair of disappointment when Gabriel tucked his wings out of sight.

“What did Castiel mean earlier, when he touched your wings? ‘Good thing I have Dean then?’”

Gabriel smiled softly. “Oh, he was expecting a certain reaction from my wings and didn’t get it. Lucky bastard.”

Sam frowned, picking up on the archangel’s distress. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t have a mate, Sam. That’s why Castiel was surprised. My wings responded to him by searching to see if he was compatible as my mate and it surprised him. If he didn’t have Dean, we both would’ve been sexually aroused. He was _embarrassed._ ” Gabriel muttered bitterly, unsure as to why he was talking to Sam about this.

Something about Sam always made him confess things he didn’t want to.

“You don’t have a mate?” Sam tried again, his tone gentle, and Gabriel shook his head.

“Why do you think I’m screwing with humans?”

Sam raised an eyebrow and Gabriel flinched. “That…came out much harsher than I intended. Let me start over.”

“Ok.” Sam said shortly and waited. Gabriel met his gaze for a long moment before shaking his head and shrugging.

“I was friends with Cas in Heaven, not because I was the big older brother looking out for the weirdo kid angel who liked watching the Earth and playing with clouds, but because we were both waiting for something. He was waiting for his wings to change, I was waiting for my mate. Imagine…I wasn’t just an angel, I was one of the Firstborn: an archangel, first brother to Michael and Lucifer and Raphael, one of the Four. And I had no mate. I watched angels millennia younger than me getting paired off but not a single touch to my wings brought anything other than disgust and annoyance. Castiel was the first angel I met who didn’t immediately try to touch my wings. He was far more interested in people. So I Earth-watched with him and we were friends until I left and I forgot what it was like to want to have a mate. I found solace in humans, fleeting relationships that meant little because I didn’t have to worry about finding that one person who would make my wings flare. Now that Cas has Dean…”

“You feel like you’re alone again.” Sam finished softly.

“I am alone.” Gabriel muttered miserably. “My brothers are dead or worse. My family is in disarray. I’ll never have a mate…”

Sam turned to face Gabriel, tucking himself between the archangel’s legs and pulled him flush against his waist.

“You’re not alone, Gabriel. You still have Cas, and Dean, and Bobby…and me. You have me, even if I am only human.”

“Oh Sam,” Gabriel said softly, reaching up to tangle his fingers through Sam’s hair and tug him down for a kiss. “You’re so much more than human.”

Sam slid his arms around Gabriel’s waist, slightly surprised when the archangel let him lay him out over the hood of the car. Gabriel stubbornly kept his hands away from his waist, blocking every attempt to further their activities, and finally Sam fell still, nestled against Gabriel’s chest while the angel carded his fingers through his hair. Even then, Sam found himself wondering what it would be like to run his fingers through Gabriel’s feathers.

Because if Dean could be Castiel’s mate…then he could be Gabriel’s.


	6. A Touch of Your Hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel and Dean celebrate their one-year anniversary.

Sam wasn’t exactly sure when he’d started keeping track of how long he and Gabriel had been…doing their thing. He knew the whole ‘friends with benefits’ thing was kind of outdated and he didn’t think it really covered what he and Gabriel had. He’d come to feel he could confide in Gabriel about things he couldn’t even tell Dean and Gabriel let him see a side of himself he showed no one else, not even Castiel.

Now he was watching Gabriel after the archangel had relaxed enough to slip into an angel trance, curled up next to him. Rarely would Gabriel feel comfortable enough to rest against him and Sam had noticed that Gabriel always kept his back turned away from him. Guarding his wings, no doubt, and so Sam ran a hand through his hair despite wanting to see how Gabriel’s wings would react to him.

He had learned from experience that while Gabriel was perfectly aware of what he was physically doing now, he was alone in his head for once. So he let himself think about what he wanted from his relationship with Gabriel. It scared him how easily it came to him.

He wanted to wake up, every day for the rest of his life, just like this. Gabriel tucked against his side, naked and sore from a great night of sex, and three words resting on the tip of his tongue.

 _Hey, Gabriel, this might be crazy but…I think I love you._ _Weird, right?_

There was one way to find out if this was going to last or not, if they were meant to be. Sam slid his arms around Gabriel’s waist, threading his hands together and pulling himself flush against the archangel’s chest. Six inches higher, between Gabriel’s shoulder blades, and he would know. They would both know.

“Morning, sexy,” Gabriel murmured sleepily and Sam jumped in surprise before pressing a chaste kiss to the archangel’s lips. He was met with Gabriel’s pouty face when he pulled away and Sam laughed, leaning in again for what Gabriel deemed a _proper_ kiss. IE, a great deal more tongue and more often than not leading into other ways of prying the archangel into wakefulness.

“Morning,” Sam purred into his lips before slipping away, giving Gabriel a perfect view of his ass as he got dressed. Gabriel made appreciative comments until all that gorgeous skin was hidden beneath cloth before he snapped his fingers to dress himself.

“Think Bobby will let me skip out on the cookout this afternoon?”

Sam laughed. “Not even if Hell froze over. This is the first time he’s gotten to celebrate one of us being in a stable relationship for this long and he’s pulling out all the stops. He’s making his own patented BBQ. I haven’t seen him make it since Dean’s sixteenth birthday and Dad officially gave him the Impala. Besides, Cas is your brother. Don’t you want to celebrate with him?”

Gabriel shrugged, wrapping his arms around Sam’s waist and placing a kiss between his shoulder blades. “Cas doesn’t need me. He’ll be making goo goo eyes at Dean all day.”

“I bet he’ll love seeing you there. It’s not like there’s going to be many people. Just you, me, Dean, Bobby, and maybe Sheriff Rhodes.”

“And Bobby’s crazy neighbors.”

“Crazy neighbors?”

“You know, the _normal_ people who live next door.”

Sam laughed, turning in Gabriel’s arms and bending as Gabriel stretched up for a kiss. “If nothing else, I’ll be there to distract you. I’m going to need distracting myself because you said it yourself, Dean and Cas are going to be eye-fucking all day.”

* * *

Nothing was further from the truth. All day, Dean and Castiel were barely even in the same room together. Castiel was, more often than not, in the kitchen with Jody or outside at the grill with Bobby. He’d taken to cooking like a cat to catnip and couldn’t be more easily distracted.

Sam and Gabriel took to entertaining as a few people from the nearby town came by, having heard about the little party from Jody. They all seemed to be people who remembered the zombie fiasco that Bobby and his two boys, the Winchesters, had helped out with a few years back. So it was an easy and relaxed atmosphere for the most part, especially since everyone brought their own beer.

Dean made no appearance for most of the day so Sam grabbed a beer from the fridge and headed upstairs to where Dean was hiding. He knocked on the door to announce his entrance before sliding in.

“Dean, Bobby’s asking for you and you know, your boyfriend hasn’t seen you all day either.”

Dean didn’t even look up, staring at the tape deck in front of him like it was going to leap at him and start cursing in every language known to man.

“Dean?”

Dean jumped in surprise before sighing, taking the beer without a word.

“What’s wrong?”

“I was supposed to have this done two weeks ago and now…” he gestured to the mess of tapes on the desk and sighed again, taking a long drink from the bottle.

“What is it?” Sam asked quietly, picking up the nearest tape. _Best of Metallica-Part 2_ read the label and Dean shrugged hopelessly.

“I’m trying to make Cas a mix tape for our anniversary. I know, it’s not something grand and spectacular but…”

“He’ll love it. I know he will,” Sam said confidently.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, he will. Because you worked hard at it and put a lot of thought into it and he’ll know that. He’s like the dad that keeps his kid’s half-assed macaroni drawings because of the love put into them.”

“Tell me you did not just compare Cas to being my dad.”

Sam laughed. “I figured you deserved that. Cas was complaining about how you keep calling out to _his_ Father when you’re…”

“SAM!” Dean interjected. “Go away if you’re not going to help!”

“Fine, fine.” Sam pulled a chair around and sat down. “You know, this would be so much easier if you’d let me make a CD.”

* * *

Gabriel sighed as Sam disappeared and wandered over to where Castiel was manning the grill for Bobby. Just for kicks, he wrapped his arms around Castiel’s waist and kissed his cheek.

“Hey there, bro,”

Castiel rolled his eyes, unperturbed by Gabriel’s antics. “Sam abandon you?”

“Nah, I just came over to see how you were doing! Can’t I do that?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “You’ve been avoiding me since I groomed your wings for you though I can’t imagine why.”

“I haven’t been avoiding you. I’ve just had…stuff to take care of and…”

Castiel fixed him with a look and Gabriel gave in. “Fine, I’ve been avoiding you. I didn’t want to make you feel bad, having to deal with my psychosis on your anniversary.”

“Gabriel,” Castiel put down the tongs so he could lay a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder. “You’re my brother and I love you. There’s nothing I wouldn’t put up with from you. You will find a mate.”

Gabriel snorted as Castiel jumped straight to the root of the problem. “After this long? I don’t think I have one, bro.”

“You do. Closer than you think, perhaps.” Castiel remarked, turning back to the ribs on the grill.

Gabriel frowned. “What makes you say that?”

“While you have pointedly stayed removed from Sam’s thoughts on the matter, I have not. He wishes to make your relationship a monogamous one.”

Gabriel laughed, turning up his beer and draining it in one gulp. “You want to know something ironic?”

Castiel didn’t respond, knowing Gabriel was just going to tell him anyway.

“I haven’t been with anyone other than him since we started this thing.”

“How ironic,” Castiel murmured with just a touch of sarcasm, removing the ribs from the grill and placing them on the platter Jody had just brought out. “Neither has he.”

Gabriel stared in wonder at his brother’s back as Castiel carried the ribs back towards the house.

“Is this what you felt like when I was pushing you at Dean?” he shouted.

He nearly had a heart attack when Castiel calmly raised a hand and flipped him off.

* * *

Gabriel was very drunk. He hadn’t meant to get drunk but after Sam disappeared and the long line of faces he didn’t know and had to pretend to be human for just got longer, he ended up in the kitchen pouring holy water into his iced tea. Bobby had just made a face and clapped him on the shoulder.

“It’ll be over soon, kid.”

“Don’t call me kid, I was fathering children before your great-grandparent’s grandparents were cells in their parent’s gametes.” Gabriel muttered miserably.

He earned a smack in the back of the head with the skillet in Bobby’s hand for that one. The only thing it hurt was the skillet.

It was nearly half an hour of introductions later when he walked back outside on the deck and found Sam talking to a lovely girl with bouncy black curls. He wandered over and pressed himself against Sam’s side, almost purring when Sam wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“Hey there, pipsqueak.”

“My Samsquatch,” Gabriel murmured affectionately, wrapping his arms tightly around Sam’s waist and rubbing his cheek against those firm abs.

“You’re right, he is gorgeous.” The nameless girl remarked and Gabriel frowned, realizing they’d been talking about him.

“Oh, really now? What was Sammy here saying about me?”

She grinned mischievously but her words were stolen when Dean finally came out to join the party, wrapping his arms around Castiel’s waist and kissing him full on the mouth to joyous catcalls from the visitors.

“About time!” Jody cheered. “I was beginning to wonder if I’d come to the wrong party.”

Dean rolled his eyes, wrapping his arm around Castiel’s shoulders as they turned back to the group. Castiel looked more than a little dazed from where he was now tucked against Dean’s side.

“Finally we can eat!” Someone shouted and everyone laughed, Bobby ushering everyone to where he and Jody had laid out a table buffet-style.

Dean and Cas hung back for a moment, slipping back into the house while everyone else was eating.

“Here,” Dean said without fanfare, handing Cas the mix tape he and Sam had finished. “Sam helped.”

Castiel smiled as he turned it over in his hands, his whole face lighting up. There was only a moment’s pause before he surged up, wrapping his arms around Dean’s shoulders and kissing him fervently.

“Thank you so much, Dean.”

“You haven’t even listened to it yet!” Dean protested and Castiel shrugged.

“I don’t have to. I know I’ll love it.”

Dean laughed, this time hugging Castiel tightly when the angel leapt into his arms.

“I’m sorry, Dean, but my gift cannot so easily be handed to you. I’ll have to give it to you later.”

“That’s fine,” Dean replied breathlessly, brushing his lips over Castiel’s one more time before rejoining the party.

“And don’t get drunk,” Castiel said as they slipped to Bobby’s side. “I need you to stay up all night.”

“And where are you two idjits going to be at ‘staying up all night?’” Bobby frowned, handing them both full plates.

“It’s a surprise for Dean,” Castiel said simply and Bobby and Jody sat to either side of the couple, both framing and protecting them from the crowd of mostly drunken visitors.

Bobby entertained for barely an hour before he started pointedly shooing people away. Most were pretty willing to leave and soon even Jody was packing up. Dean had stayed away from any and all alcohol, wanting to remember every second of whatever Castiel had planned. Judging from the way Castiel was practically bouncing as the last guest left, it was going to be incredible.

“Sam and Gabe couldn’t say goodbye before they bunked down for the night?” he complained, helping Bobby with the dishes.

“Can you see Gabriel doing dishes?” Bobby said shortly.

The next second, they both looked around in frustration as all the dishes were suddenly cleaned and put away. A quick glance around the house showed that all signs of the anniversary cookout had disappeared, leaving only an eager Castiel standing in the living room. Dean noted he had changed from a suit and tie to ripped jeans, a Led Zeppelin tee, and a leather jacket. He held Dean’s own leather jacket in his hands.

“Ready?” Castiel purred and Dean shrugged, looking back at Bobby.

“You said we could go when the house was clean.”

Bobby smiled, clapping Dean on the shoulder. “Go on, you two. Have fun. I’m gonna hit the hay anyhow.”

Castiel stopped Bobby on the way to the stairs, giving him a quick hug. “Thank you for this. It was a wonderful dinner.”

“Idjit,” Bobby returned affectionately, patting Castiel’s cheek before he headed upstairs.

“Ready when you are,” Dean said softly when he was gone and Castiel grinned, touching his arm.

Bobby’s house melted away and they were suddenly standing in a well-lit garden, overlooking where a large crowd seemed to be gathering for something.

“Where are we?” Dean looked around for something familiar, his gaze landing on the illuminated Statue of Liberty none too far away. “New York?”

“Madison Square Garden, actually.” Castiel grinned, his eyes bursting with excitement.

“Madison Square Garden?” Dean repeated, looking back to Castiel. “Seems kinda plain compared to some of our usual trips. What gives?”

Castiel folded his arms behind his back, rocking on his heels, grinning fit to burst. “Madison Square Garden…1973.”

Dean froze, first looking from Castiel down to the crowd and back again. He pointed to the people below, his mouth working wordlessly as Castiel laughed out.

“Yes, Dean. This is my gift to you: a Led Zeppelin concert.”

Dean lunged to his side, picking the angel up and spinning him in his exuberance, kissing him excitedly. “Dude, marry me.”

Castiel just laughed, taking his hand and tugging him towards the crowd. “Come on. I am certain I can get us backstage.”

* * *

 Sam gasped as Gabriel pressed him down into the bed, his hips automatically rolling up to meet the archangel’s as Gabriel spread his legs wide. His bare skin grazed over Gabriel’s jeans and he whined with want. It had been a whole _week_ since they’d done anything, anything at all, and an hour was too long to wait. Any amount of time was too long; if he died with Gabriel’s cock in his ass, it would be a good death.

Apparently Gabriel agreed with him because he leaned back, shucking off his shirt and Sam wrapped his legs around the angel’s waist as Gabriel magicked his belt and jeans off. His body _knew_ Gabriel by now and all he needed was a little lube before Gabriel was pushing in, completing him. Sam shivered, his hand clenching on Gabriel’s shoulder.

“Fuck, so good, sucking me in so tight, Sam, so tight,” Gabriel murmured and Sam tugged him down for a kiss.

This simple action triggered a change in Gabriel as Sam signaled him for what he wanted tonight. Tonight he didn’t want rough or kinky, he just wanted to be surrounded and smothered in everything that was Gabriel. The archangel slid his arms under Sam’s legs, pushing his knees to his chest, and Gabriel pressed him down into the mattress, covering him with his body.

Gabriel’s body undulated against his, filling him over and over. Sam wrapped his arms around Gabriel’s shoulders, dangerously close to the forbidden wings but if Gabriel didn’t want him there, he had yet to say.

He dug his heels into the archangel’s lower back, pulling Gabriel closer, for once thankful for the size of his body because it let him surround Gabriel completely, holding him tightly against him. Sam could feel Gabriel’s breath hot against his neck and he swallowed hard. If he was going to do it, ever, he might as well do it now.

One touch…one touch was all it would take. Right here, right now, he’d find out if he and Gabriel would last. If trying a relationship would work, if there was a future for them…it all suddenly overwhelmed Sam and he tightened his grip around Gabriel. Gabriel’s rhythm stuttered and he slowed, looking down at Sam with concern.

“Sam?”

Their faces were inches apart, sharing each other’s air as Sam stared up in wonder at Gabriel.

“I don’t want this to end.” Sam whispered and Gabriel’s eyes widened. “Not ever.”

“Sam…” Gabriel breathed, his brow furrowing and he gasped when Sam’s hand trailed up his back. “Sam, no…”

“Why not?” Sam growled, tightening his legs around Gabriel’s waist.

“What if…what if you’re not…” Gabriel bit his lip and shoved his face into Sam’s neck, hiding there. “I don’t want this to end either. I don’t.”

“It won’t,” Sam said firmly, kissing Gabriel’s temple. “It won’t end because I am, Gabriel, _I am your mate._ ”

His hand surged up, grasping when he sensed Gabriel’s wings were, seeking them out as if he’d always known where they were. In a way, he always had. Electric energy coursed down his arm, far different from the energy he’d felt when touching Castiel’s wing. In that sudden burst, he didn’t see the universe in its vast expanse. He only saw, only _felt_ , Gabriel.

Gabriel’s reaction was instantaneous, his hips jerking hard, driving his cock deeper inside Sam and Sam bit his lip hard, shivering under the onslaught of sensation.

“Oh…oh fffuuuuUUUUCCK SAM!” Gabriel howled as Sam gripped his wings in both hands, clenching the fluid light of his feathers between his fingers.

Sam gasped at the sound of cracking wood, the headboard splintering beneath Gabriel’s hands. The archangel’s lips were parted as he panted heavily, thrusting into Sam almost as an afterthought as Sam tortured his wings. Sam smiled at the look of incredulity on Gabriel’s face, leaning up to press their cheeks together.

“You…it was you, always, always you; love you, love you, Sam, love you so much SAM!”

“Gabriel…” Sam whispered, laughing giddily as Gabriel surged against him, his wings thrashing in Sam’s arms.

He rolled his hands a certain way and Gabriel screamed. “THAT! Do that again!”

Sam happily obliged and in seconds, Gabriel was melting, his skin swirling with light.

“Sam…Sam, I can’t…I-I’m gonna…”

“Let go.” Sam breathed and ground his palms against the base of Gabriel’s wings, closing his eyes against the burst of grace and light that followed.

Hours later, Sam woke to find Gabriel watching him silently, brushing his fingertips over the hunter’s peaceful features.

“Mmmm…that was nice.”

“That was fucking incredible.” Gabriel laughed, brushing a kiss over Sam’s forehead, a fondness in his eyes that Sam had never let himself believe was there until now. “Mate.”

Sam laughed lightly. “Yeah, you’re stuck with me now.”

Gabriel just shrugged and they lay there in contentment for a little while longer until Sam felt his bladder demanding attention. He nudged Gabriel but the archangel’s grip just tightened.

“Gabriel,” Sam sighed. “I have to go to the bathroom.”

“Nope.”

“Gabriel…”

“Not letting you go.”

“I will drag you behind me.”

“Good luck with that.”

Sam blinked at the familiar feel of grace flowing over him, taking care of his problem with little more than an eye twitch from Gabriel.

“Seriously?” he scoffed and Gabriel smirked up at him.

“I waited 4 billion years for you, Samsquatch. I’ll be damned if I’m letting you leave my arms ever again.”

* * *

 


	7. Family Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Gabriel share their new relationship with Dean and Castiel.

Dean smoothed the cloth over his Baby’s paint. He’d finished buffing away the latest scratches from one of his and Castiel’s rougher nights on the side of the road. There was still a subtle dent from where Castiel had slammed his hand down on trunk, leaving a barely recognizable handprint. Dean had opted to leave it there, now smoothing the cloth over the indentation lovingly.

“Dean,” Castiel’s voice floated up from where the angel was tucked under the hood of the car.

“Yeah, Cas?”

“I do not believe that is supposed to be loose.”

Dean headed back to his side, laying a hand on the small of Castiel’s back as he leaned over, following Castiel’s finger to the problem.

“Nope. Good eye, I’ll grab a wrench.”

Bobby’s radio sat on a barrel a few yards away, playing Dean’s anniversary mix tape. As Dean walked over to the tool box, the tape stopped and began to rewind automatically, stopping and beginning to play again at the beginning of the song.

“Cas, quit it.” Dean sighed. “There are other songs on the tape.”

“I like this one.” Castiel said shortly from under the hood and Dean couldn’t help but smile.

One year, it had been an entire _year_. Castiel was still here. Castiel had chosen to be with him and they were mates and no one was ever going to come and take him away. Dean crossed the yard, setting the wrench down on the cool engine and pulling Castiel into his arms, holding him tightly.

“I love you.”

Castiel immediately dropped the junk carburetor he’d been curiously exploring and wrapped his arms around Dean’s shoulders, his grip slightly painful but only because he knew Dean liked it.

 _I’m so afraid I’m going to lose you._ Dean thought when his voice betrayed him.

“You will never lose me.” Castiel whispered. “Even when you pass on, I will be waiting for you in Heaven and we will be together always.”

“Promise?” Dean certainly did not whimper.

“It is not a matter of promises to be kept,” Castiel said firmly. “It is simply what is and will always be. We are bound to one another, mates eternal. There could be universes between us and we would find each other.”

Dean pulled back to see the steadfast certainty in Castiel’s eyes. For a moment, the angel’s gaze was hard and determined before he softened against his chest, leaning up to brush their lips together.

“You have nothing to fear, beloved.”

Castiel slid back to the car, taking the wrench and reaching in to fix the loose bolt. Dean lay a hand on the small of Castiel’s back. He felt Castiel’s wings slide against his skin and drew comfort from the electric pulse.

“So…forever.”

“Yes.”

“Forever forever.”

“Yes, Dean.”

“What about 30 years from now?”

Castiel turned in his arms. “What happens 30 years from now?”

“I’ll be old and hairy.”

Castiel quirked an eyebrow, his eyes thoughtful as if he were imagining what Dean would look like ‘old and hairy.’

“Your point?”

“Will you still be with me?”

“Of course.”

“But you’ll be young.”

“Only in appearance.”

“And I’ll have gray hair.”

“I like gray.”

“And when my dick doesn’t work?”

“There’s more to life than sex.”

“And what about when I die?”

“Race you to Heaven.”

Castiel laughed at the look Dean gave him and leaned up to peck his lips. “You’re stuck with me, Dean Winchester, so get over it.”

Dean watched him fondly as Castiel leaned back over to double check the engine and Dean leaned forward, wrapping his arms around the angel’s waist once again and leaning down to press his forehead between Castiel’s shoulder blades. A moment more and he’d be letting Castiel carry his weight.

“When we get to Heaven, can we have sex on Raphael’s bed?”

Castiel had to lean on the Impala’s engine for support, his laughter echoing through the junkyard.

At last, Castiel finished tightening the bolt and straightened, closing the hood and sliding up onto it. He patted the metal before him and Dean climbed up after him, curling up against his chest as Castiel leaned back against the windshield. He didn’t relax until he felt both Castiel’s arms and wings wrapping firmly around him, cocooning him in feathers.

“You really think Sam is Gabriel’s mate?” he murmured, eyes closed.

“I have seen sparks between them.”

“I bet you mean, like, actually sparks, don’t you?” Dean laughed, too content to move, and he felt Castiel’s chuckle reverberate through him.

“Yes. Gabriel’s wings have a way of stretching towards Sam even when he tries to hold them back and Sam’s soul reacts by reaching out for his grace. Energy jumps between them when they get close enough and I don’t think Gabriel will be able to deny it much longer.”

“Mmm,” Dean rolled onto his back so he could look up at Castiel, sliding a hand behind the angel’s head. “My little bro’s getting married.”

Castiel laughed. “Something like that.”

“What do you think about us?”

“Hm?”

“Getting married?”

Castiel quirked an eyebrow. “I haven’t given it much thought.”

Dean lifted his head slightly, his brow furrowed, and Castiel shrugged lightly. “Marriage is a human ceremony; our bond transcends its bounds. In essence, we are already married.”

Dean watched as Castiel tilted his head then smiled. “What?”

“Jimmy…he is awake.”

Dean grinned, leaning up to whisper in Castiel’s ear. “Hi Jimmy.”

Castiel squirmed beneath him, trying to rub his ear on his shoulder. “Dean, that tickles.”

Dean laughed, brushing a kiss over Castiel’s jaw, taking comfort in the slight burn from the stubble there. He still needed to teach Castiel how to shave. Though he might not ever, he liked the feel of those rough cheeks on his thighs.

“What did he say?”

Castiel chuckled softly as Dean pressed his face into his neck, brushing soft kisses over the skin there.

“Dean…”

“What’d he say?” Dean prompted again even as he brushed a hand over the knoll of Castiel’s wings.

“DEAN!” Castiel gasped, bucking beneath him. “H-He said, ‘He’s asking you to marry him, so say yes you twit!’”

Dean laughed, hiding his face in Castiel’s shoulder and Castiel relaxed beneath him, smoothing his hair soothingly. “Really?”

Castiel smiled up at him, his hand coming to rest on Dean’s cheek. “I recognize the significance of such an event. If you want to get married, Dean, all you have to do is say so.”

Dean blinked, taken aback at Castiel’s bluntness before he leaned down to press their lips together. It never failed to surprise him when that spark passed between them, the jump of Castiel’s grace at the proximity of his soul. One kiss turned into many and soon Castiel was rolling them over, slotting himself between Dean’s thighs…

“Hey bitches.”

Castiel growled, looking up at where his brother had just landed with Sam on the roof of the Impala.

“Gabriel.” Dean snapped, annoyed, and then Sam was sticking his bare foot in his brother’s face.

“Dammit, Sam!” Dean flailed, reaching back to try and smack his brother but Sam darted out of the way, grinning giddily. Dean jumped down and began chasing his brother around the yard.

Castiel smiled softly as he stretched then climbed up to sit next to his brother. “You seem to be in a better mood today, brother.”

Gabriel grinned, leaning back on his hands as Sam easily outstripped his shorter brother. “Yeah, well, you know how great sex can be as a mood lifter. And last time was pretty fantastic.”

Castiel’s expression didn’t change, still fondly watching the brothers. “Oh?”

“Yeah, I can’t believe I didn’t realize it before but Sam’s a really fast learner. I understand now why you go crazy for Dean so easy, the things Sammy was doing to my wings…” Gabriel whistled appreciatively, smirking as he noticed Castiel had frozen next to him.

“Sam…your…you…YES!”

Gabriel squeaked as he suddenly had an armful of white feathers, Castiel having tackled him so hard they rolled off the back of the Impala and Gabriel quickly turned so he landed on the ground, sparing Castiel the fall. Castiel was laughing against him.

“I told you so!”

“Oh, shut up.” Gabriel groaned, shoving his brother off of him. “I hate you.”

Castiel was beaming even as he rolled to his feet and Dean had stopped chasing Sam, doubled over with his hands on his knees. Sam blinked at the two angels before Castiel was wrapping his arms around the younger Winchester’s waist.

“I’m so happy for you.”

Dean blinked, looking from Sam to Gabriel to Castiel and then up to the sky in exasperation.

“Crap, you mean I’m related to Sparkles now?”

“Yep.” Sam laughed gleefully.

“Technically you have been since you started banging Cas.” Gabriel complained from the dirt until Sam walked over and lifted him up easily.

Dean rolled his eyes as Castiel wrapped himself around Dean’s waist and he laid his hands over Castiel’s and leaning back against the angel. Castiel bore his weight easily.

“We were actually just talking about you, Gabriel, and what are you doing to my brother?”

Gabriel had dipped Sam and was kissing him rather noisily and Dean groaned, turning to hide his face in Castiel’s feathers.

“Tell me we weren’t this bad.”

Castiel chuckled against him, sliding around in front of him as one hand dipped down to the curve of his ass. Dean’s head jerked up in surprise. Even after all this time, Castiel was rarely handsy.

“Oh no, Dean, we were worse. Remember the time Bobby caught us on the kitchen table?”

“Oh, guys, _really?_ I _ate_ there!” Sam protested from Gabriel’s arms. Castiel just shrugged.

“There was no residual after effects that I could not remove.”

Sam mimed gagging while Gabriel just laughed.

“Hey, Samsquatch, ever seen the Earth from space?”

Sam grinned. “Nope.”

“Want to?”

“Hells yeah.”

“Wait, what?” Dean gasped, starting forward to protest when Gabriel stretched out his wings and with one great down swoop, they were gone.

Dean spun around, looking to Castiel as Castiel followed their rise into the sky.

“Cas!”

“You seem concerned, Dean.”

“Hell if I’m not!” Dean yelped. “That’s my brother up there! What if he falls?”

“Gabriel will not let him fall.”

“But…”

“Do you think I would allow you to fall?”

“No, never.” Dean said firmly and Castiel smiled.

“Then believe that Gabriel will treat Sam with the same care that I give you. Sam is Gabriel’s mate now. Gabriel will never allow any harm to come to him.”

Dean slid an arm over Castiel’s shoulders and looked up, scanning the clouds for any sign of the archangel and his brother. After a moment, he heard Castiel sigh wistfully beside him. He glanced down, recognizing the longing look in his boyfriend’s…husband’s… _mate’s_ eyes.

“Cas, you okay?”

“Hm?” Castiel jumped, seemingly startled before shrugging and leaning against his side. “I suppose I miss flying.”

“But you zap like…everywhere.”

Castiel snorted. “That is not flying; that is zapping. Yes, wings help in steering me when I’m ‘zapping’ but it’s not _flying._ It’s like the difference between sprinting taking a leisurely jog.”

“So why don’t you hop on up and go for a spin?” Dean suggested softly.

“I cannot leave you here alone.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Dude, I’ll be fine.”

Castiel turned and Dean blinked at the serious look his mate fixed him with. “You don’t understand, Dean, because we have not been apart in several months.”

Dean frowned, his brow furrowing as he realized what Castiel said was true. They’d hardly been more than six feet from each other in over six months and that was only because Dean shoved Castiel out of the bathroom, claiming there were ‘some things a man just has to do by himself,’ and then the party when so many people had been around, but not because he actually wanted to be apart from Castiel.

Hell, the very thought of being away from Castiel…ever…sent a panicked chill through him.

“It’s the bond between us,” Castiel explained, answering his unspoken question. “Your soul and my grace have been growing closer over this time and now it would be physically painful for us to separate.”

“That’s ridiculous, Cas. Look, watch.”

He slipped his arm from Castiel’s waist and pressed a hand to the angel’s chest. “Stay here.”

Castiel bit his lip but nodded, obviously fretting but he did nothing more than shift on the spot. Dean turned from him and started walking away, perfectly calmly. No big deal, he could walk across the yard, up onto the porch, into the kitchen and grab a beer.

On second thought, maybe just to the porch. Yeah, that was far enough.

Psh, he didn’t even have to go that far. Just twelve feet.

Maybe just six feet.

At five and a half feet, Dean couldn’t breathe. His heart was pounding and he felt like someone had strapped a rubber band to his soul and the other end was attached to a jet fighter doing mach 3. He turned around and Castiel was all but tearing his own fingernails off in frustration at the sheer effort of remaining still. Dean opened his mouth to say something but all that came out was a soft whimper and then Castiel was running into his open arms, pressing his face to Dean’s chest.

“Don’t ever…ever try that again, you stupid…stupid…”

Apparently Castiel couldn’t come up with a word to describe him so he just huffed and let Dean worriedly run his hands through the angel’s dark locks.

“That’s what I mean when I say I _can’t,_ Dean.”

Dean was shaking and he pulled Castiel back with him to sit on the porch steps.

“So…” Dean said softly when his heart rate had returned to normal and Castiel wasn’t shivering in his arms. He looked up apprehensively at the clouds. Gabriel and Sam still hadn’t made an appearance.

“So…take me with you.” He said quickly before he thought twice about it. Castiel raised his head, looking up at him inquisitively.

“You hate flying.”

“I’ve never flown with you. Besides, it’s not the flying. It’s the falling and inevitable high-sped impact with the ground that scares me. And weren’t you the one who just asked me if I thought you would let me fall?”

Castiel blinked thoughtfully before getting to his feet, pulling Dean up behind him. Dean hesitated as Castiel’s wings flickered into physical existence, curling around him protectively.

“Do we have to take off like Gabby and Sam did?”

Castiel shook his head. “I can opt for a smoother ascension.”

“Cool.” Dean whispered, his voice suddenly tight.

“Perhaps you would feel more secure on my back.”

Dean nodded, not trusting his voice. His heart was hammering against his chest and he was sure it was just going to burst and he was going to die right here on the ground. Castiel chuckled lightly.

“You’re going to be fine, Dean.”

The smooth roughness of Castiel’s voice calmed him somewhat and he slid around behind Castiel, wrapping his arms around Castiel’s shoulders. He felt Castiel shift beneath him, felt Castiel’s hands on his hips, and the next second Castiel had hoisted him onto his back as if he were a five pound sack of nothing.

“Geez,” he blushed. “I haven’t had a piggyback ride since I was five.”

“This will be easier.” Castiel explained and Dean shrugged, shrinking down against Castiel’s shoulders and hiding his face in his neck.

“Hi Ho, Silver,” he murmured.

He felt Castiel begin to run but his eyes were tightly shut. Castiel held him so firmly he didn’t even bounce, not even when he felt Castiel’s wings spreading out to either side. A few minutes passed, marked only by the downbeat of Castiel’s wings.

“Open your eyes, Dean.”

Dean opened his eyes and for a second, his stomach struggled to turn itself inside out at the sight of the ground so very very far below. He was far more exposed than he had been in the airplane and just as high. The only thing between him and the ground was Castiel and…it was _Castiel._

Brilliant white wings extended to either side, fluttering ever slightly in the wind, Castiel’s dark hair whipped back, his hands resting lightly over Dean’s thighs. Secure. Safe.

_I’ve got you, Dean._

He leaned down, managing to talk himself into letting go of Castiel’s shoulders so he could zip up his jacket against the wind and Castiel’s hands tightened around his thighs, holding him steady until he felt Dean lower himself again, wrapping his arms back around his shoulders. Then Dean kissed his cheek, stubble rough against his skin.

“I love you, Cas.” He whispered and Castiel turned his head, brushing their lips together.

“Hey,” Dean murmured when they parted. “Maybe one day we can invent a new way to join the Mile High Club.”

“What is this club and why would you want to join it? You aren’t the type for clubs.”

Dean laughed. “Mile High Club is this unofficial group of people who’ve had sex at a mile above the ground or higher.”

“We are much higher than that now.”

Maybe one day…when lines like that didn’t make him curl up against Castiel’s back and cling like a child.

* * *

His steps made no sound on the hard wood floor of Bobby’s library. He bypassed the creak by the desk with the ease of practice. Brushing his fingertips over the line of books, his gaze rose to the sealed box at the top of the bookshelf. Enochian sigils and something else bound the chest and he crooked his fingers.

“Come here, love,”

The chest wobbled before toppling into his waiting arms and he smiled, caressing the wood lovingly.

“You see, I have this thing about prophecies. You should always give the ones involved a heads-up. Rude, Michael…very rude.”

He stretched his wings and was gone.

* * *

“Hey bro!”

A shadow passed over them and then Gabriel was hovering just over them, staggered so he could talk to Castiel without shouting and without interfering with their flight pattern. Sam stretched down, half hanging off of Gabriel’s shoulders and tweaked Dean’s ear.

“Get off!” Dean snapped, flailing back at his brother and Castiel had to adjust to keep Dean on his back.

“Dean, don’t move so suddenly.” Cas pleaded and just like that, Dean was firmly attached to his neck again. He felt Castiel chuckle.

“I’m not going to drop you, you just threw off my balance,” Castiel explained but Dean still doesn’t think he’s going to let go anytime soon.

“Hey bro!” Gabriel tries again. “We’re over Illinois, feel like a fly-by?”

“Oh no…” Castiel breathed. “I completely forgot…Dean, hold on, I’m sorry.”

Dean felt his stomach flip-flop as suddenly they were dropping. Castiel’s wings closed in around him and Dean actually felt safer surrounded by them than he did when they were holding them aloft. Now they were speeding towards the ground, probably breaking the sound barrier, and he was just glad to be surrounded by Castiel’s feathers.

No one noticed when two white feathers sheared off and were left behind to float until they turned to dust.

The next second Dean was on his feet, Castiel’s hand splayed across his chest to steady him, and they were standing outside an unfamiliar house with a familiar blond teen on the front porch.

“Castiel!” she shouted eagerly and ran forward.

Castiel stepped away from Dean and enveloped the girl in a warm hug. “Claire.”

Dean let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding when Gabriel and Sam landed behind them and Castiel smoothed Claire’s hair back, kissing her forehead.

“I am sorry, I almost missed it.”

She shook her head, her eyes bright with tears. “After all you’ve seen, I wouldn’t have gotten worked up if you missed my birthday.”

Dean’s eyes widened slightly. _Oh._

“Jimmy can stay for a few days. I believe you have a party planned for tomorrow?”

Dean suddenly felt his world drop out of orbit. Castiel would be staying here, with Jimmy and Amelia and Claire and not with him and suddenly he felt faint but Dean Winchester did not faint.

“Breathe.”

Castiel’s voice was firm in his ear and Dean realized he was clutching at the angel.

“ _Jimmy_ will be staying, I will not. I will be with you, as I promised.” Castiel said firmly in his ear.

“Is that what we’re going to be like?” He heard Sam from behind him.

“Nah, it’s only because Dean-o’s fighting the bond so hard that they’re taking _forever_ for it to complete.”

Dean stiffened as he felt Castiel flinch, a sadness in Castiel’s eyes that he couldn’t hide before Dean saw it as he pulled away.

“Cas…am I fighting the bond? I didn’t…”

“It’s entirely subconscious, as the bond is meant to be.” Castiel whispered. “But you’re constantly pulling away from me.”

“Cas…I don’t mean to, I don’t even know I’m doing it. I _want_ to be with you.”

“I know, Dean, that’s why I haven’t mentioned it. But it _is_ interfering with our bond.”

Dean stared at him, trying to decipher the meaning passing through Castiel’s eyes then Castiel shook his head.

“Like I said, I will leave Jimmy’s body but I will remain as close to you as I can without causing you physical harm.”

“How close is that?”

“A few miles.”

“A few miles!?” Dean half-shouted and Castiel flinched. Behind him, Claire bit her lip in worry. He could see Amelia on the porch now, her eyes worried and more than a little jealous at the sight of her husband in Dean’s arms.

“Dude, I can’t even go six feet from you without freaking out, you can’t go a mile away, not even close.”

“Dean…it’s Claire’s birthday and I promised…”

“It’s okay…” Claire started and then Dean snapped his fingers, a realization exploding across his face.

“Get inside me.”

There was total silence as everyone stared at him, including Castiel. Dean rolled his eyes, shifting in Castiel’s arms before gesturing wildly.

“I’m a vessel! I’m _Michael’s_ vessel. If I’m built to take on not just an archangel but _the archangel, Michael_ , then I think I can handle Soldier Angel #3. No offense, Cas.”

Behind them, Gabriel suddenly looked very worried but he couldn’t get his voice to work.

“None taken,” Castiel breathed. “You’re not my vessel, not my true vessel. I could hurt you.”

“I seriously doubt that.” Dean laughed. “In fact, I think our bond will go nuts over it.”

“It could solve the problem we’re having…” Castiel trailed off, biting his lip, and Dean just grinned.

“So, like I said, get inside me. Not like you’ve never been inside me before.”

Claire actually laughed behind Castiel, in sync with Gabriel as Castiel blushed a furious shade of pink before laying a hand on Dean’s head. There was a bright flash of light and heat flooded into him from his head to his toes, a strangely erotic tingling filling him and turning every sensation into a pinprick of light. He looked down and flexed his fingers and toes, surprised when they moved as usual.

“I’m still in control.”

 _“Of course you are,”_ Dean heard Castiel in his head. _“I would not take control from you without permission.”_

“Thought I was giving it,” Dean laughed and looked down at Jimmy.

Who was wearing his AC/DC shirt and torn jeans.

“Oh, um, well…” Jimmy laughed. “I’ll make sure these get back to you.”

“Right…” Dean was still staring at his hands. They were sharper, brighter, and he could actually see each individual line on his palms.

The tingling started spreading through him and he felt the grinding arthritis in his trigger finger fade away, the pinch of his knee from where he broke his leg was gone in an instant, the catch in his side from scar tissue…

“Cas?”

 _“Just fixing a few things.”_ Castiel hummed, going about his work.

He looked up again and his vision, which had been going with his age the past few years, was flawless. Jimmy was smiling at him knowingly and Amelia had come down off the porch to slip in next to her husband.

By the time Cas was done, the only mark left on his body was the handprint on his shoulder and Castiel settled into the back of his mind, thrumming with satisfaction.

“Dean, are you okay?” Sam asked, concerned, and Dean beamed up at him.

“Dude, I am fan- _tastic._ I feel sixteen again.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Damn, you were annoying when you were sixteen.”

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.”

Castiel chuckled in his head and Dean couldn’t help but let the laugh roll out. Even Amelia was smiling.

“Why don’t the four of you stay for dinner?”

“Thank you but no.” Dean felt his own mouth saying but they weren’t his words.

_“I apologize, Dean, but I need to speak with Jimmy.”_

_“It’s fine.”_ Dean gruffed, slightly nauseated at the feeling of his body moving without his say so.

“Cas?”  Jimmy inquired, noting the change in Dean’s posture.

“Jimmy,” Castiel said softly through his lips. He didn’t know he could speak so softly. “I’ve never gotten the opportunity to thank you for all that you have done. You have given more than I ever expected.”

Jimmy smiled, giving Amelia’s shoulders a squeeze. “You’re nothing like I expected you to be, either. You’re even more awesome.”

Dean felt Castiel smile and wondered if it looked as cute on his own face as it did on Jimmy’s. Then Castiel was turning to Amelia.

“I am sorry for everything I took from you.”

She shook her head. “You gave far more in return.”

And then Castiel was kneeling to hug Claire tightly. “If I had a daughter, I would like her to be like you.”

Claire laughed, squeezing him tightly. “Hey, you don’t get to live inside my Dad for this long without getting some claim to fatherhood.”

Castiel ran a hand lightly through her hair and kissed her forehead. Jimmy laughed, laying a hand on his shoulder.

“Cas, it’s just dinner. I’ll see you…day after tomorrow good?”

Castiel smiled but Dean felt a wave of sadness flowing through him. “Yes, I will return then.”

Castiel turned to Gabriel and the next second Dean felt this wave of energy push through him and then they were back at Bobby’s, Sam and Gabriel staring at him curiously as Castiel retreated to the back of his mind. Dean frowned at his own internal angel and Sam chuckled.

“We’re going to leave you two alone.” Gabriel smirked. “I have the feeling you have some things to work out.”

They were gone the next instant and Dean was left alone with his bondmate…and whatever issue seemed to be standing between them.

“Cas?”

_“Can we talk about it later?”_

Dean sighed. “Yeah, sure. If I want to get drunk, how should I go about this? Holy water or whiskey?”

Instead of berating him, Castiel just sighed wearily, miserably. _“Do both.”_

* * *

He descended into Hell, his own home for so long, and the man…demon?…angel?…passed through the levels with ease.

His step was as silent around the Cage as it had been in Bobby’s house, the chest resting comfortably in his arms. Lucifer greeted him almost warmly, considering, but Michael just glared at him. That was fine.

He set the chest at the edge of the Cage and with a flick of his wrist, the sigils burned away and it opened. The book was heavy in his hands and he opened it idly. The text was barely recognizable as Enochian and gave him a headache just looking at it. When he looked up, Michael was smirking.

“You didn’t think _you_ could read it, did you?”

“Why you think I’m here?” he replied amiably, holding the book up. “You know what this is; obviously, you were there when it was written: the Enochian Book of Prophecy.”

Both Lucifer and Michael were silent.

“I’ve heard tales of it but never actually seen it. Smaller than I thought it would be, but then again, there’s not much actually in here, is there? A few lines, carefully guarded to keep the masses from knowing the truth, written in the forbidden ancient language of God himself. Only archangels can read it, his chosen few. So…translate it for me.”

Michael laughed. “Why would I do such a thing?”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out four rings.  “Because I can get you out.”

Michael’s laughter died and he smiled fiendishly.

“Here’s my offer. Don’t worry, no kissing to seal it. I think you’re the one person in existence my lips aren’t going anywhere near. But here it is. You read this, give me the translation, and I’ll drop the Key right down in there for you.”

Michael’s eyes narrowed and he scoffed, rolling his shoulders in what might’ve been a shrug.

“Look, we’ll shake on it, I’ll draw up a contract, whatever you want to do. I don’t go back on my deals. I have a little something called integrity, maybe you angel pricks have heard of it.”

Michael drew as close to the gate of the Cage as he could. “Hold the Book up where I can see it and listen carefully.”

He pulled the book up to his chest, holding it open, and Michael crouched slightly to get a good look at the pages.

“’When the first angel falls, He Who Is will be broken. When the first born falls, His Kingdom will fall into chaos.”

“I thought prophecies were supposed to rhyme.”

“They do rhyme,” Michael snapped. “In Enochian; I’m translating the best I can here.”

They glared at each other for a moment before Michael bent his head and continued.

“When the God of Man walks the earth unknown, the Great Seraphim will rise in fire and passion. In blood and doubt with the Seraphim be shattered. In unconditional devotion will the Seraphim be reforged. Only when the Last Nephilim and the Great Seraphim stand together will the two sides be balanced and there will be peace. Satisfied?”

“Oh, it was good for me, was it good for you?”

Michael glared as he walked the length of the gate, closing the book. “The first angel…I’m assuming that’s you, Luci. And the first born, that’s you, Mikey. God of Man…we all know who that is. The Last Nephilim…”

“There are no more Nephilim. I destroyed them all.”

“You thought you destroyed them all. There is one left and I know where to find him.”

Michael slammed his hand against the gate. “We had a deal. Let me out.”

“That I did, that I did…stand back.”

Michael stepped back and the world subverted itself so that gate was stretched out across the ground, a wide circle with electric energy coursing over its surface. He stepped forward, holding out the four rings and he let them drop into the center of the gate. Immediately, the energy surged forward, wrapping itself around the Key and tearing at it.

“What’s happening?” Michael cried, his voice wavering slightly.

“What you agreed to.”

“I didn’t agree to this!”

“Yes, you did.” He said softly, victoriously. “I said I would drop the Key in there with you. What you didn’t know is that if I drop the Key in without the incantation, the gate will destroy it, trapping you in there forever.”

Michael roared in anger, reaching for the Key, trying to salvage it, but it was too far gone.

“How dare you! How _dare_ you!”

“How dare you slaughter _thousands_ of innocents? People, your _brothers_ , who had done you no harm? You killed every single one, every single Nephilim, and threw up a wall between humanity and angels because you were scared they’d interfere with your hostile takeover of Heaven.”

Michael cursed at him in Enochian but he just grinned as the spells fell useless on the gate.

“The truth of the matter is you failed, Michael, and the Prophecies are coming to pass just as they planned. You missed one, just one, Nephilim. But one’s enough, right?”

He stretched his stunted wings and Michael’s eyes widened in recognition. “I think it’s time I came out of hiding.”

* * *

 


	8. Don't Take What's Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean shares his body with Castiel while Jimmy spends some time with his family.

Dean stumbled out of the bar, waving lightly back at the two guys he’d hustled out of two hundred dollars, a good third of which had gone to pay for his tab. Castiel didn’t make getting drunk easier, despite not saying anything about the amount of alcohol Dean was pouring down his throat. Even being sober for much of the past year hadn’t helped. He still needed too much alcohol to even get a buzz going.

It was one a.m. and Dean had opted for a cheap motel room to get out of Bobby’s hair. Having Castiel along for the ride didn’t make avoiding the necessary conversation any easier, especially when Castiel insisted he was too drunk to drive and zapped them back to their motel room. Dean didn’t have to look to know the Impala was in the motel parking lot but it still frustrated him not having control over his own movements.

“Hey, no zapping without asking me first!” He huffed, placing one hand on the dresser to steady himself. The floor swam beneath him.

It felt weird having someone else roll your eyes.

Dean shrugged out of his jacket, letting it fall to the floor. He was drunk but Castiel still buzzed in the back of his mind. Holy water would probably have worked just as well as whiskey though Castiel said it had absolutely no flavor, just burn. Dean wanted the smooth taste of the familiar before this conversation.  He’d still packed their duffel with it before leaving though. He could sense Castiel was tipsy from their time at the bar but once he broke out the holy water, they’d both be falling all over themselves.

He wouldn’t admit he missed having Castiel next to him, the near constant presence that had been at his side for so long. He missed his blue eyes and the hard planes of his chest and the way he mewled when Dean mouthed the knoll of his wings…

_“I recognize that this is not ideal…”_

“Dammit, Cas, get out of my thoughts.”

_“Dean, I am_ living _inside your thoughts right now. I cannot remove myself from them without leaving your body.”_

“Dammit.”

He shoved himself down on the bed, not caring that the hard mattress hit his body in all the wrong ways and growled at Castiel when the angel immediately went to work chasing the pain away.

“Stop that.”

_“Stop hurting yourself.”_

“I’ll hurt myself if I damn well want to.”

_“Dean…”_

This was not going as planned. He was too drunk and Castiel was too sober. Only one way to fix that. Dean rolled off the bed and pulled his duffel up onto it, pulling out a bottle of the holy water Gabriel had made most recently. It was pink and smelled like strawberries so he hoped it tasted like them too.

It was far too sweet and burned like nothing he’d ever had before, but he kept drinking until he felt the need to breathe. He was surprised, when he pulled back, that at least half the bottle was gone. Apparently he didn’t need to breathe as much when Castiel was inside him.

Inside him. That was hilarious.

He was not giggling. He was not a happy drunk.

Cas was, though.

_“Dean…Dean let me take over…”_

“Hang on, this is trippy…”

He could feel the grace of the holy water pumping through him, thrumming in time with Castiel and it made everything around him stand out in stark clarity. He could hear his own heart, pounding in his ears, and when he looked down at his hands, he could see the blue glow that was Castiel around them. Then he was falling back on the bed and staring up at the ceiling except he could see past the ceiling, through the insulation in the roof to the stars and sky above.

“Wow…”

Castiel sighed and Dean felt himself shoved to one side in his own head, Castiel sitting up and setting the bottle down as he rubbed his forehead.

_“Hey!”_

“Dean, you are d-drunk and obvioussly in…” Castiel hiccupped. “…incapable of sterring yer own body let alone…Dammit, Dean…”

_“Name’s Dean Winchester not Dammit Dean.”_

“Be quiet.”

_“Your name is Castiel Winchester. How does that sound? I like it, screw you.”_

Castiel silently ran a hand over his face, over Dean’s face. He wasn’t sure how he felt about being inside Dean’s body. It didn’t feel wrong, it just felt…incredibly intimate.

_“I don’t mean to pull away from you, you know.”_

“Yes, you do.” Castiel said bitterly. “Otherwise, you wouldn’t be doing it.”

_“Cas…”_

“It’s subconscious, Dean. What you subconsciously want is to be away from me. You don’t want this bond, you don’t want any of it. I forced you into it, into all of this, and I’m sorry.”

_“Cas, don’t you dare blame yourself for whatever my problem is.”_

“I’m sorry, Dean, I should’ve been stronger. Maybe there’s a way to undo this…”

_“Cas, sh_ UT UP!”

Dean surged back into control, rising to his feet and pacing. “You are not undoing this. You are not even thinking about it. I don’t _know_ what the issue is, I don’t know why I’m holding back. I didn’t even know I was but don’t you…don’t you even…”

He didn’t know how it happened but suddenly he was on his knees on the motel floor, the holy water still pulsing through him. He fell forward onto his hands as broken sobs ripped through him. It was the alcohol, it had to be.

_“Dean…”_

“Don’t you even think about leaving me, asshole.” Dean gasped out. “Everyone leaves me but not you. You’re always there, every time I call, every time I need you. You never had any reason to, no need, but you gave up everything for me and you have no idea how much that means to me. You’ve seen the worst of me and still you think I should be saved. Not agreeing with you but of anyone in this world, you’re the one…”

He couldn’t talk anymore, his throat was too raw from alcohol and tears.

_“Dean…”_

Dean reached for Castiel, reached with all his might inside him to the pleasant thrumming that was his angel. He wished Castiel still had his vessel so that he could pull him into his arms but this had to work too. He could feel Castiel stretched out alongside him in his mind but fretted, it wasn’t enough. That was what all this was about, right? He and Castiel needed to bond somehow and he was holding back. He remembered…

_‘It was your soul, reaching out to me. That was the first time you gave in, letting your soul touch my grace.’_

If just touching Castiel’s grace with his soul completed the mark…Dean had an idea. He closed his eyes, looking inside himself. He could feel Castiel’s grace pulsing inside him and he looked deeper and deeper until his head was pounding, surrounded by the white light that was Castiel.

_“Dean, what are you doing?”_

Dean didn’t answer but mentally wound his hands into Castiel’s grace. He could feel it burning against him but it didn’t hurt. It just felt like sticking his hands in a warm bath.

_“Dean?”_

“I want…” he gasped out through gritted teeth. “I want you inside me, Cas.”

_“I am inside you, Dean.”_

“Not far enough.”

And with that, he pulled, leaning back and pulling Castiel’s grace inside himself, inside his soul, forcing them together despite whatever misgivings that had been holding them back.

_“Dean, stop!”_

“No, Cas, I’m gonna fix this.”

_“No!_ ”

He kept pulling, pulling Castiel inside his soul. He could feel the angel’s grace burning against his soul, it felt right, good. Castiel’s grace immediately went to the place in his soul that had been torn when Castiel brought him back from Hell. It filled in the tears as easily as if whatever souls were made of, they were the same. This was right; this was how it was supposed to be.

Castiel was sobbing, why was Castiel sobbing? This was right, wasn’t it? Bitter agony, like a wine aged too long, broke over his tongue and he felt tears pouring down his face, the sensation coming to him as if his own face was miles and miles away.

_“Dean, Dean, please stop, you don’t know what you’re doing!”_

Dean frowned, his eyes wide. It was right, this was right. “It was your soul, reaching out to me. That was the first time you gave in, letting your soul touch my grace.” He repeated and Castiel had to know that but…

_“I’m begging you!”_

He stopped pulling for no other reason than that Castiel had asked him to do so. Dean knew this was right, he knew it, but Castiel had said to stop so he stopped. Castiel was panting, stretched out against his consciousness and Dean felt like the angel was clinging to the sides of his physical body to keep himself from being pulled into Dean’s soul.

“Cas…”

_“It’s not supposed to be like this…”_ Castiel whimpered.

That was when the pain truly hit him, rocking through him, body and soul, and Dean crashed to the floor, writhing. He’d been tortured, in Hell no less, and they had nothing on this. Amid all of it was Castiel, biting back screams.

_“I-I’m sorry D-Dean…”_

And then he was pushing forward, pushing his grace into Dean’s soul and Dean grabbed him, pulling him in. His body was thrashing, his throat hoarse from screaming, and he felt hands on his shoulders, an unfamiliar grace pushing through him and then there was only darkness.

Suddenly, there wasn’t darkness. There was nothing. Nothing but himself and Castiel, the angel’s grace pulsing against his soul, curled around him and through him, shuddering in the aftershocks of whatever Dean had just done.

_Cas?_ He tried to whisper but no sound came out of his mouth. He didn’t have a mouth to speak.

Light pulsed around him and through him and in that moment he realized why he’d been holding back. Suddenly he saw himself, as he was, memories flashing before his eyes and not all of them his own.

The truth of himself and Castiel, laid bare before the other, all the good and bad open before them.

_The city was burning before him and around him, the flames growing wildly. Uriel passed over him and landed a few streets over, a comet of pure intent. He felt the angel’s laughter rather than heard it and he frowned. One should not laugh at the deaths of these beautiful creatures, not even when they had sinned such as these._

_“Liven up, Castiel. Break in those too big wings of yours.”_

_He smiled weakly for it was the only way to get Uriel to leave him alone. “Why would I deprive you of your pleasure, brother?”_

_Uriel laughed and let him carry on and Castiel’s gaze fell upon the still face of a child. Not everyone who died in the cities that day were sinners._

-

_“You’re so stupid, Dean! What were you thinking?”_

_He fought back the tears, fought back the anger and the betrayal as he poured milk into Sam’s bowl._

_“Dad…”_

_“You just fuck everything up, don’t you? Why do I even bother sometimes?”_

_The door slammed and Dean stared in horror as a tear fell from his cheek onto the back of Sam’s hand._

_“Where’s Daddy going?”_

_Dean smoothed his hair back and Sam wrapped his arms around his elder brother’s waist._

_“He’ll be back, don’t worry. Now eat your cereal.”_

_-  
_

Dean gasped, tears rolling down his nonexistent cheeks. Why had he never been good enough for John? He’d fought so hard, done everything he was asked, and none of it had ever been good enough. The man’s last words to him had been to tell him that one day, he’d have to kill his own brother.

He could feel Castiel sobbing next to him. _I’ve killed so many people, so many innocent people._

This was why he always held back. He fucked up everything he touched, he wasn’t strong enough, not good enough, not _enough_ to be anything to Castiel. He wasn’t worth it. And even as he thought it, Castiel curled around him, tighter, and he felt a broken sob choke its way from his throat.

Castiel had seen him at his worst, seen him in Hell, seen him break and be broken and somehow still loved him. No matter what he did or how he fucked up, Castiel loved him and that level of unconditional wasn’t something he deserved but it was given anyway.

He felt the angel look up at him through eyes that were not there. _I am broken, Dean._

He saw the pain Castiel felt, all the guilt and anguish from years of being used, of being a soldier, a hammer of God’s will. Even as he recognized this, he knew Castiel saw the years of pain and abuse at John’s hands, how he felt he was worthless, would never matter. Here they were, laid bare before the other, eternally bound not out of necessity anymore but this time, bound out of choice. Because, how could he love another when his soul had known the touch of its mate?

_Yeah…me too._ Dean thought. _Let’s be broken together._

Castiel laughed weakly and Dean reached out to him with his soul, grace and soul intertwining, and the years weren’t so difficult to bear when he had Castiel to lean on. Castiel filled the broken pieces inside him even as he filled Castiel and they were one.

* * *

**_Day One_ **

-

Gabriel carried Dean upstairs, the hunter thrashing in his arms. He could hear Castiel’s screams and Sam followed him wordlessly.

“Gabriel, what’s happening?”

“Your brother’s happening, that’s what. He went from holding the bond back to shifting it into overdrive. He forced his soul and Castiel’s grace together, a process that is supposed to take decades in Heaven.”

Sam grimaced. “Can we do anything?”

“I’m working on it, Sammy, give me some time.”

-

**_Day Two_ **

-

“We’ve got to get Castiel out of Dean. His Grace is shredding itself trying to heal everything at once.”

Sam nodded. “Should we call Jimmy?”

“No time.” Gabriel sighed. “I’m sorry, Sam, but can you carry him?”

Sam blinked before nodding. “Yeah, give him to me.”

“It’s going to hurt…”

“He’s my brother.”

-

**_Day Six_ **

-

Sam took another long drink from the whiskey bottle, trying to drown the unceasing burn in his chest from Castiel’s grace. Gabriel ran a hand through his hair soothingly.

“How is it?”

“Better than yesterday,” Sam murmured weakly. “Less ‘I’m back in the Cage’ and more ‘I have seriously bad heartburn.’”

-

**_Day Ten_ **

-

“You two are driving me crazy.” Bobby complained at them for the millionth time.

Sam sighed, rubbing the sore spot on his chest where Castiel had taken up residence.

“What are we supposed to do, Bobby? Gabriel says we have to let them wake on their own.”

Bobby leaned over, sliding a bottle of Jack Daniels to Sam and a bottle of blue holy water to Gabriel.

“Get drunk. And stay out of the cellar.”

-

**_Day Sixteen_ **

-

Dean stretched, grunting against the ache of his joints and muscles as his body protested his awakening. He felt horrible, his stomach queasy and every single inch of his body hurt. What was worse was the mind-numbing emptiness that he felt in the pit of his stomach.

“Gabriel, stop it.” Sam’s voice from the hallway followed by Gabriel’s laughter.

Dean groaned softly, trying to roll over but he couldn’t move. Every synapse was on fire, as if he’d been scorched from the inside out. He tried to reach out for Cas but there was nothing, only emptiness.

Empty.

“Cas!” he yelped hoarsely, trying to shove his body up. He recognized the smell of Bobby’s coffee and could hear the older hunter in the kitchen, gruffing about something, and the sounds of Sam and Gabriel in the hallway. Otherwise, he was alone. “CAS!”

_Oh God, I killed him. I killed him and he’s dead and it’s all my fault and…_

“Easy there, tiger.” Gabriel was abruptly there and laid a hand firmly on his chest, pushing him back down onto the bed. It wasn’t hard to do by human standards, let alone angelic. He was just so weak, he couldn’t imagine the state Castiel was in. “Cas is fine. We just needed to get him out of you for a little while. Sam’s got him.”

Dean looked from Gabriel to where his brother now stood by the doorway. Sam didn’t look any different but if he tried, he could see the tiniest blue pulse inside his chest.

“What happened?” he gasped and Gabriel flicked him on the forehead.

“You pulled Castiel’s grace inside your soul, muttonhead. Effective at completing your bond but really, and I mean _really_ , stupid. You couldn’t have been more stupid if you drank a gallon of gasoline and then lit a cigarette. That much energy in that tight of a space…you’re lucky that neither you didn’t explode…nor did Cas implode.”

“I feel like I exploded.”

Gabriel laughed, shaking his head. “Trust me, you didn’t. You just need to rest for a while. Good news is you did complete your bond so you get to explore all the fun new side effects!”

Sam cleared his throat and Gabriel sighed. “Right, right, I’ll leave you two alone now, brotherly bonding and all that jazz.”

Dean rolled his eyes as Sam made his way over to the bed and Gabriel leaned up to kiss Sam’s cheek before patting Dean’s head.

“Friendly reminder that your boyfriend has now been inside your brother.”

“Oh, gross…” Dean groaned, batting the archangel away.

Once he was gone, Sam sank down onto the bed next to him. For a while, he said nothing and Dean slowly came back into contact with his body. He realized that underneath the grating blankets he was completely naked.

“Okay, who undressed me?”

Sam laughed. “I did. You were trying to pull them off anyway, kept muttering things about them cutting your skin. You were really out of it.”

“Cas, what about Cas?”

“Gabriel took him out on the second day after we realized he was just as damaged as you were. I figured if you could hold him, so could I. It wasn’t exactly pleasant but he carved himself out a little niche and went to sleep somewhere around here.”

Sam laid his hand over the tiny blue pulse Dean could see in his chest. “He’s not heavy and it doesn’t hurt anymore so don’t worry. Gabriel says his Grace is replenishing itself faster than normal which is good. Jimmy apparently could feel it when you two went nuclear and he’s been phoning almost nonstop. Did you know that he and Amelia had a little boy a few months back?”

Dean frowned, biting back a jealous retort as he reminded himself that technically he’d been sleeping with Amelia’s husband. Sam laughed, reading his thoughts from the look on his face.

“Relax, Simon’s almost six months old which means he was conceived three months before you and Cas got together. Jimmy sent me a picture, the kid’s adorable.”

Dean nodded, letting his head fall back before something Sam said connected with him.

“The second day? I’ve been out for two days?”

Sam laughed, once again having to push him back down on the bed. “You’ve been out for two weeks.”

“Two weeks!?” Dean started to sit up again despite the ache in his muscles. Sam held him down with one hand and Dean sighed, resolving himself to lying still for the time being.

 “Cas was freaking out when we got to you, we couldn’t get him to calm down. He was expending too much Grace trying to heal you, that’s one of the reasons we pulled him out. He tried to take control of me at first but he was too tired. I actually just sort of said ‘Go to bed, Cas.’ and he mumbled something before going to sleep. He’s been out most of the past week.”

Dean frowned, his brow furrowing as he looked up at his brother. “You seem pretty calm.”

Sam laughed. “I’m actually pretty drunk. Gabriel is too. I was afraid you were never going to wake up, Gabriel was afraid for Castiel and because I was afraid and it kept compounding… That’s one thing I’m sure you’ll enjoy.”

“What?”

“Shared emotions,” Sam explained calmly. “Shared everything. Gabriel says our bond is completing faster than normal. I woke up one morning and had all these feelings that weren’t mine. It’s pretty cool, when I’m tired, he can buzz me up. When he’s sad, I can push happiness at him. But when we were both scared, Bobby said it was like this cloud of fear was hanging over the house, our fear just multiplying with each other’s.”

“So Bobby made you get drunk.”

“He said I was a happy drunk and Gabriel was a sad drunk so the two of us would balance again. It worked pretty well.”

Dean laughed weakly, shaking his head, and Sam suddenly grabbed his hand. “Here, I think Cas is dreaming.”

Sam placed his hand on his chest and beneath his palm, Dean could feel the blue pulse fluttering wildly and he felt a pang of fear that wasn’t his own.

“Easy, Cas, it’s okay.” He breathed, running his thumb lightly over the pulse, soothing. “It’s okay, I’m here.”

He thought back to what Sam had just said about sharing emotions and tried to reach out to Cas, pushing comfort and happiness towards him. Slowly, the pulse beneath his hand calmed back to a steady thrum.

“Dean…”

“What?”

“Can you, um, stop stroking my chest? It’s kind of…uncomfortable.”

Dean blinked before retracting his hand quickly, shaking his head, his face contorted with disgust.

“Can you seriously get my boyfriend out of you now?”

“Will when he wakes up.” Sam sighed. “Right now, he needs rest just as much as you do.”

Dean nodded and Sam squeezed his shoulder before pulling the blankets up.

“Sleep well, Dean.”

Dean muttered something noncommittally and waved him away, pulling the blankets up to his chin and rolling onto his side. It didn’t take long for him to fall back into a deep sleep, and hopefully a dreamless one.

For once, he got his wish.

* * *

“Yeah, Dean was awake yesterday so I’m sure Cas will be up and about soon.” Sam pinned the phone between his shoulder and ear, flipping the eggs for his breakfast as he listened to Jimmy fret.

“You know, I could do that in like…three seconds.” Gabriel complained from the living room.

“Defeats the point, Gabe…yes, I’m sure he’ll be all right. Gabriel is keeping a close watch on him.”

-

In his home in Illinois, Jimmy shifted the six-month-old Simon in his arms so he could take the bottle Amelia offered him. The boy gurgled happily, eating his breakfast with gusto. Jimmy smiled down at him before turning his attention back to the conversation with Sam.

“It’s been over a week, Sam. Are you sure…”

-

Sam laughed. “For the hundredth time, Jimmy, Castiel will be fine. So will Dean. I’ll call you as soon as I have something new to report.”

After a few more minutes of reassuring Jimmy, Sam was able to get off the phone to find the rest of his breakfast already cooked.

“Gabriel…not funny.”

“No, not funny. Fast. Now hurry up and eat. I’ve been alone in here for ten minutes.”

Sam rolled his eyes, picking up his plate and carrying it to the living room. “I have a needy boyfriend.”

“Shut up.” Gabriel grunted, pushing his way under Sam’s arms so he could sit in his lap and took the plate from him.

“You’re not feeding me.” Sam laughed.

“Didn’t I say shut up?”

“You’re lucky you’re adorable.”

Gabriel laughed and leaned up for a kiss but Sam turned his head away.

“Sam…”

“Gabriel, I told you. No kissing while Cas is inside me.”

“It’s been a week!”

“It’s weird.”

“He’s asleep! …no, Sam…no puppy eyes…stop it…fine. Whatever.”

Gabriel shifted in his lap, proceeding to pout, but Sam wrapped his arms around him tightly, squeezing his shoulders.

“Archangels aren’t supposed to pout.” Sam murmured into his hair.

“Archangels can do whatever they want. Particularly _this_ archangel.”

“Whatever.” Sam laughed. “Feed me. My arms are busy.”

“I’ll feed you something.” Gabriel complained even as he retook up the plate, attacking the eggs until he had a forkful and he held them out for Sam.

* * *

The sun was setting and Dean hadn’t stirred again. Gabriel was certain it was because Castiel was still resting and, claiming the same, Sam stretched out on the couch and passed out. Gabriel watched him for the longest time, threading his fingers through Sam’s long hair as his mate snored softly. He thought back to all the times he’d crossed paths with Sam Winchester. He had felt it back then and ignored it? The slight tug? A hint of more?

Had he been too depressed and cynical to see it before now?

Gabriel bent and pressed a kiss to Sam’s forehead before slipping out of Bobby’s house and stretching his wings. A quick flight and he’d be back before Sam woke up.

* * *

Kali finished fixing her make-up, frowning at the image in the mirror. She wouldn’t look like a lovesick fool for anyone, particularly not for Gabriel. If he wanted to slut around with humans, that was no problem of hers. Her own sigh masked the almost imperceptible sound of wings and when she looked up, there was a lovely young creature reclining in the chair behind her. He had shoulder-length curly blond hair and piercing gray-blue eyes, the line of her lips soft and inviting even as he smirked.

“Well, Kali, you’re looking more depressed than usual.” She laughed and Kali spun, a blade half-drawn before she recognized him.

“Aphrodite…what are you doing here?”

She stood and smoothed her black slacks, a black pants suit a fairly plain get up for the goddess of love, but he had found simplicity had its uses sometimes.

“I came to see how you were doing. First the buzz was all about how Loki is actually Gabriel, the archangel, and now it’s all about how Gabriel found his mate and it’s a human boy named Sam Winchester. That has to sting, doesn’t it?”

Kali turned back to her mirror, fighting the urge to set Aphrodite’s hair on fire when the goddess leaned against her boudoir. The blond beauty tilted his head, smiling at her.

“Go away if you’re not going to be of any use.” Kali snapped, but it lacked any malice.

“Oh, I’m of use,” Aphrodite smiled, handing her a small crystal vial full of a red liquid.

Kali took the vial gingerly, looking up at Aphrodite curiously, and he smiled.

“Sam Winchester’s blood. I thought you might like to have some fun before learning how to properly torch an archangel’s wings.”

Kali couldn’t help but smile. “You always did know how to cheer me up.”

Aphrodite slid a hand beneath her chin, using her thumb to correct Kali’s lipstick before smudging it again with his own lips.

“Give me a front row seat, my dear, and all is even.”

Aphrodite turned and headed out the bedroom door, sauntering down the stairs as she smirked, and spread his wings to fly north.

* * *

Castiel woke slowly, disoriented, and he stretched his Grace, seeking out Dean. After being pinched and forced inside Dean’s soul, his Grace was torn in several places, but it began healing almost immediately after he woke. He pushed himself to his feet, barely aware that he had to stretch his Grace unusually far to fill his vessel but he likened it to the way his Grace had been battered in the past few days. He pushed himself to his feet and jumped in surprise when Bobby came around the corner, the elder hunter not looking up from the book he was carrying.

“Hey, kid, go see if you can get Dean up. Gabe took off an hour ago while you were napping and a friend of mine just called. Needs some help dealing with an exorcism and I figured they could use an angel.”

Castiel nodded slowly, flinching against the headache the movement caused, noting that his vessel seemed taller than was normal. Still, it was probably just disorientation. He could barely see let alone solve whatever problem there was with Jimmy’s body at the time. He staggered slightly on the way to the bedroom, too exhausted to do more than fumble blindly, following his Grace to Dean’s side.

He flopped onto the bed and naturally curled up against his chest, Dean automatically slinging an arm over him. Castiel stretched wearily and leaned up to pepper Dean’s face with kisses.

_Wake up, Dean._ He thought and Dean murmured something unintelligible before tugging him closer.

“Cas…”

Castiel brushed their lips together, relishing in the now familiar spark of their soul and grace meeting, and Dean purred against his lips. He felt Dean’s fingers thread through his hair and darted his tongue out to caress Dean’s bottom lip. Dean parted his lips naturally, welcoming him in.

_Demon hunt._ Castiel continued. _We have to go._

“Don wanna…” Dean grunted, sliding a hand beneath his shirt and Castiel moaned softly when Dean’s hand slipped between his shoulder blades.

“Dean…” he gasped and froze. At the same time, Dean stiffened next to him.

That was definitely not his voice. Dean jerked his hand out from under his shirt and slid back, putting several inches between them.

“Cas…please tell me you’re not still wearing my brother.”

Castiel blinked and for the first time took a good look at his vessel, wincing when he realized that he was doing just that. Dean groaned at his silence before rolling away from him, kicking his feet off the opposite side of the bed.

“Dean, I…”

“Sh… just… sh.” Dean sighed before motioning him over. Castiel slid over to sit next to him and Dean grabbed his wrist without opening his eyes.

“Go ahead, get back inside me.”

“Dean, I don’t think…”

“Just do it, Cas. Trust me.”

Castiel sighed but placed his hand on Dean’s head, letting his Grace flow back into Dean’s body. Oddly enough, it slotted perfectly inside, all the torn places matching to equally torn places in Dean’s soul. Castiel and Dean sighed in relief simultaneously and Castiel felt Dean lift his head to look up at Sam. Sam was shaking his head, trying to repress a laugh before he got to his feet.

“This is going on that list of things we never talk about, deal?”

“Deal.” Dean responded gruffly.

The moment Sam was gone, Dean stood up, stretching his arms above his head.

“You okay, Cas?”

_Embarrassed, mostly._ Castiel said softly from the back of his mind and Dean couldn’t help but smile.

“Why? Nothing happened. You’ve been with me this whole time. Of course, we’ve been passed out for like two weeks or something but, geez, why are you embarrassed? I’m the one who’s naked here.”

Castiel chuckled and nudged Dean lightly. Dean stepped aside, letting him take control and Castiel stretched, stepping over to shut the door and then stopped in front of the full length mirror by the closet. He slid a hand up over his chest and Dean felt himself flush at the way Castiel’s gaze raked over him appreciatively.

“I want you to see something, Dean.”

Dean shivered involuntarily at the sound of Castiel’s grace rolling over his vocal cords, making his voice sound husky with need. He knew his own naked body quite well; he wasn’t sure what Castiel wanted to show him. Then Castiel was closing his eyes, his brow furrowing in concentration, and Dean felt a prickle between his shoulder blades.

When Castiel opened their eyes, Dean gasped softly at the sight of Castiel’s huge white wings extending from his back. Castiel had drawn one around him and cradled it in his arms, running his hand over the shimmering feathers and Dean gasped softly at the thrill of energy. Normally he felt it through his arm or whatever was touching Castiel’s wing but now he felt it through his entire body, coursing down his back, making his heart skip a beat.

“You’re an angel, Dean.”

Dean looked up at himself in the mirror, the bright wings extending around him, making his tanned skin appear even darker.

“No…I’m really not.”

Castiel chuckled as he fell back, letting Dean slip back into control and the wings lingered for a few moments before they fluttered back into the surreal. Dean swallowed hard. He could still feel their burn between his shoulder blades and he ran a hand through his hair to steady himself.

“Come on, Cas, we have a demon to hunt.”

_Clothes_. Castiel suggested when Dean headed for the door, still fully naked, and Dean cursed softly, turning on his heel and grabbing his clothes while Castiel laughed in the back of his mind.

* * *

The angel connected with Gabriel in mid-air. Bringing the archangel down was no easy task but she’d been shepherding the youngest for years and knew his weaknesses better than anyone. After all, he was the one who taught him everything.

Gabriel twisted and fought mid-air, recognizing the emerald black wings and fighting all the harder for it. He still ended up pinned against the mountain wall somewhere in the Alps, his wings fluttering helplessly as the angel held a silver blade an inch from his neck.

“Long time no see, Lord Gabriel.”

Gabriel fought against the arm pinning him. “What do you want, Samael?”

Samael smiled eerily, the angel’s beauty a mask for her cruel and resolute ways.

“I’ve come to deliver a warning.”

Gabriel scoffed. “I’m no threat to you. The bind Michael put on my wings is still there. I’m barely an archangel anymore.”

“You aren’t a threat but _he_ is.” Samael purred into his ear.

Gabriel stiffened, clenching his jaw. “You leave him alone. You hear me?”

“I will, Gabriel. I swear it, as long as you abide by my words. Keep Castiel out of Heaven or I will burn everything you love to ash.”

Samael pushed off and Gabriel tried not to tremble against the mountain wall. Samael stopped a few feet away, snapping his fingers and a ring of holy oil burst into flame around Gabriel.

“I want you to sit here and watch what I have planned for Sam Winchester. Just a taste, I promise you, of what I’m capable of.”

“Don’t you dare hurt him!” Gabriel cried, lunging forward, barely able to stop himself before he crossed the flames.

Samael laughed, her gray-blue eyes sparkling mishievously. “I’m not going to lay a hand on him. Just watch.”

* * *

Sam was pacing as Dean and Castiel came downstairs. He closed his cell and handed Dean a piece of paper where he’d jotted down the address.

“It’s a small church a few miles south of here. The priest was called in on a demon exorcism but the demon isn’t responding to the normal incantation. They’ve got it in a devil’s trap and subdued so I figured you and Cas could take care of it. I want to wait here for Gabriel to get back.”

“Yeah, sure,” Dean shrugged as he took the paper. “With Cas, it’ll probably take like five seconds anyway.”

_Ask him if he’s okay._

Dean rolled his eyes but looked up at his brother. “Cas wants to know if you’re okay.”

He frowned, noticing how pale Sam suddenly seemed, a slight sweat breaking out on his forehead. “ _Are_ you okay? You don’t look good.”

“Just…worried. Gabriel…”

“Oh.” Dean nodded. “Yeah, I know what that’s like. He’ll be back, okay?”

Dean lightly tapped Sam’s shoulder and Sam gave him a tired smile. “Be careful. Call me if you need me.”

“Here.” Dean fished the keys to the Impala out of his pocket and handed them to Sam. “In case you need to make a supply run or something. Cas and I are going to fly over.”

_Really?_ Castiel commented excitedly and Dean laughed.

“Yeah, you better steer though. I’m probably shit at flying.”

Sam watched as his brother stepped outside, recognizing when Castiel took control by the tell-tale way he straightened his shoulders, rolling his back before stretching his wings. They were gone in an instant and Sam sank weakly into the nearest chair.

It was back, the hunger. It was why he couldn’t go on this hunt, why he couldn’t help with the exorcism. He didn’t trust himself. He wanted it, craved it, needed it in ways he hadn’t needed it in years.

Demon blood.


	9. Pulse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel go after a demon, unaware that Gabriel is trapped and Sam is going off the deep end.
> 
> [R for graphic violence, rape]

By nightfall, Sam couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t see straight. His poor attempt at eating dinner in hopes of curving off the edge of the craving had ended with him curled over the toilet, puking his guts out. Every second he prayed Bobby wouldn’t hear the breakdown he was having. Bobby had spent most of the night in the cellar and Sam was fine with that.

He tried to think of something, anything, that might’ve triggered why his cravings for demon blood were back. He felt like he had when Dean and Bobby had locked him in the panic room. He felt like he _should_ be locked in the panic room, but every single time he tried to walk towards the stairs, he nearly fell over from a sudden surge of dizziness. The whole room faded in and out, wherever he looked.

Stumbling back into the living room, Sam half fell onto the couch, his gaze falling on the keys on the table. It was the only thing he could see clearly, the keys to the Impala. The urge to grab them and go for a drive was just as strong as the urge to call Dean and Cas, tell them not to worry about it, and go drain that demon of every drop before God and anyone else who felt like watching.

Going for a drive was the less violent of the two options so he leaned forward and grabbed the keys. He didn’t stumble once on the way to the Impala and by the time he was in the driver’s seat, he was calm and relaxed again. He slid the key into the ignition and the familiar purr of the engine was like music to his ears.

“Gabriel, if you can hear me, I’m just going for a drive to clear my head. I’m…not feeling well, I think it may be withdrawal from where Cas was inside me or something. But just…call me when you get back or something.” He whispered. It occurred to him that he maybe should’ve left a note but when he looked back at the house, his head swam.

So he put the car in first gear and eased it out onto the road. Just a quick run into town and back and maybe he’d be feeling better then. Gabriel would probably be back by then and they could finally get up to some things they couldn’t do when Dean and Castiel had been indisposed.

* * *

Castiel flew them quickly to the address that Sam had written down for them, landing in the driveway of the quaint country home. It was bright and sunny out, golden sunflowers growing in the front garden. It looked nothing like there was a demonic exorcism going on inside but Castiel stayed in control as they headed up the front steps.

 _Cas?_ Dean nudged him. _I want to do this._

“I will let you, Dean, just let me make sure everything’s okay first.”

Dean tried to roll his eyes but nothing happened so he settled for mentally huffing and sitting down in the back of his own mind. Castiel knocked on the door, waiting quietly until the mistress of the house answered, greeting them with a smile.

“You must be…one of the Winchesters?”

“Yes, this is Dean Winchester and I am the angel, Castiel, speaking through him for now.”

She looked a bit confused but nodded anyway, stepping back so they could enter. The dark circles beneath her eyes and the way strands of hair fell into her face from a haphazard ponytail said it had been a long and trying time for her.

“T-the priest is in the living room with…with it. I can’t…I…”

“It’s all right.” Castiel said warmly, touching her shoulder. “We’ll take it from here.”

She nodded slowly and disappeared into what looked like the kitchen, picking up a half-empty bottle of wine from the counter. Dean nudged Castiel and the angel let him slide forward into control.

“What do you see?”

_There is a demon in there but there are enough containment sigils in place you should not be in danger. We need to determine why the demon is unresponsive to the exorcism incantation._

“Right.”

Dean stepped forward, heading down the hall where Castiel had indicated. As he turned the corner at the end of the hallway, he could see the demon chained in a chair in the center of a devil’s trap. It was an older male, mid-50s, no doubt the husband or father of the family. Dean started towards him.

“Think we can get him out without killing the guy?”

_It’s probable._

“Okay, let’s do this.”

He started towards the demon and suddenly the man looked up, staring at him with wide, fear-filled eyes. Dean started to smirk. Demons were afraid of the sight of him now.

“No, wait! It’s a trap!”

Dean froze but it was too late, he’d already stepped into the living room and Castiel screamed in the back of his mind. He grabbed at the angel but Castiel was already gone, forced out of his body. His soul was howling at the absence of his mate; he had no idea how far away Castiel was and he fell to his hands and knees, gasping against the pain. It faded, slowly, and then he felt a hand in his hair, jerking his head up.

He came face to face with a young priest but behind the clean-shaven man he could see the demon’s true face. Dean didn’t know how he could see her, but, more than that, he recognized her.

“Ruby…” he gasped. “How…I killed you.”

“Yeah, you did.” She laughed through the naive voice of the priest. He couldn’t be older than 20. What was he doing here? “But my Father brought me back for my loyal service. Of course, I didn’t get a chance to come visit my favorite boys. I was having too much fun in the Middle East, slaughtering thousands, and Michael still had his eye on you so Daddy told me to wait my turn. He said he’d let me have your soul for my own personal chew toy after he killed Michael. But then you trapped him back in the Cage and I had to come get my desserts all on my own.”

“You bitch…”

Ruby laughed, hauling him up and slamming him against the wall. Dean felt his ribs crack with the blow and he struggled to breathe.

“Now here you are, fucking an angel. What gives you the _right?_ I’ve seen what you did in Hell, Dean, you’re no better than me.”

Dean laughed weakly, trying to move but she had him pinned. The Knife was digging into his back, if only he could reach it. “Yeah, well, if you’re going to kill me, you better hurry up. I have one hell of a possessive boyfriend and you just shoved him out of his vessel. If he hits this place without a condom on, I’m the only one who won’t burn.”

He saw the fear in her eyes at that. “Dammit, I wanted to have some fun. Why do you always have to burst my bubble?”

She slammed him onto the floor and he tried to hit her but the blow she leveled into his jaw was enough to snap it. Black spots danced in front of his vision and then her hands were around his throat, choking him. The man chained in the chair was yelling, yelling for his wife, yelling for God, for someone, anyone to help. Dean would’ve laughed if he had the air.

God wasn’t coming. God never came when you called, not even when it was the goddamn Apocalypse on the line.

Dean struck out at Ruby, over and over again, trying to get air around her hands, trying to get her to let him go. She laughed at him, straddling his waist, taking his blows without flinching. He managed to pull the Knife out of his belt but she caught it and threw it to the side. He wasn’t getting out of this, not without help.

_Cas! CAS!_

He couldn’t feel the angel at all. It was strange, he wasn’t afraid that he was going to die. He was afraid that Castiel would be alone again. What would Castiel do if he died? Go into Hell to get him again and nearly get himself killed for it? Go to Heaven to join him and nearly get himself killed for it?

_Cas…_

He weakly reached up one last time as his vision started to go dark, his hand falling over Ruby’s face. Warmth flooded through him, peaceful and strong, and he felt himself frown. This wasn’t dying. Dying wasn’t peaceful, no matter what anyone told you. Dying was violent and desperate as your body overloaded trying to save itself.

He could hear screams, was he really going to Hell again? Guess God really didn’t like him fucking one of his boys. Who knew God would be an overprotective dad? Heat, searing heat at his hand, and then air flooded his lungs as hands scraped helplessly at his outstretched arm.

Dean opened his eyes to see light exploding out from his hand, burning into Ruby’s face. It was she who was screaming, trying desperately to get away from him.

“Cas?” He gasped weakly and Ruby kicked him hard across his already broken jaw, and he released her. She gasped, crawling to the other side of the room as her skin smoked.

Dean reached out for Castiel but the angel still hadn’t returned. He got to his feet slowly just as Ruby did, her eyes wide and fearful as she stared at him.

“What are you!?” She shouted and Dean took a step back.

_What am I?_

He flashed back to that moment when Castiel had him standing in front of the mirror, Castiel’s wings stretched out behind them.

_You’re an angel, Dean._

“No…” He choked, his words mutilated by his broken jaw. “No way…”

_My soul and his grace are one…my soul and his grace…our soul…our grace…MY grace…_

Dean lunged forward and Ruby screamed as his hand closed over her throat, light pouring from his fingertips and she howled, writing beneath him. He poured his hate into it, anger at all she had done to Sam, manipulating him for so long, turning him against his own family, but still it wasn’t enough to finish the job. She gasped and begged for him to kill her but he didn’t have the juice.

Right when he was reaching back for the Knife, he felt a huge downstroke of wind and then Castiel was there, raising a hand and smiting Ruby with ease. She dissolved out of the priest’s body and Castiel stepped forward, catching him before he fell.

“Dean, are you all right?” Castiel’s voice, even over his own vocal cords, was like music to his ears.

“Yeah,” Dean gasped as Castiel fell back to heal his jaw and the forming bruises on his throat. “Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks to you.”

 _I did nothing._ Castiel said bitterly, still healing the hurt he’d sustained before Dean let him back into control and he walked over, breaking the man’s chains with a touch and healing him as well as the priest.

“Hell, you did everything.” Dean laughed. “When you marked me. That’s how I beat her, Cas, your grace…it was mine. It listened to me.”

_Huh…remarkable._

“You mean, that’s not normal?”

_Not remotely._

“But before…with the mirror? That wasn’t like foreshadowing or something?”

_Dean, I am very surprised you were able to draw on my grace. It is unprecedented._

“Great. I love being the first.”

Dean realized both the priest and the man who had been possessed were staring at him and he sighed. “Sorry for the one-sided conversation, angel in my head and all.”

_I am in your entire body, not just your head._

“Figure of speech, Cas.”

The priest stepped forward, looking at him as if he were trying to see past Dean’s skin to the angel underneath.

“I…I can’t believe it.”

“What?” Dean snapped, annoyed by the man’s proximity.

“Angels…demons…I always thought the battle between Heaven and Hell was more metaphorical than… _actual_ angels…”

“And demons.” Dean sighed, resolving himself to explaining the whole hunter life to this young priest. He deserved to know.

* * *

It had been seven hours since he left Bobby’s and Sam had no clue where he was. He parked the Impala at a motel and bought himself a room before going for a walk. The night air was clear and he hoped it would clear his head, but the same fuzziness around the edges of his mind was there. The craving hadn’t edged a bit. If anything it was worse: roaring in his ears, clouding his vision, and always determining which direction his steps took.

Then he smelled it, the most glorious scent in the world at that moment. Like wine over sweat-soaked skin, Sam could smell it. Turning the corner, he saw the demon, leaning over a young girl as he tried to talk her into coming home with him.

“Hey!”

The demon looked up and his grin widened, shoving the girl to one side. She stumbled, staring up at them with wide eyes, but Sam couldn’t see her. He could only see the blood pumping through the demon’s veins.

“Well, look, if it isn’t Sam Winchester, all alone…”

Sam doesn’t know where the strength comes from, the strength that knocks the demon back from the weight of his punch. The demon’s eyes go wide in surprise, blood leaking from his lip and Sam attacked his mouth, biting down on the wound until blood burst into his mouth. The demon must’ve mistook his intentions because he was suddenly kissing him back, roughly forcing his tongue into Sam’s mouth, fingers digging into his ass.

“You like that, kid?” The demon growled, noting the blood on Sam’s lips. “After all this time, you still want it. Good, I got plenty for you.”

Sam found himself on his back, the demon’s hips grinding down on his. He missed the fear in the demon’s eyes, too focused on the wound he’d just opened on his own neck. The demon fisted a hand in his hair, jerking his head away from his neck and flipping him over onto his stomach. He fought when he felt the demon pulling down his jeans, but then the girl was there, smoothing his hair back as she smiled at him with black eyes.

“Here, baby, I got you.”

She slit her wrist and Sam groaned at the taste of her blood on his tongue, forgetting about the demon behind him, raping him. As long as he had her blood, nothing else mattered.

It never ended. The demons didn’t seem too keen on dying but there was always a fresh body ready to take its place in front of him. Sam lost track of how many there had been, or even where he was. He knew he’d gone from asphalt to a bed of some sort and lost his clothes along the way, but the demon blood pumping through his system didn’t let him think about it. Or maybe it was something else that wouldn’t let him think, the same something that kept the demons coming to him.

He lost count of how many times he’d been forced onto his knees to be raped. Whenever the demon blood started to dry up, he would fight, push back, try to get away and he’d get pinned down again. Sometimes they’d wait to give it to him just so they could watch him struggle, hear him plead for them to stop, or to give him more. Sometimes…he forgot which one he wanted more: his freedom or the taste of blood.

* * *

“No, Dad, that strap goes here.”

Jimmy sighed but couldn’t stay frustrated for long with both Claire and Simon smiling up at him.

“I can remember over a thousand Enochian sigils and chants but I can’t fix a simple car seat.”

Claire laughed, laying a hand over his. “Hey, if it makes you feel better, I bet Castiel would have an even worse time trying.”

“Yeah, I bet!” Jimmy laughed then dropped his voice. “’I don’t understand the point of this, Dean. This combination of neoprene and polyethylene cannot under any circumstances be deemed safe.’”

Claire covered her mouth with her hands to stifle her giggles and Jimmy beamed up at her, finally pulling the last strap into place.

“There you go.” He tickled Simon briefly and the boy gurgled happily.

“Can you imagine if Dean and Cas have kids?” Claire laughed as Jimmy slid into the front seat, glancing towards the house for Amelia.

“Oh, I feel sorry for that kid. The two most stubbornly overprotective people in the universe for parents? Dean would meet any prospective friends/boyfriends/girlfriends at the door with a gun in one hand and a bottle of holy water in the other while Castiel would just obsessively stalk him or her while invisible.”

Claire shook her head, still giggling when Amelia joined them. “I think Dean and Cas would be great parents.”

“Hey, I never said they’d be bad at it. Just overprotective.”

“Come on, you two fangirls, don’t we talk about them enough?” Amelia couldn’t hide her smile though as she started the car, backing down the driveway. “Let’s just have a nice family night out. Ruby Tuesdays is having a special…”

Jimmy glanced back at Claire before they both burst out laughing and Amelia groaned.

“Okay, _what_ is funny now?”

* * *

Dean pulled off his boots at the doorstep and sighed, grabbing a spare change of clothes before locking himself in the bathroom.

_Dean…_

“Look, I know you can mojo me clean but I really just want a hot shower, ok? It’s a human thing.”

_As you wish._

Dean grinned, running a hand through his hair before he stripped, letting his clothes fall on the floor.

“I will be seriously glad when you get Jimmy back. Not that I mind having you inside but…”

_I miss sex too._

Dean laughed out, cutting the water on and turning it up as hot as it would go. He didn’t feel heat the same way when Castiel was inside him, and he wanted a _hot_ shower. Stepping inside the shower, he remembered the last time he and Castiel had been in there together. The hot water pounded against his back, but it had been cold that day. Even the cold water hadn’t been enough to slow them down, six years of sexual tension that he hadn’t let himself feel until it was almost too late, all bubbling and boiling into one desperate and needy fuck in Bobby’s shower. That had been over a year ago.

Castiel was humming pleasantly in his head at the memory and Dean smiled, taking the shower gel Sam had left in the shower and pouring some into his hand. He slid his hand between his legs and smiled, resting an arm against the shower wall as he stroked himself.

_Dean_

“You feel that, Cas?” he murmured.

_Yes_

“Good. Pay attention.”

Caught up in the feel of his own hand and the way Castiel moved against and inside him, the angel’s arousal coiling against the inside of his chest, Dean didn’t hear his phone buzzing in the pocket of his jeans.

* * *

“DAMMIT!”

Gabriel cursed as he closed his cell phone, both cursing and grateful for the day he’d decided to get one. Dean just needed to pick it up. He could feel the distress rolling off of Sam, the anguish, the pain, the need…

“Dammit, Samael, what are you doing to him?”

But Samael was long gone. Gabriel’s wings were singed from where he’d been thrashing, trying to break through the ring of fire. He crouched down, tears carving furrows through the soot and blood on his face. He was losing Sam and there was nothing he could do about it.

* * *

“I have five missed calls from some random number…” Dean groused, jeans hanging loosely from his hips. He had yet to put a shirt on as his skin was still damp.

_That’s Gabriel’s cellular phone number._

“Gabriel has a cell phone?”

_Yes. Sam requested it._

Dean sighed before hitting redial and waiting for the archangel to pick up. “What’s up, Sparkles?”

_“DEAN YOU IDIOT I’M GOING TO STRANGLE YOU! WHERE’S SAM!?”_

Dean froze, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest. The Impala had been gone when they got back, but Dean assumed that Sam and Gabriel had gone off somewhere together. Castiel barely let him out of his sight, he’d thought Gabriel would be the same way with Sam.

“W-what do you mean, where’s Sam? I thought he was with you.” He tried his best to keep his voice steady but he was already coming up with all the worst possibilities for where Sam could be.

_“He’s in trouble, Dean, you have to find him.”_

“What about you? Can’t you use your angel mojo or bond or something?”

_“I’m TRAPPED, okay?! Samael caught me in holy oil, I can’t move. Trust me, I’ve been trying.”_

_Dean, I have Gabriel’s location._

“Look, Cas is on his way to get you. I’ll find Sam.”

_“Thank you. Dean…hurry.”_

“Yeah, ok.”

Dean felt Castiel pull out of him and immediately dialed Sam’s number. His heart hit the floor when it went straight to voicemail.

* * *

Jimmy felt it when Castiel left Dean’s body, felt his grace wash over him, but Castiel wasn’t coming to him. Castiel was searching for something, for someone. Jimmy glanced back at Claire and from the look in her eyes, he knew she felt it too. She bit her lip and turned to the window, looking up at the sky as if she might see him, and Jimmy found himself leaning forward to look out through the windshield.

Amelia looked from him to Claire then up at the sky. “What is it?”

Jimmy glanced down at her then his eyes widened. “Amelia!”

The truck hit them hard, connecting with Amelia and Claire’s side of the car, pushing them, rolling them over. Jimmy felt pain erupt in his stomach and he called out for his wife, his daughter, his son. The car spun on its roof as another connected with them, and Jimmy squeezed his eyes shut.

When the world was still again, they were right side up again. The world faded in and out and he could hear sirens. He coughed and tasted blood, glancing down to where it seemed he’d merged with his own door. It was with great effort that he turned his head, looking into the backseat. Claire’s eyes were wide and empty, as were Amelia’s, but Simon’s cries were loud and woeful.

Slowly, he let his head fall back against the seat. “Take care of him…Cas…you promised…”

* * *

“Yeah, just, um…do whatever it is you cops do. Just call me first, ok? I don’t need him getting swarmed by SWAT.”

Dean hung up, hoping beyond hope that Sheriff Mills could find the Impala. That would at least give them a location, where the hell could Sam be at this time of night? He had several hours head start if he’d left shortly after he and Cas had, and that left so many open possibilities.

Dean pressed against his and Castiel’s bond, drawing comfort from Castiel’s confidence.

Bobby looked over at him worriedly, guilty for not paying more attention, but they’d already swept the place. There were no signs of demonic activity, or angel activity, or supernatural activity of any kind. Sam had just up and decided to leave. It was only on Gabriel’s word that he was in trouble.

Dean wondered when he’d started trusting the archangel so much.

* * *

Gabriel breathed a sigh of relief when he felt Castiel near. The wind whipped into a fury at the presence of the angel in his true form, the flames dying under the whirlwind of snow, and Gabriel ran into his brother’s arms.

“We’ll find him.” Castiel murmured, the mountains echoing with his voice. “Go to Dean. He is worried as well. The two of you can search for Sam; I must return to Jimmy before I can proceed.”

“Yeah,” Gabriel nodded, wiping tears from his eyes. “Yeah, hurry back, okay?”

Castiel nodded and Gabriel spread his wings, not trusting himself to move much faster quite yet.

* * *

Sam groaned, his head pounding against the light that was burning through the windows. He slowly pushed himself up, his entire body aching, and he reached out to push the nearest demon away from him before he realized it wasn’t a demon anymore.

It was a corpse.

He spun, looking around him. At least a dozen, possibly more, demons lay around him in various stages of undress. Every single one of them was dead and he didn’t have to check to know each one had been drained of blood.

He could feel every drop coursing through him like acid, wildfire that surged and seared its way through him now that he was awake. He grabbed a pair of shades from one of the bodies and found some clothes that fit relatively well. Suddenly, he didn’t feel any guilt for their deaths. The hunger was returning. How long had it been since his last drink? Since his last kill?

There was another demon a few towns over. If he left now, he could be there in an hour. 

* * *

 


	10. Desperate Times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel and Dean search for a missing Sam.

Arthur Aimes was an ordinary man with an ordinary job. He’d always been ordinary, for as far back as he could remember which was roughly 50 years or so, minus the early years. He’d been in the army where he’d become a makeshift doctor, and then gone to medical school. He was a surgeon for ten years before becoming a post-mortem medical examiner. He had worked at three hospitals before this one, but he was happy at Livingston County Memorial Hospital.

Today he’d had to autopsy and tag a family who’d died in a car crash. He felt a certain relief that they had all gone out together until he found out that the six-month old boy had survived. An orphan, alone in this world, forced to step out on his own. Then again, the prospects for such a young child to be adopted were good. Perhaps this Simon Novak would grow up never even knowing of the family that had died before its time.

He was finishing up for the night when the lights began to flicker in the morgue, growing brighter and brighter until they began to pop and burst, sparks littering the floor. He hobbled towards the fire alarm, an old war round in his hip prohibiting him from moving very fast, and then the light seemed to condense behind the door of one of the coolers. It grew and he could see the door outlined by the fierce light, and then all was still again.

Arthur Aimes blinked in the sudden darkness, the memory of the light creating shadow images against his eyelids. A loud metallic sound hit his ears and he flinched as the door of the cooler opened of its own will, the tray sliding out. He couldn’t see the tag, but he knew that was the cooler he’d just set the father of the Novak family in earlier that evening. What had his name been? Jerry? Joey?

Jimmy Novak sat up, the plastic sheet falling around his waist as the wounds in his body melted away. Pale skin grew flushed and warm as the blood began flowing through his veins again, and Arthur Aimes slid to the ground, clutching at the golden cross he’d worn since he was a boy.

Castiel slid his feet off the table, checking his body once more for any remaining injuries. _His_ body, Jimmy’s soul was no longer contained within it. He swallowed the lump in his throat; he could not mourn for Jimmy yet. Sam was missing and he needed to find him.

The tray slid back into the cooler and he shut the door, turning to find the medical examiner staring at him in shock. He stepped over to him and knelt by him.

“I am very sorry for this.”

Castiel touched his forehead, erasing the memory of his revival, and he unclipped the man’s security pass from his jacket before heading out. He found a pair of scrubs and a white coat and dressed quickly, clipping the pass to his pocket.

He had a promise to keep.

* * *

Gabriel flew back to Bobby’s and landed on the living room floor on his knees in a flurry of ash and snow.

“Well, that wasn’t one of my better landings.”

He felt hands on his shoulders and Dean was hauling him up like he weighed nothing at all, pushing him into a chair.

“You look like you lost a fight with a volcano.” Dean huffed, pouring him a tumbler of holy water which Gabriel accepted gratefully. The grace in the water didn’t go to making him drunk. Instead it filled in the torn and damaged splits in his grace until he felt like some semblance of himself again.

“I think I’d take the volcano over Samael.” Gabriel murmured wearily before pushing himself to his feet again. “We have to go. We have to find Sam.”

“Gabriel, what happened?” Dean snapped, pushing him back down into the chair. “How do you know Sam’s in trouble?”

“Because I know Samael!” Gabriel half-shouted, desperation clouding his judgment even as Dean looked back at him sadly. “Samael doesn’t do things half-way, he’ll try and destroy Sam, take him from me, just to prove that she can if she wants.

“Why’s this Samael guy doing this anyway?”

Gabriel ran a hand through his hair, hesitating, and Dean bit back a curse.

“Tell me the truth, Gabriel! Crap, you’re dating my brother and now whatever shit it is that you’re not telling us has gotten my brother dragged into it! I have seen too many problem blown way out of proportion because of shit like this!”

“You’re one to talk!” Gabriel quipped.

“Dammit, Gabriel!”

“It has to do with Cas, okay?” Gabe shouted, flinching at the stunned look on Dean’s face.

Dean’s voice dropped to barely above a whisper, worry and fear creeping through. “Cas? What about Cas?”

“There’s a prophecy, just like the one about you and Sam being vessels but even older, written by the same man who put words to the angels’ voices.” Gabriel explained quickly, knowing Dean wouldn’t act until he knew. “Only archangels know of it, and I wasn’t sure, but now I am. Samael’s threatening me to keep Castiel out of Heaven because of this prophecy and that’s why he’s attacking Sam. I will tell you _everything,_ I promise, just please…we have to find Sam first. The rest can wait.”

Dean slowly nodded, swallowing hard against the compounding worry. “Where do we start?”

“I can sense him, just barely, but those Enochian sigils Castiel branded on the both of you are still working. If we take to the sky, I can find the Impala and circle out from there.”

“I’m going with you.”

Gabriel nodded. “You might want to ammo up. Demons are popping up all over the place. I think Samael is summoning and controlling them.”

“An angel can do that?”

“Angels can do many things.” Gabriel said bitterly, swallowing another mouthful of holy water for the strength it provided.

Dean nodded and tucked both the Knife and the Colt into his belt, making sure his flask was full of holy water and the shotgun was packed with salt rounds. Bobby did the same, murmuring under his breath about ‘idjit angels’ and ‘stubborn brats.’

“I’ll follow in the truck. I got something to check on first.” The elder hunter murmured, heading to the cellar.

Gabriel and Dean nodded to Bobby and Dean zipped up his jacket quickly, following Gabriel out into the yard.

“Where do you want me?”

“On my back.”

Castiel was only two inches shorter than him and it had felt weird crawling onto his back. Gabriel’s vessel was _much_ shorter and still the archangel hefted him easily, spreading his wings wide. Being right up next to him, Dean got his first real sense of just how big Gabriel’s wings were and how small and fragile he was.

“Shit.” Dean murmured and sacrificed his dignity to wrap himself around Gabriel’s waist and neck.

“I won’t drop you, idiot.” Gabriel murmured tiredly.

“Just find Sam, okay?”

Gabriel nodded and a moment later, they were airborne.

* * *

Gabriel flew nearly twice as fast as Castiel, though Castiel hadn’t been searching for something during their last flight together. Dean swore a few times as Gabriel dove closer to the ground, barely skimming above the buildings. All someone would have to do was look up and see them, but then he realized Gabriel probably had them cloaked somehow. Once he got used to the wind resistance, Dean knelt on his back so he could peer over Gabriel’s shoulder, looking for the tell-tale glimmer of his car.

“There!”

The wind whipped the words from his lips, but Gabriel heard anyway and the next second they had dropped, landing next to the Impala. Dean stumbled forward a few steps as Gabriel shook out his wings and tucked them away. He unzipped his jacket and looked up at the motel.

“Dean…”

The keys to the Impala and to the hotel room were on the front driver side tire. Dean cursed, taking the keys and checking the room anyway. It obviously hadn’t been slept in. Sam probably hadn’t even gone inside.

Gabriel followed him a few minutes later, carrying one of Sam’s shirts from the back seat of the Impala.

“I’m going to see if I can get his exact location.” Gabriel said quietly, pulling the table into the center of the room. Dean frowned, watching the archangel’s slow but determined movements.

“Dude, you’re running on empty. I’ve never seen you this drained before.”

Gabriel sighed, pushing a hand through his hair in a too-human gesture. “Fighting Samael, trying to get out of the trap, it’s all put a huge strain on my grace. I haven’t been this weak in a long time.”

“But you’re an _archangel_.”

“Poor excuse for one.” Gabriel breathed, drawing the sigil. “I ran away, Dean. You can’t cut off an archangel the way you can ordinary angels, our grace doesn’t fade. But it can be bound.”

He tugged down the collar of his shirt, showing Dean the edge of a brand on his back. Dean’s eyes widened, touching the scarred flesh to a shudder from Gabriel.

“Who…”

“Who do you think?”

Dean swallowed, remembering how Gabriel had spoken of Michael. Gabriel sighed and Dean caught his shoulders as the archangel swayed on the spot.

“I don’t care what you said, Gabe, I’m nothing like him. I wouldn’t do this to my brother.”

“Yeah,” Gabriel said softly. “Yeah, I know that now. Can you…can you hold me up so I can finish this sigil?”

Dean tightened his grip on the archangel’s shoulders, shifting to support his weight. “Yeah, I got you.”

Gabriel smeared his own blood over Sam’s shirt and placed his hand in the center of the sigil, biting his lip against the pain as the magic pulled at his already tattered grace.

“I’ve got a location, let’s go.”

Dean flinched as Gabriel started to spread his wings. “Hell no. You can’t stand up, I’m not flying with you anywhere.”

“How precisely do you plan to…”

“Get in the car…bitch.”

Gabriel stared at him before laughing. “Fine.”

The archangel half-collapsed into the passenger seat as Dean started the car.

“Head south.” Gabriel instructed, holding Sam’s shirt in his hands and Dean nodded, pulling out his phone to call Bobby.

* * *

_They’re coming for you, Sam._

Sam opened his eyes, wiping the smear of blood from his lips. The world was stained red around him, and no matter how he blinked, the red haze never faded. His body straightened on its own and he watched his hand draw an angel banishing sigil on the wall nearest to him.

_Don’t worry, I’ll keep them away from you. You can take as much as you want._

The voice was familiar and his eyes widened. “Kali? Why are you doing this?”

Pain erupted through his body and he dropped to his knees, gritting his teeth.

_I don’t need a reason to destroy you._

Sam laughed weakly. “’Hell hath no fury’, huh? Jealous that after all that fuss, I’m the one who won Gabriel?”

He howled as the demon blood turned to acid in his veins and he was dragged to his feet once again, walking back over to the half-dead demon against his will and taking hold of the wound in her neck. Without a word, he drained the rest of the blood out of her. It pumped through him, setting his nerves on edge and he breathed a sigh of relief.

_He won’t want you after this. You’re hardly even human anymore._

Sam laughed, falling back against the wall. “He shouldn’t have wanted me in the first place.”

“Well, then, I’d still be miserable, wouldn’t I?”

Sam blinked in surprise at Gabriel’s voice and looked up to see his brother and Gabriel standing at the edge of the alley. “No…”

“Sam, what the hell is going on?” Dean’s gruff voice carried as he surged forward, quick to take Sam back in hand. Gabriel was leaning on the wall at the end of the alley and Sam felt Kali’s control swing in, full force.

“Gabriel…run!”

It was too late as his hand slammed down on the sigil and Gabriel’s eyes widened, screaming as he disappeared in a flash of blinding light. Dean backpedaled, staring at the bloodstains on Sam’s shirt, the smears on his face, and the dripping sigil.

“Did you just blast your boyfriend? What’s happening to you? I thought you were clean of this shit.”

Sam was shaking. “Dean, it’s not…it’s not me, I can’t…”

Dean started forward, nodding and reaching forward to help him when Sam swung forward, connecting with Dean’s jaw and knocking him back into the dumpster. Dean’s eyes widened as Sam slammed into him, grabbing him up by his jacket and slamming him down.

“Dean, run, I can’t stop…” Sam gasped out but Dean shook his head.

“Not leaving you.” Dean said roughly, his hands falling over where Sam was gripping his jacket.

He tried to block the next punch but Sam’s strength was magnified by the demon blood and he felt something in his arm crack. Then Sam was raining blows down on him and it was all he could do to draw his arms up and try to cover his head.

Suddenly, he was dropped and he slid to the asphalt, listening to the sound of Sam’s retreating footsteps as unfamiliar voices filled his ears.

“Did you see the guy? Did you get him?”

“Someone call an ambulance!”

“Christ, there’s a dead body over here!”

Dean pushed at them weakly, trying to look through the wall of legs to find his brother.

“SAM!”

Someone touched his jaw, bloody and broken, and he blacked out from the pain.

* * *

As soon as Dean filled him in on the situation, Bobby knew what he had to do and just who he had to call. He hated asking Crowley for anything, but if anyone could help right now…it was him. Bobby had been building up to it for the last hour and now he sat down at his desk, shotgun leaning against the wood and he poured himself a tumbler of whiskey and set out a bottle of Crowley’s favorite scotch.

“That for me?”

“You know it is.” Bobby gruffed, annoyed that Crowley had just appeared and yet grateful as he always was that he didn’t have to call. As Crowley sauntered over, hopping up on the one spot on the desk not covered by books or paper, he poured himself a glass of the scotch and smirked down at Bobby.

“You obviously want me to help reel in the moose.”

“Then you’re aware of the situation.”

“Gigantor goes AWOL and starts scarfing down my subordinates like Twinkies? Yes, I noticed.”

“Are you going to help?” Bobby groused, annoyed at Crowley’s off-hand manner.

“Are you going to say ‘please?’”

Bobby sighed. “Please, Crowley. This ain’t helping you none either.”

“It’d be easier just to kill him.” Crowley murmured before rolling his eyes at the glare Bobby gave him.

“Relax, I’m still bound by our agreement. I shan’t harm a hair on their chinny-chin-chins. What I can do is pull back my forces and put up a no-fly zone around Sam. If we can cut off the supply, he’ll dry out and then you and yours can fetch him.” Crowley shrugged, hopping down from the desk. “How’s that, love?”

“What is he doing here?”

Bobby was on his feet in an instant at Castiel’s sudden arrival. The angel and monarch glared at one another, Castiel with pure hatred while Crowley looked moderately amused.

“Why are you here?” Castiel demanded, advancing on the King of Hell.

“Where’d you get a baby?” Crowley asked, bemused.

Crowley moved enough so that Bobby could see Castiel was indeed carrying what looked like a six-month old infant in his arms. Even so, Castiel still advanced fiercely on Crowley.

“Get out.”

Crowley shrugged. “Guess that’s my cue.”

He vanished and Bobby came around the desk, looking from the baby to Castiel and back.

“And what did you do?”

“This is Simon Novak.”

“Jimmy’s son? Why isn’t he with Jimmy?”

“Jimmy’s dead. His soul has moved on to its permanent resting place in Heaven. I promised him I would look after his family.”

“Right.” Bobby sighed. First Sam and now this? “And what do you know about kids?”

“Admittedly, not much.” Castiel sighed, but they were both distracted by a happy giggle from Simon who was reaching for something just above Castiel’s shoulder. Bobby’s eyes widened slightly.

“Can he see your wings? Isn’t that dangerous?”

“He is an angelic vessel. He can perceive my true form without injury, and children are more open to the supernatural due to their innocence.” Castiel smiled fondly at the child and Bobby watched as the boy’s hand curled around something invisible, no doubt having finally grasped onto Castiel’s wing.

Bobby sighed and stepped forward. “Give him to me. Dean and Gabriel are going to need your help. Sam’s demon blood cravings are back and he’s out there picking off demon after demon. That’s why Crowley was here.”

Castiel willingly passed Simon into Bobby’s more experienced arms and flexed his wings. “If you hear from Sam, please call me.”

He suddenly frowned, his eyes widening. Bobby swallowed, stepping forward to place a hand on his shoulder.

“What is it?”

“Dean.”

The angel was gone a second later and his hand was extended out at nothing. Bobby looked down at Simon who looked back up at him with his father’s blue eyes.

“Welcome to the family, bucko.” Bobby sighed.

Simon gurgled and grabbed at his beard and Bobby couldn’t help but smile.

“So is angel boy gone?”

Bobby turned back to Crowley, rolling his eyes. “I’m surprised you came back.”

“There’s still business to attend to…who’s the cutie?”

Before Bobby could protest, Crowley has swept little Simon out of his arms and lifted him above his head. Simon laughed brightly and twisted in Crowley’s hands, outstretched arms reaching for something over Crowley’s head and Bobby frowned, curious but knowing better than to ask.

“Relax, love, kids love me.”

Bobby huffed, shifting his weight before taking Simon back, almost forcefully, and Simon’s laugh cut off mid-gurgle as he looked curiously between the two of them.

“I don’t think Dean and Cas would want you playing with their son.”

“Oh, so Dean grew a uterus to go with those ovaries?”

Bobby pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing wearily. “I’m too old for your shit. Can you help Sam or not?”

Crowley smiled. “It’s already done, my darling. Order’s given.”

* * *

Dean woke to the familiar repetitive beep of a cardiac monitor and the feel of morphine pumping through his veins. He forced open swollen lids and sighed at the empty room. Gabriel was blasted to Oz and in his state, who knew how long it would be before he could get back. Sam was… _inhaling_ demon blood, whatever it was doing to him, whatever had brought it back…did this mean someone was trying to break into the Cage again? Set Lucifer free? Dammit, why couldn’t they leave well enough alone?!

Groaning, Dean let his head fall back, pressing a hand to his forehead, trying to repress the constant throbbing. This did not look good.

“Dean!” The voice was filled with relief and Dean opened his eyes, unable to stop himself from grinning at the sight of Castiel. The angel rushed to his side, taking his hand and sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Damn, it’s good to see you as…you.”

Castiel smiled weakly as Dean ran a hand over his chest, appreciating the simple ability to do so again. He reached for Dean’s forehead but Dean caught his hand.

“No, look, I’m fine. Hospitalized and everything, but you’re going to need your grace to go against Sam. Someone’s controlling him, okay?”

“Dean, I’ve already looked in on Sam. I placed a ward around him so that he would not be harmed before I came to see you.”

Dean breathed a sigh of relief before reaching to pull Castiel down for a kiss. He rested his forehead against Castiel’s, smiling weakly.

“I love you, you know that?”

Castiel pressed a warm kiss to his lips. “I need to get back to him. We have to hurry and stop him and whoever is controlling him.”

Dean frowned at the tone of Castiel’s voice. “What’s wrong?”

“The amount of demon blood he is consuming…” Castiel sighed. “It’s more than he should be able to handle, even being a vessel. It is altering him…permanently, if we do not get to him soon.”

Dean choked, his fear showing plainly on his face. “Then why are you here? Go!”

“I had to check on you…” Castiel explained guiltily and Dean squeezed him tightly.

“I know, but go. Please.”

Castiel brushed their lips together before he pulled away, blinking out and Dean fought back sudden tears.

“You hang on, Sammy,” He murmured. “Cas is coming for you; don’t you give up on me.”

* * *

Sam was curled over the toilet in the motel bathroom, seizing as his stomach turned itself inside out. Blood coiled delicately through the water, spirals that might’ve been beautiful if not for the chunks of flesh littered in between. His body was tearing itself apart and he still couldn’t stop thinking about where the next demon was, where his next _hit_ was. Tears rolled down his face, tears of blood. There was nothing left in his body but demon blood.

Resting his head against the cool porcelain, Sam frowned when he felt the nearest demon flicker and vanish. Smoked out and gone home? That wasn’t so bad, there were plenty…plenty more…

No…every demon that he could feel was smoking out, retreating, running away. In minutes, he couldn’t feel any of them, not a single demon was left for miles. Where was the car? He had to follow, had to find one, it had been hours… _minutes……seconds_ …since the last demon he killed, the last drop of blood.

Sam forced himself to his feet, splashing water over his face before grabbing his jacket and heading out.

There had to be one demon left in this town. There had to be at least _one_.


	11. Never Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam suffers from hallucinations as withdrawal sets in.

From the second Sam’s hand hit the sigil, Gabriel fought the urge to scream as his body was torn apart and reassembled, crashing down and for a second, he blacked out.

The first thing he was aware of when he woke was that it was volcanic rock beneath his head. He could smell sulfur and ash and the faintest hint of pineapple. The breeze rolled over him, hot, and yet soothing at the same time, full of salt off the sea.

“Well, at least I’m not in Hell…” Gabriel groaned, pushing himself up weakly, unaware that he was not alone.

“No, you’re not.”

Gabriel groaned at the sound of Samael’s voice, flinching away from the hands that pulled him to his feet. Samael brushed soot from his shoulders soothingly despite the fact that her grip on his shoulder was too tight for comfort.

“Look what he has done to you.”

“No…” Gabriel snapped, jerking out of her grasp. “I saw him, someone’s got him under a blood spell.” He paused, gritting his teeth. “Not like you to work through someone.”

Samael smiled sweetly, patting his cheek. “Maybe that’s just all part of the game.”

A brush of wings and he was gone, leaving Gabriel standing alone on the island of Oahu. Gabriel lowered his head, frowning as he closed his eyes, trying to think of just who Samael would try to play against him. Someone who had extensive experience with blood magic…Gabriel’s eyes snapped open and he groaned, desperately wishing he could be wrong.

“Oh, Kali, tell me you wouldn’t fall for this trap…”

* * *

Crowley would never admit it out loud, but the mini-Castiel was adorable. It wasn’t really Castiel, he had to remind himself, just his meatsuit’s little rat. Still, the kid was fearless and no matter how many times he put him down, Simon just turned and crawled right back into his lap, using Crowley’s tie to pull himself to his feet.

“I just heard from Cas. Dean’s in the hospital and I need…” Bobby came down the stairs, pausing at the sight of the two sitting on the floor of the cellar. Crowley was sitting dead in the middle of their usual devil’s trap, leaning back on his hands as Simon flopped against his chest. Simon seemed perfectly comfortable around the King of Hell, and for a moment, Bobby let himself relax. Only for a moment though, and then it was all business once again.

“Relax, darling, I can handle being alone with the rugrat long enough for you to pick up your brat.” Crowley purred, looking down fondly at the angel babe.

Bobby rolled his eyes, sighing. “It’ll only take an hour, and then I’ll be back with Dean.” He paused, looking at the two of them once again. “You sure yer going to be okay?”

Crowley smiled up at him, a soft smile that spoke volumes towards just how much he tolerated Bobby’s paranoia. All this time that they’d been together, the better part of the past three years, and Bobby still didn’t trust him outside a devil’s trap. Well, he supposed he had that coming.

“I can handle the tyke. Go on, go fetch the nightmare. I’ll be right here when you get back.”

Bobby nodded, heading back upstairs. Crowley waited until he heard the old truck start before wrapping an arm around Simon. The baby was clinging to his shoulder, reaching up again and Crowley flinched when Simon managed to grab onto a tip.

“Hey, easy there love, that hurts.” Crowley complained, standing up. “Bobby, Bobby, Bobby…I swear…” He shifted Simon in his arms and the little one turned to look up at him with a toothless grin. “I swear, I love the man…or something like that…but really? Leaving you alone with me, in a devil’s trap, with no formula, no diapers, no toys, nothing…for an hour? Possibly longer? This may go down as stupidest thing he’s ever done, after selling his soul to me.”

Simon just stared up at him, gurgling happily, and Crowley smiled back at him. “We’ll just make a quick trip into town and pick up a few things, sound fun?”

A second later, the cellar was empty.

* * *

Sam kicked the door in, sensing where the demon was hiding under the guise of an everyday tax accountant. It’s eyes widened when it saw him, his meatsuit’s wife and son giving startled cries when their ‘father’ vaulted over the couch to run.

Sam caught the demon before he’d taken two steps and slashed his throat, latching his mouth onto the wound and draining him of every last sweet drop. The wife screamed when she saw them, her hands drawn over her mouth in horror, and he thought he saw her eyes flash black for a second. She turned to run and Sam was on his feet, lunging after her. He tackled her to the hardwood floor, pressing her down with the weight of his body as she fought against him.

“Payback, bitch,” he hissed as he jerked her pants down.

* * *

Sam snapped awake, the steady burn of withdrawal aching in his veins. Groaning, he rubbed his eyes and tried to remember when and where he’d passed out. There was no way of knowing if the images in his head were real or not, so he tried not to think about them too much.

He felt hands padding at his waist and pushed them away, offering some wordless threat against the scavenger as he struggled to stand.

“Oh look, he’s awake.”

The voice was terribly familiar and Sam opened his eyes, seeing Gabriel and Castiel standing above him, their expressions icy.

The sharp retort of a gun sounded in his ears and he gasped as his chest exploded with fire. He looked down at the wound incredulously, then back up to Castiel. For a moment, something like relief flooded him then his heart broke at the look in Castiel’s eyes. This was not the angel he called brother, this couldn’t be. Castiel loved him.

“Abomination.” Said the creature who looked like Castiel, aiming the gun at his forehead. Sam gave a wordless sound of protest before Not-Castiel squeezed the trigger.

* * *

Sam opened his eyes, the world blue and bright around him. It was serene here; there was no darkness, no screaming, no pain…only peace. The world swirled around him like water, the sky so very far away. Then he frowned, a sudden burn in his chest that had absolutely nothing to do with demon blood and he was choking.

He thrashed in the water, trying to get his bearings, swimming but completely unaware if he was swimming towards the surface or pulling himself further down. Light was everywhere, there was no point of reference. His lungs were burning, he was choking…he opened his mouth, sucking in sweet air but only water filled his lungs. He was dying, he was dead.

—

It never ended.

—

It. Never. Ended.

* * *

Castiel closed his wings, dropping into an alley less than a block from where he’d sensed Sam last. His wards were still in place, but the danger Sam was most in was coming from within himself. Castiel felt a certain sort of rage flare inside his chest, all the more prominent without Jimmy’s soul there to dampen it. He turned, heading up the sidewalk through crowds of people towards where he could sense Sam, the demon-human taint a dark aura in his angelic sight.

The tan overcoat flared out behind him as he stretched his wings, warning any demons in the area to stay away, when he sensed something that made his blood run cold.

Angels.

He took off running, pushing people out of the way as he flared his Grace, letting it morph and twist until it fell into his hand as his silver blade.

* * *

Sam lifted his head from the rough asphalt, coughing up blood, but the angels continued advancing on him. One set a foot on his back and he groaned before lashing out, the angels retreating back against the onslaught of psychic energy. It pushed him to his feet, fists clenching at his side.

“He is marked as a mate, Jehuviel. I am not sure this is right.” One said, looking at him with concern.

“He is Lucifer’s vessel; that is all.” Another replied and the other two nodded in agreement.

The fourth still looked at him with concern, and Sam wondered what Gabriel’s mark looked like on his soul. It amazed him it was even still there after all he’d done the past few days.

_Oh God, Gabriel, I’m so sorry…you deserve so much better than me._

They each drew a silver angel blade and started forward again.

“STOP!”

Sam’s heart surged at the familiar voice and the angels turned to where Castiel was advancing on them, wings flared aggressively. He stopped a few feet back.

“You will not touch Sam Winchester.”

Sam blinked at the change in Castiel’s voice, a hint of his true voice echoing around the words, and each angel flinched, contracting their wings in submission. Even Castiel looked surprised at the sudden change and looked up at Sam for a brief second before returning his gaze to the angels.

“Flee or die.” He commanded and in an instant, the angels were gone.

Castiel started forward towards him, but Sam’s hand rose automatically and Castiel flew backwards several feet at the unexpected attack, landing roughly on his back.

“I’m sorry, I can’t stop…” Sam whispered as Castiel got back to his feet shakily, wiping blood from his nose.

“It’s okay, Sam, I’m here.” Castiel said softly, stepping towards him again. Sam lashed out every time the angel tried to get close, but Castiel never hesitated to get back up and try again, their eyes locking with each attempt and Sam felt tears rolling down his face. His last attack barely made Castiel slow down and then he was falling forward into the angel’s arms.

In Castiel’s arms, he weighed nothing. Castiel didn’t even flinch with his weight, while Sam couldn’t even summon the strength to lift his arms. How did he come to have not one but two angels who cared for him so much? His brother, Castiel, and his mate, Gabriel…he didn’t deserve to be so loved. He was just the boy with the demon blood and that was all he would ever be.

“Please…please kill me, Cas,” Sam whispered and felt Castiel stiffen against him.

“Sam…”

“Please, there’s not a speck of human left in me. Just kill me, so I can’t hurt anyone else.”

Castiel slid a hand under his chin, forcing him to look up into the angel’s eyes. Castiel’s eyes were bright, full of love and pride rather than disgust.

“Do you think a demon would say such things, Sam? Maybe there’s a speck in you yet.”

Sam smiled weakly and Castiel raised a hand to his forehead. The angel’s grace flowing through him was the sweetest thing he’d ever felt in his life, like cool water in a desert. He felt Castiel spread his wings and then they were flying.

“It’s going to be okay, Sam,” Castiel said firmly and Sam closed his eyes, sliding his arms around Castiel’s shoulders.

Of course it was going to be okay. Castiel had him. He was safe.  

* * *

Kali was lounging on a red velvet chaise when Gabriel appeared across the room, a single broken feather fluttering to the carpet despite how he kept his wings hidden from her. She watched it fall and turn to dust on the floor as he trembled for a moment, his gaze falling on the crystal vial in her hands.

“Kali…why are you doing this? I thought we were good.”

“You left me…to go screw some insignificant worm. You took him as your mate! What is he going to live, 30…40 more years? We could’ve had eternity!”

Gabriel looked at her sadly, his eyes filled with unshed tears. “We would’ve been lying to ourselves. You know it, I know it.”

“Oh, but it would’ve been a good lie, Gabriel!” Kali whispered, getting to her feet and crossing over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “We were so good together. And when Aphrodite gave him Sam Winchester’s blood, I thought I could show you what you were chaining yourself to.”

Gabriel laughed, shaking his head. “That wasn’t Aphrodite, Kali, that was Samael…an angel like me. He’s trying to destroy me, because she thinks that’ll stop his world from ending.”

Kali stared at him in surprise. “…an angel?”

Gabriel shrugged as she pulled away from him. “You’ve been played, sweetheart.”

Shaking her head, Kali stepped back, tucking the vial against her chest. Gabriel followed her, reaching out a hand.

“Give me his blood, Kali. I won’t ask twice.”

She looked up at him, a single tear slipping down her cheek, and she made as if to hand him the vial before snatching it back.

“Tell me you love me.” She whispered desperately. “I’ll give him back to you, if you promise to stay with me.”

Gabriel’s eyes widened slightly before he nodded. “Okay, whatever you want, just let Sam go.”

Kali gasped, recoiling and looking away from him as tears fell down her cheeks. “You really do love him, don’t you?”

“More than I know how to say. And I know every language there is.”

Kali turned, smiling at him through her tears before she reached out, pressing the vial into his outstretched hand.

“I hope one day you can forgive me for this.”

Gabriel tilted the vial, such a small thing to have caused so much trouble, before slipping it into his pocket and stepping forward to kiss her cheek.

“Maybe someday.”

She smiled even as he vanished in a whirl of feathers, no doubt returning to his mate, then her eyes widened and she looked down at the silver point bursting through her chest.

“But I won’t.” A rough voice sounded in her ear and she turned to see the blue eyes of an avenging angel, the last thing she would ever see.

* * *

Dean drifted in and out of consciousness with the help of the morphine until a rough hand shook him awake and he looked up at the familiar scruffy hunter.

“Come on, Dean, let’s get you out of here.”

Dean nodded quickly as Bobby helped him sit up and took out his IV. He helped Dean slip on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt he’d brought with him.

“Dude, is that really necessary?” Dean groaned when Bobby rolled a wheelchair into the room.

“Stand up and walk three feet without falling, and then you tell me if it’s necessary or not.”

Dean pushed himself to his feet and immediately flopped back on the bed when the room spun. He shook his head before motioning Bobby over with the chair.

“Okay, I give. Have you heard from Cas?”

Bobby held the chair steady while he got comfortable, quickly wheeling him out towards the exit.

“Not since he called to tell me where you were. He went after Sam, that’s as much as I can tell. Can’t you pick him up on your new angel radar?”

Dean shook his head. “Morphine must me messing with it, each time I try to reach out for Cas, all I get is a long stream of math equations and a headache. I must be doing it wrong or something, it’s still pretty new.”

Bobby nodded slowly. “Well, just a warning, but you got a surprise for you when you get home.”

Dean turned halfway around in the chair to look up at Bobby. “What kind of surprise?”

“One that squirms and says ‘Dada.’”

Dean frowned, his brow furrowing as he tried to wrap his head around why there would be a baby at Bobby’s house and why it was a surprise for him. Bobby smirked down at him.

“From what Cas said, Jimmy’s in Heaven. I take that to mean the rest of the Novaks are too, because Cas brought the littlest one back with him. Says he promised to take care of Jimmy’s family.”

Dean turned back around, staring down at his hands. “Dammit, Cas…”

* * *

Gabriel sensed Castiel and the weight he was carrying and met him mid-flight; together they carried Sam down to Bobby’s, landing in the front yard at the same time Dean and Bobby pulled up to the house in the old truck.

“Sam!” Dean cried, stumbling from the truck and over to them. Castiel took Sam’s weight from Gabriel, the weakened archangel leading the procession into the house as Castiel cradled Sam’s unconscious body against his chest.

Inside, the wailing of a baby could be heard and Bobby quickly headed downstairs as Castiel laid Sam down on the couch, both Dean and Gabriel hovering nearby. Dean laid a steadying hand on Gabriel’s shoulder when the archangel looked faint and they shared a solemn look as Castiel laid his hands on either side of Sam’s face.

Dean looked up when Bobby returned, carrying the six-month old Simon in his arms, and his gaze lingered when the boy fixed him with a familiar blue stare, his heart clenching suddenly in his chest.

“It’s not good,” Castiel brought his thoughts back to the now when he spoke, and Gabriel closed his eyes against the sudden pain even though he’d been expecting those words.

“What do you mean, ‘not good’?” Dean demanded.

Castiel looked up at him solemnly. “He consumed far too much in far too short a time. The demon blood has rewritten his DNA, there’s no way he’d be able to survive without it, even if we were able to purify his system. He’s more demon than human now.”

Dean closed his eyes, running a hand over his face as he fought back tears. Gabriel trembled underneath his hand.

“I should’ve fought harder, should’ve gotten to him sooner…” he heard the archangel whisper.

Behind them, Simon began to cry loudly once more.

* * *

 


	12. Back to Roots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel searches for a way to help Sam.

Dean had stayed by Sam’s side until he couldn’t take it anymore. Castiel had made Gabriel pass out with a touch to the forehead and the archangel was now curled up on the floor next to Sam on the couch. Any attempts to move him someplace more comfortable had ended with a wingslap to the face that Dean was pretty sure would’ve killed him had he still been human.

Because he wasn’t human anymore, there was no real way around it. Castiel didn’t have to say anything, but Dean could take a hit from an archangel, he could hear Castiel’s thoughts in his head, and even channel Castiel’s grace if the moment called for it. Dean didn’t have time to deal with not being human, not with Sam held in an angel coma to keep the demon blood from spreading and killing him.

Castiel was in the library, reading, and had been reading for four hours straight. Dean stopped, leaning against the doorjamb, before crossing over to Castiel’s side and laying a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Dean,” Castiel said automatically. “I’m going to fix him.”

“You need rest.” Dean said softly, brushing his fingertips over Castiel’s cheek.

“I don’t care.”

Dean sighed, his chin hitting his chest as he dropped his head solemnly. “Cas…Cas, this isn’t your fault. Don’t make me lose you too.”

Castiel lifted his head, looking up at him with tears in his eyes. “I don’t know how to save him.”

The words hit Dean like a sack of bricks, and he dropped to his knees before Castiel. In a second, the angel had fallen into his arms, sobbing brokenly into his neck.

“I don’t know what to do, Dean. I don’t want to lose him. I can’t lose him.”

“We’ll find a way,” Dean gasped through his own tears. “There’s a way and we’ll find it, I promise.”

_Please don’t hate me._

_I don’t hate you. I’ll never hate you, so don’t worry your feathery ass about that._

Castiel laughed weakly, squeezing his shoulders tightly before pulling away. “Let me get back to researching.”

Dean nodded, pulling a chair over to sit next to him. A second later, Simon began making little huffing noises from his crib under the window. Castiel started to get to his feet, but Dean beat him to it, lifting the babe into his arms and hushing him with gentle words.

“We’re going to fix Sam, and then we’re talking about this, okay?”

Castiel nodded slowly, trying not to think about how small and fragile Simon seemed in Dean’s capable arms. If he couldn’t protect Sam, how could he protect Simon?

* * *

Bobby paced across the cellar, running a hand over his face as Crowley watched him quietly.

“There’s nothing?”

“Nothing I can think of, no,” Crowley reiterated.

“What about a deal?”

Crowley sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Look, darling, I would if I could, but I simply can’t.”

“Can’t or won’t?”

“Can’t!” Crowley snapped. “There are some things I just can’t do, deal or no, and fixing the moose after how he buggered himself is just beyond my power.”

Bobby sighed, meeting his gaze, and Crowley stared back before shaking his head, disbelieving.

“I haven’t touched a hair on the boys’ heads, nor Castiel’s, since we made our deal, and those brats are three of the four beings I most want to gnash between my teeth. I’ve been in and out and never once have I tried anything. I think I deserve some measure of trust now.”

“Yeah,” Bobby said softly. “I suppose you do.”

Crowley straightened, brushing off his suit. “Hell has its own library now. I’ll look around in my spare time, see if I can find anything that might help.”

“You do that.”

Bobby cursed the moment Crowley was gone. He wanted to trust the demon, he really did, and Crowley had given him every reason not to hesitate. There had been so many times when Crowley could’ve hurt him or the boys or…anything, but he hadn’t. Still, he was a _demon_ and years of deep-seated instinct just didn’t go away.

* * *

Gabriel woke to Castiel shoving things to the walls in the living room. “What did the furniture do to you?” he grumbled before Castiel picked _him_ up and set him to one side.

He looked up at Dean as the Winchester walked into the living room, staring at the mess Castiel was making as he cleared a spot in the center of the room. Gabriel met the stark blue gaze of the child in Dean’s arms and grinned automatically, earning a smile from Simon. Glancing up at Dean, who seemed more concerned with what Castiel was doing than the giggling babe, Gabriel started to reach for Simon.

“Do you want me to…?”

“I got him.” Dean cut Gabriel off, shifting ever so slightly away from the archangel.

Slyly, Gabriel wrapped a wing around Dean’s back and tickled the infant’s cheek. Dean turned his head and glared at him. “You know, I can see your wings now, right?”

“So you should let me hold him.” Gabriel teased as Simon struggled in Dean’s grasp, trying to get his hands around Gabriel’s wing.

“Get your own son.” Dean snapped, stepping into the living room. “What are you doing, Cas?”

Gabriel smirked at Dean before going to sit next to the unconscious Sam on the couch, entwining his hand with his mate’s. Castiel looked up, his gaze trailing from Dean to Gabriel and back.

“I might have a plan.”

“Might?” Bobby groused from the stairs. “You’re rearranging my living room, you better have a plan.”

Castiel sighed, turning. “There’s a spell I found, Umarekawari.”

“What?” Dean interjected.

“Umarekawari, it means ‘The Channeling of Rebirth.’ It’s used in some ancient cultures as a marriage ceremony, binding two souls together until they are reborn as one. I think that if I make some minor adjustments, and if we use something with Sam’s original DNA as the second catalyst, I might be able to force it to overwrite the damage the demon blood did to Sam.”

“That’s a lot of ‘ifs’ and ‘mights,’ lil bro…” Gabriel started skeptically and Castiel sighed, holding his hands out pleadingly.

“Gabriel…it’s the best I have right now and Sam…this stasis I’ve got him in won’t last much longer, and then he’ll be out hunting demon blood again. I told you, his human instincts are almost gone now, and if we don’t act fast, demon is all with which we’ll be left. We might not be able to bring him back a second time.”

“Do _you_ think it’ll work?” Dean asked quietly in the silence that followed, and Castiel turned to him solemnly. Dean met his gaze, searching his face for the truth. Castiel looked back at him with wide, hopeful eyes, blue glistening in the dim light.

“It is possible,” Castiel said softly, honestly, into the silence. “It is the best idea I have, and the more pure the DNA that I use as a base is, the stronger Sam’s chances will be.”

“How pure?” Dean interjected. “We’re not talking about, like, a strand of hair here, are we?”

Castiel shook his head, his gaze finding Dean’s again easily.

“Sam’s birthday is May 2, 1983, correct? Do you know the exact time?”

“7:23 pm.” Dean answered automatically before he realized what Castiel was planning to do. He swallowed hard before nodding to himself. “I’m going with you.”

Castiel’s eyes widened slightly, surprised. “Dean, I don’t think…”

_I’m going, Castiel, and that’s the end of it._

“But…Simon…someone needs…”

“Here,” Bobby walked over, holding out his arms and Dean hesitated for a second before letting Simon go to Bobby’s perfectly capable arms. He swallowed once as Bobby stepped back, fighting the urge to rush over and snatch him back.

“Bobby can watch Simon,” Dean said softly. Castiel looked up at him and Dean could hear his thoughts whirling in turmoil before he nodded, agreeing.

“What about Sam?” Gabriel stood quickly and Castiel turned to meeting, grasping Gabriel’s face lightly in his hands.

“I know you are not yet recovered, brother, but I am certain you can maintain his stasis without me. We won’t be gone long, I promise.”

Bobby walked over to his desk and jotted a number down, handing it to Dean. Dean looked down at it curiously.

“What’s this?”

“My phone number. Call me and tell me to invest in Microsoft.”

Dean laughed, shaking his head. “Well, then, you might not be Bobby. And I like my Bobby as he is.”

Castiel carried the book he’d been reading over to Bobby and handed it to him. “If you can draw this on the floor, that will be helpful.”

He handed him another stack of papers. “And these are the adjustments I’ve made. Please be as exact as possible.”

Bobby laid a hand on his shoulder. “I’d say ‘take care of Dean’ but you do that anyway.”

Castiel smiled softly before stepping back, threading his hand into Dean’s. Dean smiled down at him. “What? No fingers to the forehead?”

“No need,” Castiel replied.

The next second, they were standing on a street corner in Lawrence, Kansas, 1983. Dean tightened his grip on Castiel’s hand, remembering the last time they were here together and how quickly Castiel had left him. This time, Castiel stepped closer to him and kissed his cheek.

“I’m not going anywhere, Dean. Let’s find your mother.”

Dean nodded, turning his head to catch Castiel’s lips in a quick kiss. He heard a startled cry behind them. A mother with her two children was staring at them as if they’d just murdered an innocent old woman, and Dean rolled his eyes.

“Yay 1983…” he muttered before pulling Castiel down the street after him. They’d barely gone a block before a group of five or six kids barely old enough to drink, if that, started following them, filling what would’ve been a beautiful morning with taunts and catcalls that had Dean gripping Castiel’s hand hard enough to break it had he been human.

“Dean, maybe I should…”

“Nope,” Dean shook his head even as he felt Castiel gather his grace to transport them. “No, I’m going to walk down this street, holding your hand, and to hell with anyone who wants to say anything. Got it?”

Castiel blinked slowly before quickening his step to catch up with Dean. “Got it.”

Still, the angel pressed close to his side and Dean felt Castiel’s wings extend protectively around them. Castiel frowned briefly and Dean caught a glimpse of worry that wasn’t attached to their followers.

“What’s wrong?”

“My wings…” Castiel responded immediately. “They’re unusually heavy.”

Dean instantly slid an arm around the angel’s waist, tugging him close. “Are you okay?”

He felt Castiel shake his wings, fluffing them briefly before they settled into the same protective arch. Castiel shrugged after a moment.

“It’s not painful, simply disorienting. I am uncertain as to what has caused the shift.”

Dean nodded slowly, tightening his arm around Castiel’s waist. The angel wasn’t the only one who could be protective.

“Hey! Keep that fag stuff to yourself! There are children out here!”

Dean turned to face the five guys that had been following him, pulling Castiel behind him. They couldn’t see how Castiel’s wings flared or feel the tightening in his grip from the flow of anger. Normally, he’d be the first one to instigate a fight, but he knew that Castiel would be the one finishing it and these guys were only human.

“Look, kid, we’re just passing through. Not looking for any trouble.”

“Then let go of his hand.” The ringleader set himself up straight in front of Dean as the others circled around them.

“Dean…” Castiel said softly as Dean tightened his grip on the angel’s hand.

_Cas…when I say ‘run,’ we’re going to run…_

_As you wish._

“I’d rather not.” Dean said shortly and the ringleader smiled, shaking his head, all before Dean wiped the smile from his face. He swung forward with his free hand, hitting the leader straight in the chest, just below his sternum, knocking the wind out of him. As he fell back, Dean turned, pulling Castiel behind him.

_Run!_

* * *

Bobby had set the nursery up in the panic room as it was no doubt the safest place in the entire house. He’d long ago been amazed at all the little things his wife had bought and squirreled away in preparation to have children. Now they were being handed down to his son and their kid.

Bobby had just gotten Simon to sleep when a loud crash sounded above him. Cursing and glancing down, he was surprised that Simon was still fast asleep, so he tucked the blanket around the sleeping babe and half-ran upstairs to see what had happened.

The sigils on the floor were a smear and Bobby followed the line of ink to find Gabriel unconscious underneath the pile of furniture they’d hastily shoved to one side. It took him a minute to shove enough out of the way so he could pull Gabriel out, blood leaking from a gash on the side of the archangel’s head.

He’d just gotten Gabriel free when he heard laughter behind him and he turned, swallowing hard at the sight that greeted him.

Sam stood across the room, a bloody knife in one hand and grinning fit to burst as blood ran down his chin.

“…Sam?” Bobby gasped, laying Gabriel down carefully before advancing on his adopted son.

“Hey Bobby!” Sam greeted him enthusiastically, his eyes flickering black.

“…balls…” Bobby felt himself deflate, mentally noting where his shotgun was…just in case. “What’s wrong with you, boy?”

Sam smiled but Bobby saw how he trembled. “I’m hungry, Bobby, so very hungry. Gabe tried to stop me from leaving…are you going to try and stop me?”

Bobby swallowed even as he nodded. “I know you’re still in there. I know you’re not just demon blood. Dean and Cas…they got a way to fix you and they’re coming back real soon if you can just hang on…”

His words caught in his throat as Sam raised his hand, psychic energy throwing him bodily across the room to crash into the pile of furniture.

“Maybe I don’t want to be fixed!” Sam screamed. “Maybe I like it like this! You’re just going to have to kill me!”

Bobby shook his head as he crawled to his feet.  “I ain’t gonna kill you, boy. You should know better by now.”

Sam sighed and for a second, Bobby saw true sadness flash across his face before Sam straightened up, flicking the knife. “Fine then…”

“Easy there, moose.”

Bobby spun to see Crowley standing in the doorway to the kitchen, holding a glass of scotch in one hand and looking rather annoyed.

“Crowley, stay out of this.”

“Sorry, love, but I feel obliged to interfere.” Crowley smirked, setting his glass down. “Come on, big boy, prime demon blood, right here. King of Hell, actually, I bet I taste extra spicy.”

Bobby stared, unable to move as Sam surged across the room to pin Crowley against the wall, holding him a good six inches off the ground and pressing the knife against his throat.

“Let’s found out then, shall we?” Sam growled, a line of blood opening across Crowley’s throat, but Crowley rolled his eyes, reaching up to place a hand on Sam’s forehead.

_“Dorme nunc, o irate incerteque in mentem gige!”_ Crowley shouted, a flash of light bursting through the room, and when Bobby opened his eyes, Sam was unconscious on the floor and Crowley was brushing off his suit.

“What did you do?” Bobby yelped, running to Sam’s side.

“What, no thanks?” Crowley rolled his eyes before shrugging. “He’s asleep. No harm, no foul. You should’ve had him in a devil’s trap.”

“He’s Sam.”

“He’s a demon. Start treating him like one.” Crowley snapped, walking around him to gather the unconscious Gabriel up, surprisingly gentle.

Bobby ran a hand over his face, but Crowley was right. Sam was sleeping, just as he said, and Bobby gently took the knife from his hand and tossed it to the side. He hooked his arms beneath Sam’s arms as Crowley carefully set Gabriel down on the couch. Crowley rolled his eyes at Bobby trying to carry Sam downstairs and walked over, shooing the elder hunter away. He took up Bobby’s position, sliding his arms under Sam’s and hooking them around his chest so Sam’s head rested on his shoulder. Without hesitation, he hauled the Winchester down the steps with Bobby hurrying to grab Sam’s legs as Crowley seemed not to care if they hit each step on the way down.

Crowley carried Sam to the center of the cellar and dropped him into the waiting devil’s trap, careful not to get himself caught in it as well.

“Easy!” Bobby hissed when Sam hit the floor with a dull thud. He quickly tucked a folded blanket under sam’s head and glared at Crowley.

“He’s fine,” Crowley groused, obviously annoyed at the attention Bobby was giving the man who’d just tried to kill him. Bobby just sighed and shook his head.

“Not talking about Sam, idjit, though you could’ve been a bit gentler with him too. But you best be quiet or you’ll wake the baby.”

Crowley frowned and turned, leaning back so he could just see the edge of the crib where it sat inside the panic room.

“Kid must sleep like the dead not to wake up with the moose stomping around upstairs.”

Bobby frowned as he straightened up, walking to stand next to Crowley. “He didn’t even wake up when Gabriel fell and that nearly gave me a heart attack it was so loud.”

Crowley glanced over at him before crossing over to the panic room, pausing at the door as he could go no further.

“OY SIMON!” he shouted, his voice echoing through the small space and Bobby swore, hurrying over and shoving Crowley out of the way to reach Simon before the baby began to wail. To his surprise, however, Simon was still sleeping soundly. Bobby shared a look with Crowley before laying a gentle hand over Simon’s stomach. The babe’s breathing was strong and steady, and he mewled sleepily up at Bobby as he woke under the hunter’s gentle touch.

Crowley shouted again, enough to startle any child into crying, but Simon just gurgled and closed his eyes to go back to sleep, one hand folded around Bobby’s finger.

* * *

Dean ran, pulling Castiel along behind him. He knew he could run for miles and Castiel could run further, but he had to keep sidetracking around busy storefronts and crowds of people. It was no surprise that, somehow, he and Castiel got boxed into a back alley. The five guys that had been chasing them came in from three angles, two from either side and the leader from the front, holding his chest and keeping a good distance way. He’d learned his lesson the hard way.

Dean automatically put himself between the men and Castiel, more for their sake than Castiel’s. The angel could take them easily and Dean could already feel how tense his boyfriend was, ready to defend them as soon as it became necessary.

“Leave this to me, Cas,” Dean begged and felt Castiel twitch in frustration.

“Dean…”

Dean turned his head, half-glaring at Castiel. “Cas, trust…”

Castiel’s eyes went wide and Dean stumbled as Castiel pulled him out of the way of a swung pipe that one of the men had picked up. Dean watched in horror as Castiel plucked the pipe from the kid’s hands and leveled a bone-crunching strike into his jaw.

“Cas…Cas, no!” Dean shouted even as the angel danced among the boys, defending and striking. Two were already on the ground, the first one Castiel had struck was not moving. Already Dean could hear shouts from the main road, the fight immediately drawing attention.

“Cas!” he shouted again, catching one boy by the shoulders and pulling him back away from the angel.

_Have to get him away, have to get away, away, away somewhere safe…_

He swung, his fist connecting with the nearest face and then he was latching his arms around Castiel’s waist, the angel’s wings flared aggressively, and he felt that familiar burn of Castiel’s grace within him.

_Away, away, away somewhere safe…_

They were falling suddenly, flying, the air both icy cold and searing hot around them, and he could feel Castiel’s surprise and sudden fear.

_Somewhere safe…safe…_

They crashed into the floor with a loud thud, Castiel’s wings spread out to soften their landing and so they filled nearly every corner of the small room, knocking toy trains and books off shelves and pillows off the bed. Dean was sprawled out over Castiel’s chest and slowly pushed himself onto his hands and knees, wincing. Castiel sat up gingerly, drawing his wings up and rubbing the back of his head, his legs splayed to either side of Dean’s hips.

“What the hell!?”

Dean’s head snapped up, narrowly missing Castiel’s chin, and he stared at the very pregnant blonde in the doorway, framed by a little four-year-old boy at her hip.

They were in his old bedroom.

His gaze met his mother’s, her eyes wide and yet full of righteous fury, a mother protecting her young. His younger self, however, fearlessly stepped forward to meet Castiel’s gaze.

“Are you my angel?” he demanded into the heavy silence.

* * *

 


	13. Claimed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel go back in time to the day of Sam's birth.

_Angels are watching over you._

It was spring, early May actually, a time of renewal and rebirth, when all life broke out of its shell and took on the new dawn. This spring, there was a woman in a small town in Kansas and she was in love. Of course, there were many women in small towns in Kansas who were in love, but this one was very special. To the outside eye, she might seem like nothing unusual, but she would give birth to two of the most incredible boys, the world’s very own superheroes.

The youngest, the one she carried now, was quiet and solemn, wanting nothing more than a life beyond what he would grow up to have. For his sacrifice, he would grow up to defeat the Devil at his own game and save the world. His name was Sam Winchester.

The eldest, Dean Winchester, would save the world in his own way, saving people, hunting things, but the truth was that his talents were wasted as a warrior. True, he was good at it. He never hesitated to pull the trigger, but it wasn’t what he was meant to be. No, his destiny lay in the fact that even though he never prayed and didn’t believe in God, he would one day cross paths with a bruised and battered angel, broken nearly beyond repair. It was his destiny to save that angel, remind him of what he was and what he was meant to be, reforge him in unconditional love and devotion.

That made him just about the most important person in the universe.

* * *

Castiel drew his wings up tighter but it was too late to hide them. Besides, the child could probably see them even if he hid them. In his disorientation and shock at what Dean had just done, it took him a few minutes to realize just where they were and who the child was that was advancing towards him, one hand outstretched towards his wings.

“Dean…” he breathed softly.

“Dean!” Mary snapped, holding a hand out to her young son. The four year old paused, looking from Castiel back to his mother, before stepping back and taking her hand.

“It’s okay, Mom. He’s an angel, like you said, right?”

Dean watched the emotions play on his mother’s face, caught in her own lie. Angels had been watching over him, but she never really believed in them. Now here she was, faced with Castiel, the living, breathing embodiment of the promise she’d put her son to bed with for years. Then Mary’s gaze traveled from Castiel to him and he felt his breath catch as her eyes widened then narrowed in confusion. For a second he though recognition flashed through them, then he remembered that Michael had wiped her memories oh so long ago.

“I know this is crazy,” he started softly and she raised a hand, stopping him mid-sentence.

“Dean, I want you to go downstairs and make yourself a sandwich, can you do that for me, baby?”

The child nodded and immediately turned, heading down the steps and out of sight. Mary swallowed hard as soon as he was gone, and Dean knew from the way her hands clenched repeatedly that she was wishing for the weight of a weapon in her hands. He couldn’t help but try to memorize the way the sunlight glinted in her hair, the blue dress straining around her pregnant stomach, his brother growing and living within her.

“What are you?” She started again, this time keeping her eyes firmly on Castiel.

“My name is Castiel,” Dean heard his angel answer strongly. “I am an Angel of…”

Castiel froze and frowned and Dean reached back automatically, taking Castiel’s hand in his before he thought about it. He turned back to see Mary look at their joined hands then back up to Castiel’s face, unperturbed, and let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“I am an Angel.” Castiel repeated.

“An angel?” Mary said softly, shaking her head. “Until right now, I would’ve sworn that they didn’t exist. After all the things I’ve seen, all the people I love who have died…if you’re an angel, where the Hell is God?”

“I don’t know.” Castiel responded without hesitation, catching even Dean off guard. “I’m not here on God’s work, and frankly, I find myself caring less and less for him at time goes on. I am here because in the future, in the time from which we come, your son, Sam, is in danger.”

Dean watched as Mary recoiled in surprise, her hands immediately going to spread protectively over her stomach.

“I didn’t…I haven’t told anyone his name yet…” she breathed and Dean stepped forward.

“Like he said, we’re from the future. We’re, um…really close to Sam and Dean.”

Dean could feel Castiel’s eyes boring into the side of his face at his almost lie and Mary picked up on the tension almost immediately.

“How close? What happened to Sam?”

_Dean._

“Do you want to tell her the truth?” Dean snapped, turning to his boyfriend.

“This is why I didn’t want you to come.” Castiel sighed and Dean swallowed, inwardly flinching at the chastisement.

“Oh, you’re not going to tell me the truth?” Mary stepped closer to them and Castiel tucked his wings back away from her automatically. “You already told me you’re from the future, you say that you’re here to save my son, but I don’t know either…”

“You do, actually,” Dean said softly. “We’ve been here before, about four years ago. We were trying to save you and John from a rogue angel who wanted to kill you, but Michael, the archangel, wiped your memories.”

“You didn’t actually meet me,” Castiel said softly. “I was indisposed.”

“Who are you?”She asked, this time looking at Dean, and he sighed softly.

“You just send me downstairs to make myself a sandwich.”

Mary’s eyes widened, looking towards the stairs then back towards him. She stepped forward and placed her hands on either side of his face, looking up into his eyes, and Dean laid his hands over hers.

“Dean? But how?” she whispered.

“I told you, we’re from the future. Angels got their hands on some DeLoreans.”

“I still don’t understand that reference,” Castiel complained beside him and Mary glanced his way before looking back at Dean, studying his face.

“You’re…with an angel? Why are you with an angel?”

“You mean ‘with’ like in the same room or ‘with’ like he’s the last being I’m ever going to kiss? Yes to both.” Dean tried to shrug nonchalantly.

Suddenly, Mary’s expression went from disbelief and worry to laughing, her lips split in a wide smile.

“You mean, my boy bagged himself an angel?” She laughed, lightly hitting his shoulder. “How’d you pull that off? Must be the Campbell in you because you certainly didn’t get that charm from a Winchester!”

Dean laughed as he fended off her playful punches, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes at her unconditional acceptance. The next second, she had wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him down, hugging him tightly.

“You weren’t supposed to grow up to be hunters. I left all that behind.”

Dean gave her a gentle squeeze. “You know, I used to hate it. I blamed Dad, I blamed everyone. But the honest truth, Mom? If we hadn’t become hunters, I never would’ve met Cas. I don’t want to even begin to imagine what my life would be without Cas. Everything that led to me meeting him, everything I went through…it was worth it.”

She smiled up at him and he stepped back, reaching for Castiel’s hand and Castiel came willingly, shifting so Dean could wrap an arm around his waist. Mary smiled at them both.

“Okay then,” She said firmly. “What’s wrong with Sam?”

Mary brought them back to the heart of the matter and Dean struggled with just how to explain what had happened to Sam. How did he tell her that Sam had gone off and gorged himself on demon blood and attacked both Gabriel and Castiel and put his own brother in the hospital? That the only thing keeping him from doing so again was the love an archangel had for him? He opened his mouth and shut it again numerous times before Castiel came to his rescue.

“Sam fell under a curse, a spell that eventually mutated his blood as a structural level.” Castiel explained succinctly. “I have found a way to revert him to his original form, but I need a pure sample of his original DNA as a base.”

“Doesn’t get more original than the day he was born,” Dean tried to make light of the situation, but one look at Mary told him she knew how much they were holding back. He sighed, he could he tell her that the babe she carried now would one day be addicted to demon blood and it was all because of the deal she made nine and a half years ago?

Mary laid her hands on her stomach once more, turning away from them, and Castiel pressed reassuringly into Dean’s side. Dean slipped his arm from Castiel’s waist to his shoulders, readily accepting the comfort Castiel offered.

“So Sam’s going to be born today?” She laughed lightly. “Bad timing, baby, Daddy’s pulling a double down at the shop. He won’t be able to get away.”

“We will stay with you.” Castiel promised and Dean nodded as well.

Mary smiled, running a hand over her stomach fondly. “So, how long do we have?”

“Approximately six hours.” Castiel said firmly and Mary grinned, turning to offer the angel a hand. Castiel glanced to Dean before nervously placing his hand in hers.

“Come on…Cas, was it?” She waited for Castiel’s nod before continuing. “If you’re going to be dating my boy, there’s something very important I need to teach you.”

* * *

Gabriel hadn’t stirred for hours and Bobby ran a hand over his face, unsure of what to do. Crowley was idly wandering through the house, bouncing Simon in his arms. At first Bobby had been wary, but Simon gurgled happily in the King of Hell’s embrace. Somewhere, Crowley had gotten a little devil’s suit and Simon was gumming happily on his floppy red wings.

A yell from the cellar announced that Sam was awake and Bobby pinched the bridge of his nose, frustrated. He wasn’t going to go through this again. He’d seen too many of his family taken from him by demons. So he took up the brush again and set about fixing the sigils that Castiel had asked him to make.

When Bobby was thoroughly distracted, Crowley allowed himself to pause. For a second, standing in the kitchen arch, looking into the room where Gabriel lay and Bobby wrote out Sam’s salvation on the floor, Crowley let himself think about everything that had led him to this sudden moment. He’d gotten attached, let himself feel like he belonged where he didn’t, but the truth was that he belonged nowhere. That had been the biggest lie Gabriel had ever told him, the lie that he belonged somewhere.

Every instinct told him to run like Hell was after him. He could still feel the archangel’s fire coursing through him. There was nothing to say it might not happen again.

Nothing to stand in its way because he was alone and that’s how he liked it.

Bobby grunted as he got back to his feet and Crowley smirked, once again the King of Hell.

“Easy there, love, you’re no spring chicken.”

“I wasn’t the one who was collecting souls at the start of the Civil War.”

“Wars are great for soul-harvesting. Kids will pucker up for just about anything if they think they’ll die tomorrow.”

* * *

“Gently now, dear. Lightly press around the edges, like you’re handling a soap bubble.”

Dean sat next to his younger self at the table, the latter happily eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Castiel and Mary were a few feet away, both covered in flour up to their elbows as Mary showed Castiel how to put the finishing touches on her own signature apple pie.

“Now this is the most important ingredient you have to add before you bake it, okay?” Mary lightly tapped Castiel’s nose, leaving a fingerprint of flour there. He looked at her curiously.

“I am certain we added all the necessary ingredients.”

She laughed, dusting the flour off his nose with her apron. “Love, silly. We haven’t added love yet. So blow the pie a kiss, then set it in the oven.”

Castiel regarded her curiously before delicately blowing the pie a kiss and setting it carefully in the oven to bake. She then tugged him back to the sink, washing the flour off his arms. Before she could finish drying his hands, all the bowls and flour and the mess they had made had vanished and Dean laughed.

“Angel mojo,” he explained at her stupefied look and she laughed, taking the seat at the table opposite him so young Dean was situated between them. Castiel quickly took the seat next to him, folding their hands together beneath the table. Dean suppressed a shiver when he felt Castiel’s wing extend around him, but it instantly caught his younger self’s attention.

It took a second for the idea to form in the four-year-old’s mind, but it happened too fast for Dean to stop it. One moment young Dean was sitting quietly, the next he had dropped his sandwich and stretched out both hands to latch onto Castiel’s wing.

“My angel.” He declared to the suddenly silent kitchen.

Dean felt an electric tremor pass through Castiel’s wings as Castiel himself went rigid next to him. Mary immediately began apologizing, taking her son’s hands and tugging them away from Castiel’s wing. Dean turned in his seat, cupping Castiel’s jaw in his hand to turn the angel’s face towards him.

“Cas, you okay?”

He blinked in surprise when Castiel began laughing. “Cas?”

Castiel shook his head, his wings trembling and Dean noticed they weren’t as sunken as they had been all day.

“I always wondered,” Castiel started. “Why my wings recognized you when we met. Before I touched you, before I even saw you, I knew you were there and I knew you were my mate. I never thought, I never realized…it was my first time seeing you, but not your first time seeing me. _You had already claimed me._ ”

Castiel hid his face behind his hands, laughing uncontrollably in a terribly human gesture and young Dean clapped his hands, grinning. Dean just shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

“You know what? I think Sam’s been letting you watch too much Doctor Who.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “You’re a Whovian, you just won’t admit it.”

“Am not.”

“I can read your thoughts, Dean.”

He suddenly turned to look at Mary, mid-conversation, and his tone was oddly ominous.

“It’s going to start now.”

Mary let out a gasp, flinching as she doubled over, and Dean was instantly at her side as Castiel lifted young Dean out of her arms, settling the child on his hip. She laughed when the contraction passed, taking both Dean and Castiel’s hands, one in each of her own, and using them to pull herself to her feet.

“Here we go, boys.”

* * *

 


	14. Rewritten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean reflects on his life with Castiel as Mary prepares to give birth.

It was two months in to whatever the hell this was supposed to be with Castiel, and Dean couldn’t help but feel absolutely fucking terrified. It was just him and Sam at the moment, driving down the road, and all he could think about was how much Castiel had given up for him. It wasn’t even that long ago when Castiel had been dying, ready to give up altogether, and the only thing that had been holding him back was Dean himself.

Dean didn’t know how to handle that. There was someone out there other than Sam who really cared enough about him to go on living solely for his sake? Castiel was just as new to this whole relationship thing as he was, but Castiel had never been with anyone else. Not like him, who gave the word ‘whore’ a whole new definition. Hell, he’d turned tricks for a while back when Sam was in Stanford and John was off on a hunt. It was quick and easy cash and he liked sex so what did it matter?

Stuck in the middle of his strangled debated with himself was the glaring fact that Castiel was an angel. Sure, he’d fallen once but come back with a new source of grace to pull on. Then he became that God-Cas thing, mutated angel, Godstiel, whatever…but now he was just an angel again. What right did Dean have to something that pure? Castiel didn’t love him, Castiel didn’t know what love was and…

_That’s what it comes down to, isn’t it, Dean? One of the first things Cas said to you, “You don’t think you deserve to be saved.” Truth is, you don’t think you deserve anything do you? Especially not to be loved, not by something so pure, so innocent…_

“Dean…”

Castiel’s voice purred in his ear and Dean swallowed, his grip tightening on the wheel as Sam snored lightly. Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s chest, his head resting against the shoulder of the car seat.

“Yeah, Cas?”

“Shut up.”

Dean’s laughter woke Sam up and the younger Winchester cursed at them both, punching Dean’s shoulder and beating at Castiel with his jacket.

They didn’t have the conversation at once, and in ways, they didn’t have it at all. Words often didn’t need to be exchanged between them, but Dean remembered every moment as if it were engraved into carbon steel.

Three months in, and Dean stopped Castiel outside the motel room, making Sam carry their stuff in. “Look, I’m no good at relationships, and I’m so fucked up, there aren’t even words…”

Castiel had stopped him with a kiss. “I know, Dean. I still love you.”

Dean wanted to scream and rail at him. _What do you know, Cas? You weren’t in Hell! You didn’t see me!_

But he had. Castiel was the one who had unlocked the chains around his soul and carried him out.

Four months in, Dean noticed Castiel had a way of touching him in ways that he normally didn’t notice, but they were always in moments where Castiel needed a subtle way to claim him. They be sitting a bar, a waitress flirting with him, or interviewing a pretty witness, and Castiel would just touch his shoulder, his arm, let their fingertips brush when Castiel would hand him a picture or a file…they were often less ways for Castiel to notify the intended that Dean was his, and more soft reminders that Dean had him to come home to.

It scared Dean just how much he liked the idea of coming home to Castiel.

After five months, Dean was stopped at a diner to pick up some dinner while Sam and Castiel went to the local library to grab a book Sam said he ‘needed.’ The waitress was nice and fairly pretty with brunette curls and green eyes. She flirted and when her hand lingered on his, his breath caught in his throat. Not for the usual reasons either, but he didn't want Castiel swooping in like a jealous Batman on steroids.

“Sorry, babe, you’re gorgeous but I’m seeing someone.”

“You’re seeing me.” She tried again, smiling seductively and Dean mentally took a step back.

Yeah, she was gorgeous, but her eyes were green, not blue, and they certainly didn’t have galaxies in them. Her hair was neat and curled, not wild and messy. Her body didn’t thrum with an otherworldly power, her hands couldn’t smite demons, and she didn’t have wings that could turn his entire body into a whimpering pool. She didn’t have grace that made every single touch between them feel like coming home.

Dean shook his head, laughing as he took the bag from her. “You couldn’t hold a candle to him if you tried.”

He didn’t look back, despite how much he wanted to see the pissed off look on her face. It was worth it to see the half-hidden appreciation in Castiel's eyes, the way his kisses turned soft and possessive all at once, knowing that Dean was all his own.

It was six and a half months past the first time Dean and Castiel had kissed, and he and Sam were eating breakfast alone in a diner somewhere in Missouri. They’d both finished eating and Dean was leaning back in his seat while Sam scoured the paper. Both of Dean’s arms rested on the back of the seat, and there was a soft flutter of wings and Castiel was sitting next to him. They were so used to him appearing by now that Castiel just launched into what he had found, a ghost two towns over that preyed on nine year-old boys, and Dean had leaned forward to look at the newspaper articles Castiel held, automatically sliding an arm around Castiel’s waist. He didn’t notice he’d done it until Castiel shifted to close the space between them without missing a beat in his explanation.

He stiffened even though he didn’t want to move away. Sam didn’t notice, but Castiel placed a reassuring hand on his knee which shouldn’t have made it worse, but it did. They were in Missouri, full of Southern Bible-thumpers, someone was bound to notice, and there went his peaceful morning breakfast.

“You want some coffee there, sugar?” The waitress greeted Castiel warmly.

“No, thank you,” Castiel replied easily. “But I believe Dean would like a refill.”

He took Dean’s mug full of cold coffee and she took it from him with a smile. “Be right back.”

Dean let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and Castiel gave his knee a gentle squeeze.

“Fuck, you’re still reading my thoughts?”

“Language, kid,” said the old-timer at the bar and Dean shrank back. Castiel was smiling, his way of laughing at Dean.

“You’re still reading my thoughts?” Dean offered again, hushed, and Castiel rolled his shoulders in a kind of angel-shrug.

“I have tried to stop, but…”

“It’s cool,” Dean cut him off. “It doesn’t bother me anymore.”

Castiel sighed in relief, and Dean wondered when it _had_ stopped bothering him. Yet, somehow, he liked having someone who could sort his brain out, even when he couldn’t.

At eight months, Dean woke up in the middle of a nightmare, cold sweat tingling at the back of his neck, and automatically turned into the warmth of Castiel. He hid his face in Castiel’s neck and knew he wouldn’t be judged even as the tears ran down his cheeks and dripped onto Castiel’s bare shoulder. Castiel just pulled him close, ever awake, and Dean realized that, like the Impala, he didn’t need four walls and a fridge to be at home.

Their one year anniversary actually came two days before Bobby’s cookout and Dean woke Castiel with a soft kiss.

“Congrats, you’ve put up with me for a whole year,” He teased lightly.

Castiel stirred slowly beneath him. “And vice versa. Has it really been only a year?”

Dean raised an eyebrow and Castiel opened his eyes full of galaxies, his hair wild and messy, his body thrumming with an otherworldly power. Hands that could smite demons wrapped around his waist and wings folded around him, pulling him close, and Dean smiled as Castiel’s grace wrapped around him, safe and warm. Home.

“I’m sorry, Dean, I don’t perceive time in the same way…”

Dean laughed, brushing their lips together. “So how long has it been for you?”

“One hundred and twenty years, three weeks, four days, nine hours, and twenty seven minutes.”

Dean blinked in surprise, shaking his head minutely before shifting onto his knees and pulling Castiel towards him so the angel’s legs wrapped around his waist. “So one year for me, 120 for you, I think that adds up to awesome, savage anniversary sex.”

**_Now…_ **

Now he glanced back at Castiel briefly before focusing on clearing a path through the people crowding the door. Castiel pushed his mother’s wheelchair as she bit her lip, squeezing the arm of the chair through her next contraction. When the nurse took them back through the double doors, Dean reached to offer Mary his hand to squeeze but Castiel shook his head.

“You push her,” Castiel said softly, nudging him into place and offering Mary his own hand.

Dean was silently grateful. Mary could hit Castiel with a brick and he wouldn’t flinch; he’d been certain he would’ve lost a finger before the night was over.

Castiel was ever attentive, sending Dean for water before Mary even asked. He kept a cool wet cloth nearby as sweat beaded on her forehead, the contractions coming faster.

“Did you call John?” She asked randomly, an hour into the labor.

Dean nodded, remembering how his heart has constricted at hearing the panic in his father’s voice, the determined “Tell her I will be there if I have to walk out,” and feeling the new pride in his father that he’d thought he’d lost.

“Dean,” she whispered and both of her sons went to her side immediately. She kissed the younger of the two, brushing his hair back sweetly before looking up to the elder.

“Dean, take him to the waiting room for me and stay with him, ok?”

He slowly nodded, taking her hand and squeezing it. “Love you, Mom.”

“I love you too, baby.” She said softly, pulling him down so she could kiss his cheek.

Dean reached down and offered his hand to his younger self, flinching slightly when the four year old slid a hand into his without hesitation. Dean let out a slow breath  and grinned at Castiel as the angel shook his head, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

“What were you expecting?”

“I don’t know,” Dean laughed. “Universe-ending paradoxical explosions?”

Castiel’s smile was a patient one and Dean shrugged, heading out of the room and into the waiting area with young Dean in tow. He took a seat and was surprised when his young self climbed fearlessly into his lap.

“My angel looks at you like Momma looks at Daddy.” He said firmly. “Is he your angel?”

“He’s our angel.” Dean answered, throwing caution to the wind, then laughed at the pout on the young boy’s face.

“I don’t want to share.”

“Well, I promise that when you grow up, you can have him all to yourself.”

“Promise?”

Dean grinned and offered the kid a handshake. “Shake on it.”

Young Dean shook his hand firmly, tilting his head curiously up at him. “You’re ‘Dean,’ like me.”

“Yeah, I’m ‘Dean’ too.”

The boy in his lap nodded as if this explained everything and began picking at the leather band on Dean’s wrist.

“Look, little man,” Dean started at the boy looked up at him attentively. Dean drew a short breath and then sighed; he wanted to tell him everything, but how much of it would the kid remember? What would it change? Would it really change anything at all?

Dean sighed and looked down at himself. “Look, you hug your mom every day, no matter what. Remember your Dad loves you and that he’s trying, even if it doesn’t seem like it. Love Sammy, even if he breaks the world, and not all angels are douchebags. Cas…Cas is pretty awesome.”

“Our angel.”

“Yeah, but only trust Cas. The rest of them are dicks.”

The child laughed and met him in a high five.

* * *

Castiel laid a cool cloth over Mary’s forehead and she tightened her grip on his hand as another contraction pushed through her. He glanced up at the clock which showed five minutes before six p.m.

“How much longer?”

Castiel lay a hand on her swollen stomach, checking on the unborn Sam, and felt her tremble slightly.

“What was that?” She murmured. “That tingle…”

“My grace,” he said softly. “I was checking Sam’s health. All is well.”

She nodded and squeezed his hand, murmuring weakly. “I don’t like not being able to see your wings.”

“It would raise too many questions if I were to display them here.”

She laughed lightly. “I know. I just can’t believe that after all these years of telling Dean he has an angel watching over him, he actually does have his very own angel.”

Castiel smiled warmly, but it quickly turned to worry as a strong contraction gripped Mary and a couple minutes later, a nurse came in, gently nudging Castiel to the opposite side of the bed.

“Just about time to start pushing, Mrs. Winchester,”

Mary looked up to Castiel who nodded and she let out a slow breath, nodding to the nurse.

* * *

Dean was in the middle of showing his younger self just how to take your phone apart and turn it into a makeshift EMF detector when he heard a familiar voice and looked up to see his Dad arguing with a nurse. He quickly got to his feet, shifting little Dean to his hip, and headed over.

“Da…John, Mary’s this way.” Dean said shortly before turning to the nurse. “He’s with me.”

She tossed up her hand and John looked at him gratefully. “I’m sorry, I don’t…”

“I’m Mary’s cousin. My partner and I stopped by on our way through town. Cas is in the room with her, this way.”

“Daddy!” Young Dean cried gleefully and John smiled, reaching up to brush his son’s cheek lightly. Dean felt his heart stammer in his chest and John kissed his son’s forehead.

“Be good, kiddo.” John breathed before he disappeared into the delivery room.

Dean felt himself smiling stupidly until he remembered that ‘kiddo’ was what Gabriel called Sam and he shivered. “Thank you for ruining my life, Gabe.”

The young Dean in his arms laughed lightly, wrapping his little arms around Dean’s neck. Dean shook his head, still grinning, before glancing up at the clock.

“Not long now, little man.”

* * *

Sam screamed up at the ceiling, pacing within the devil’s trap. Crowley could pretty much handle being viewed like a cheap piece of meat if it kept the fledgling demon from trying out some of his new psychic powers on Bobby and the tyke.

“What’s happening?” Bobby asked from the stairs, his voice barely above a whisper as Crowley sought to keep Sam’s attention.

“The demon blood is consuming him.” Crowley said softly. “Attacking the parts of him that are still human, tearing them down, rewriting them...honestly, love, if there’s any part of him that’s still human…”

“Don’t…” Bobby said sharply. “Don’t even go there.”

Crowley snorted derisively but froze as someone appeared on the stairs behind Bobby. He quickly turned away from the stairs, masking a sudden apprehension behind a snarl as Sam began to growl with the loss of eye contact. Crowley turned back towards him, raising his hand.

“ _Desine ut autem sonitus et somno, excelsa silvarum alces..”_

Sam howled under the bright light and fell to his knees, bound once again, though he didn’t sleep this time and Crowley didn’t dare try anything stronger.

“I don’t believe we’ve met.” Gabriel said softly behind him.

Crowley turned and faced him for the first time in millennia. “No, we haven’t. You can call me Crowley. Cheers.”

Gabriel nodded and Crowley noted how his wings shivered weakly, constantly. He’d seen Gabriel like this only once before, and Gabriel hadn’t even been bound then. His emotions fought themselves for room on his face, but he managed to keep them all back. These concealments only worked if you showed no attachment. Lucky for him, Gabriel’s attention didn’t stay on him long.

“Gabriel?” Sam was looking up at them through watery eyes and Gabriel was instantly kneeling in front of him, just outside of the devil’s trap.

“Sam,” Gabriel murmured weakly.

“Well, look at that.” Crowley shrugged. “There’s still some human left in him. Too bad, I could’ve used him.”

He was gone in an instant, and Bobby headed back upstairs to check on Simon.

Gabriel cupped Sam’s face in his hands, kissing him softly, and trembled as he felt Sam’s tears flow over his hands.

“God…Gabriel…”

“Shh, it’s okay,” Gabriel said softly and felt Sam shake his head.

“I can feel it inside me, Gabriel. It hurts, it hurts so much, God, it’s _eating me…_ ”

Hot tears slid down Gabriel’s cheeks, carving through the flesh until it felt more like blood dripping onto his chest. He kissed Sam’s forehead softly.

“It’s going to be okay, kiddo,” he breathed. “It’s going to be okay because I love you and I’m not going to let anything happen to you. You’re going to stay right here with me.”

* * *

Dean beat a steady rhythm into the floor while he waited for something, anything, to happen. Little Dean was asleep on his chest and tense as he was, he still jumped when Castiel touched his shoulder, greeting him with a smile.

“Come meet your brother.”

Dean passed the child to Castiel when Castiel held his arms out, and Mary smiled up at him when they both came in. John was grinning fit to burst and quickly got to his feet to reclaim Dean from Castiel. The boy woke in his father’s arms and John held him so he could see the tiny bundle in Mary’s arms.

“Look, Dean, it’s your brother, Sam.”

Dean’s breath caught in his throat and Castiel slid an arm around his waist soothingly. He breathed again when Castiel’s head rested on his shoulder and Mary beamed at them.

“Hey Sammy,” young Dean said softly and Dean couldn’t hold back a single tear which he quickly wiped away lest his father see.

Mary’s gaze met Castiel’s and she looked up at John. “Sweetie, can you get the nurse for me? I need to ask her a question.”

“Sure,” he said softly, kissing her cheek before slipping past Dean and Castiel.

Castiel flicked his wrist and the door slid shut. He stepped over to the nurse’s station and Dean walked over to Mary, looking down at the tiny red face encased in thick white blankets. A tiny blue hat was nestled on his head and Dean laughed lightly as Sam wrapped his still tiny hand around one of Dean’s fingers.

“He’s going to be huge, you know that?” he said softly and Mary smiled, even though he couldn’t see it. “Taller than me and I bet he’s got thirty pounds of muscle on me too. Solid as a rock, but he is such a girl. Always reading books and watching stupid documentaries on TV. He nagged himself an angel, too, and an _archangel_ at that _._ ”

Mary laughed and Dean turned as he felt Castiel at his back. Castiel had found one of the little vials that nurses used to take blood with, and Mary pulled Sam’s back just a little bit. Sam wrapped a hand around Castiel’s finger when Castiel gently reached down and pulled his arm around. He simply touched the vial to Sam’s skin and then it was full of his blood. Mary smiled weakly up at the angel as he fixed Sam’s blanket.

“That was easy.” She laughed and Dean grinned, taking her hand and squeezing it.

“We should be going.” Castiel said softly and Dean was suddenly fighting a new lump in his throat. Mary smiled through her tears as she squeezed his hand and then Castiel’s, tugging at them both until they lowered so she could wrap her arm around them both.

“My boys,” she said softly, fiercely, kissing first Dean’s cheek, and then Castiel’s. “My boys.”

Dean swallowed hard as they straightened up. He took a deep breath and forced himself to relax when Castiel slid a hand into his, squeezing tightly. He blinked, and they were in Bobby’s kitchen. He didn’t have to check the newspaper to know they were back in their own time.

“I can’t keep doing this,” he breathed, wiping the tears from his eyes. “Seeing her, and saying nothing. She’s not going to get to see Sam grow up, see him throw a ball, or steal his first kiss, or fall in love…”

Castiel’s lips were firm against his, stemming the flow of anguish and Dean clutched at him, sliding his hands up Castiel’s back and through his hair, savoring the lingering smell of his mother’s perfume on Castiel’s cheek.

“It’ll be okay, Dean,” Castiel said softly and Dean didn’t have a chance to ask him just _how_ he planned to make things okay, his mother was dead and she had to stay dead because that’s what dead things did, because Castiel was pulling out of his arms and into the living room where Bobby had the Umarekawari sigil written into the floor.

Sam wasn’t on the couch and Castiel turned to where Bobby was cradling a sleeping Simon.

“Where’s Sam?”

Bobby sighed softly. “He woke up, so we had to move him downstairs.”

Castiel half-flew down the stairs and Dean had to run to keep up with him, running into Castiel’s back when he suddenly stopped. Luckily, the angel didn’t even budge and Dean caught himself on Castiel’s shoulders.

Gabriel was pressed against the far wall, sitting on the floor with his knees tucked to his chest, only his eyes visible over his hands, fixated on Sam.

“Oh no,” Castiel breathed as they watched Sam pace inside the circle, his eyes solid black.

Dean reached for Castiel as the angel surged forward and without hesitation, touched two fingers to Sam’s forehead. Sam snarled at him for a long moment before collapsing into Castiel’s waiting arms.

“Gabriel!” Castiel snapped and the archangel started, stretching to his feet. “Upstairs!”

Dean watched as Gabriel’s wings dipped submissively and then he was sliding an arm under the archangel’s arm to help him up the stairs after Gabriel missed a step and nearly fell. Castiel followed behind them, carrying Sam over his shoulders.

The moment they were upstairs, Castiel was barking orders, and his voice was so commanding even Dean couldn’t resist.

“Bobby, I need you here in the circle. Dean, stand here. No…over three inches, stand. Stay still.”

“Cas…”

“Still.”

Castiel laid Sam in the center of the sigil and waved his hand, removing Sam’s clothes. Dean rolled his eyes, looking pointedly away.

“Does he have to…”

“Yes.”

Dean huffed as Castiel came over to help Gabriel into position so the four of them stood equally apart around the circle. Dean glanced down and recognized the Japanese symbol for ‘fire’ at his feet. Glancing around, he noted Bobby’s symbol was ‘earth’ and Gabriel’s was ‘air.’

Castiel took the vial of blood from his pocket and drew a symbol Dean didn’t recognize on Sam’s chest, and with the last of the blood, he drew a smaller version on Sam’s forehead. He then stepped back, centering himself in the circle marked ‘water.’

“Relax, you will feel the energy moving through you.” Castiel explained. “Above all else, remember, you must approve.”

“Cas…” Dean breathed. “This is going to work, right?”

Castiel didn’t answer him, he simply began to chant.


	15. I'd Rather Have You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel leads the ritual they hope will save Sam's life.
> 
> [NC-17]

This could possibly be his favorite day yet.

Dean was nursing his third beer while Sam was still on his first, and Castiel wasn’t drinking at all. They’d spread out a blanket to sit on, and the remains of their BLT sandwiches rested in the bag they were using as a trash can. Dean had been humming Metallica, but had finally stopped, and as the sun began to set, the only music was the constant chirp of crickets in the grass.

They sat in a triangle, back to back, and when Sam leaned back, both Dean and Castiel were there to catch him. Dean automatically leaned back as well and it only took a nudge for Castiel to get the idea. Dean fished for Castiel’s hand, still awkward and shy even after nearly seven months together, but Castiel found him first and threaded their fingers together.

It didn’t bother him, being their perpetual third wheel, but even as he thought it, Sam knew he was lying to himself. There were days he felt like he was losing his brother, even though he was crazy happy for them both.

Nothing floored him more than the feel of Castiel’s hand reaching over, tugging the empty beer bottle from his hand, and then threading their fingers together. Sam blinked in surprise, looking over at the angel, but Castiel wasn’t looking at him. Instead, Castiel was looking up at the sky, but his hand squeezed Sam’s briefly, reassuring. Sam suddenly found himself blinking back tears and he leaned his head onto Castiel’s shoulder.

That’s when he knew he hadn’t lost a brother. He’d gained one.

* * *

For what felt like centuries, Sam had been trapped in this endless world of dusk and ruin. The shadows ebbed and flowed like seas, and more and more of his world disappeared within the dark shadows until he was running alone in forest he barely recognized.

The sky was dark with swirls of blue and red through the endless black, and Sam fought through the brush, smacking into trees and bushes as there was not a speck of light as far as he could see. He felt the changes around him rather than heard or saw them, and he could feel it coming for him in the dark. The endless gaping maw that would swallow him whole if it caught up to him, and he ran into the unknown over and over again, desperate to hide, to survive.

_Kono niku o totte, sore ga zentai tsukuru_

Castiel’s voice echoed through the darkness and Sam latched onto it with everything he had, his soul crying out silently in relief.

_Brother._

The desperate gnawing thing was close behind, and Sam suddenly thought back to one night staying up late and watching Stephen King’s _The Langoliers_ while Dean slept on the couch. Those rushing things of teeth and hunger, born for nothing more than to eat the world of yesterday…that was what he imagined was chasing him.

_Korera no rei o shutoku shi, sorera ga zentai no tsukuru_

Castiel was chanting, that much he could tell, and now a beam of light broke through the darkness. It seemed like it was miles ahead of him, but it was all he could see in the emptiness and he ran towards it, calling out for Castiel the entire time.

_Kizutsuke rarete iru mono o iyasu_

It was a race against time, a race against the Langoliers, but this time there was no half-crazy business man to slow them down. There was only Sam himself and how fast he could run.

_Unmei no dezain o henkō_

He ran into the light and the chewing sounds behind him were even closer, roaring in his ears, but he could feel Castiel’s grace as if the angel was standing right beside him. “Cas! Cas, I’m here!”

_Ushinawa reta mono o hozon_

Castiel’s voice no longer echoed around him, but instead pulsed through him. Sam lifted his head, surrendering into the sounds around him.

_Korera no tamashī o tori_

Warmth flooded through him where there had been decades of cold and ice. He breathed and for the first time, he breathed fresh air.

_Sorera wa zentai tsukuru_

* * *

Dean closed his eyes as the energy pulsed through his body, just as Castiel said it would. The markings on the floor lit up with ethereal power as Castiel chanted in Japanese. Dean could only tell that Castiel had started the chant a second time when Bobby began to pick it up with him and soon Gabriel had joined as well. Then Castiel started repeating the same line, over and over again, and Bobby and Gabriel chanted with him. It took him a moment, but he figured it out and began to chant as well.

“ _Sorera wa zentai tsukuru…”_ He chanted, feeling foolish, but the light grew in brilliance and soon he was closing his eyes not out of concentration, but out of need.

 _“Sorera wa zentai tsukuru…”_ He couldn’t hear them anymore, but the words were thrumming against him, feeding off of him.

_“Sorera wa zentai tsukuru…”_

Suddenly, the light was gone, and silence fell heavy into the room. Dean blinked in the darkness, mentally hurrying his eyes as they adjusted, and then he heard a broken gasp from the center of the circle.

When he could see again, he saw his brother, gasping and coughing as he leaned back against Castiel’s chest, the angel’s arms firm around his shoulders. Sam opened his eyes and sought out his brother’s hopeful gaze, and the moment their eyes met, Dean knew he had his brother back. He and Gabriel reached Sam at the same time, and each took one of his hands. Bobby knelt by Castiel to lay a hand on Sam’s shoulder.

“You’re all right, kid.”

Gabriel laughed weakly and Castiel placed a soft kiss in Sam’s hair.

“I’m sorry…” Sam breathed. “I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t you even start with that bullshit.” Dean snapped. “None of this was your fault.”

Sam looked at him, disbelief clear in his eyes, but Castiel rhythmically smoothed Sam’s hair back and soon Sam’s eyes were sliding shut, exhaustion written on his face. Castiel gathered him up and carried him to the bedroom where Gabriel quickly lay down beside him, curling a wing around him protectively.

Castiel returned to Dean’s side and, for the first time in days, he let his fatigue show by wrapping his arms around Dean’s shoulders and simply sinking into his embrace. They stayed there for a long time, Castiel flicking his wings to return Bobby’s living room to its normal state, and Bobby left them to give Simon his dinner.

Dean traced circles into Castiel’s back as the angel’s breath warmed his neck. He lost track of how long it was before Castiel moved back, but when he did, the angel’s eyes were red with tears. Dean hadn’t even been aware he’d been crying.

“Father, give me strength,” Castiel breathed and Dean raised an eyebrow. It had been years since he’d heard the angel pray. Castiel’s grip on his shoulders was almost desperate, and Dean tightened his grip on Castiel’s waist so the angel fell forward onto his chest.

“Cas, what’s wrong? Talk to me.”

“Jimmy has passed on to his place in Heaven…” Castiel almost whimpered. “And now there is no barrier between his human emotions and my grace. I thought I knew, I thought I understood…Oh, Dean, there’s so much. So much good, and so much bad, joy, pain, anguish, hope, desperation…”

Castiel’s breath was coming faster and Dean could feel his grace pulsing in time with his human body’s racing heartbeat and he quickly pulled Castiel flush against him.

“Hey, hey now, breathe…” _Cas, Cas…feel me, feel my heartbeat, listen…steady now, breathe…_

Unsure of what he was doing, Dean still did his best, trying to push calm thoughts at Castiel through their bond and slowly the angel stopped shaking. Dean pulled back, watching Castiel carefully as he smoothed the angel’s hair back. Despite his calm exterior, Castiel’s grip on his shoulders didn’t lessen and Dean walked them over to the couch. The moment they were seated, Castiel crawled into his lap and anchored himself there.

“So…” Dean started slowly. “Jimmy’s gone then?”

Castiel slowly nodded against his neck.

“I thought you said he’d never die, and Gabriel and Scott…they’ve been together for thousands of years. How…”

“Jimmy did not want to lose himself. He was afraid of the time when he would inevitably forget Amelia and Claire, and who he was before we were joined. Between the two of us, we determined that if I were not with him when his natural time of death came, he would pass on. With this mark…” Castiel leaned back to show Dean a small brand on his wrist. “I would be able to retain his body for use as my vessel after his soul had moved on.”

“So he’s in Heaven…” Dean finished softly and new tears welled up in Castiel’s eyes.

“I miss him greatly, Dean.” Castiel whispered. “It is one of the reasons that I could not leave Simon behind. Truth it is, that I promised Jimmy I would take care of him, but I also want him for myself. He is the last piece of Jimmy in this world, and I want it.”

“Cas, you can’t keep him for that reason.” Dean said softly, gently pulling Castiel back from his neck once more and laying his hands on either side of Castiel’s face to hold his attention. “Kids…Simon…he’s not a replacement for Jimmy. He’s not going to be your friend. There are days he’s going to yell at you. There are days he’s going to hate you. He’ll break your heart, over and over again, and if we do our job right, then one day he’s going to walk out of our lives and there’s no way of knowing if he’ll come back. That’s what you’re setting yourself up for if you want him to be our son.”

Castiel smiled softly, lifting his hands to rest over Dean’s. “But there will also be days that he whispers softly, curled up between us as you introduce him to Star Wars, days that he tells us he loves us. You can teach him how to drive, and I can teach him about the stars. If we do our job right, he’ll be our son, and no matter how far he goes, that will still be true.”

Dean sighed, dropping his hands to Castiel’s waist and settling back against the couch.

“Trek,”

Castiel frowned, looking at him curiously.

“Star Trek, not Star Wars.”

“They’re not the same?”

Dean laughed, shaking. “No, Cas, they’re not the same. Not even closer, so don’t even go there.”

Castiel huffed and Dean sighed, looking up at him seriously once more.

“How can we possible be dads, Cas? I’m a hunter, you’re an angel. All the people, all the things that regularly try and kill us, and you want to bring a kid into that? Wouldn’t he be better off in a normal family with normal people?”

“Simon is an angelic vessel.” Castiel said calmly. “Nothing about his life will ever be, by human standards, _normal._ Why not have him in a family where everyone is as he is?”

“What if he hates us for getting his parents killed?”

“We will be patient and understanding.”

Dean ran a hand over his face and looked up into Castiel’s loving eyes, the angel’s hands now resting softly on his chest.

“What if I suck?” he breathed after a long pause, and Castiel’s gaze only softened further. Then, a strange glint appeared in the angel’s eyes.

“Well, you are rather good at sucking, so I don’t believe that I will mind.”

Dean drew a sharp intake of breath, suddenly grinning fit to burst as he twisted them so he could pin Castiel to the couch, running his fingers over the angel’s sides. Castiel squirmed and laughed beneath him, trying to twist out of his grasp until Dean finally gave in, settling on his chest. Castiel ran his hands lightly through Dean’s hair as Dean slid a hand under his shirt sleeve to the now white scar on Castiel’s shoulder.

“Seriously, what if I’m bad at being a dad?”

Castiel opened his mouth to respond, but Bobby beat him to it, stepping back into the living room with a bottle and a hungry Simon.

“Only one way to find out, idjit,” Bobby groused, waiting until Dean sat up and Castiel slid from his lap to hand him the hungry babe and the bottle. Simon was eager to assist his new father, reaching out for the bottle and coaxing Dean’s hands into his preferred position. However, Dean didn’t relax until Simon was happily eating and then a shameless grin broke across his face, mimicked by Simon around his bottle. Castiel laid his head on Dean’s shoulder, watching their son.

“I might as well go ahead and tell you now,” Bobby added after a minute and Dean looked up at his solemn tone.

“What’s wrong, Bobby?”

Bobby looked from Dean to Castiel and back again, shrugging weakly. “Earlier, when Sam woke up, I had just laid Simon down for a nap. Sam made quite the ruckus, but Simon didn’t wake up. Then, I, um…I did some testing of my own and…”

“Spit it out, Bobby.” Dean snapped, his arm curling protectively around Simon.

“I’m pretty sure the kid’s deaf.”

Dean swallowed and looked down at the innocent child in his arms. He shared a look with Castiel before the angel laid a hand over Simon’s head. Dean felt Castiel’s grace tingle through the babe for an instant before Castiel nodded in agreement with Bobby. He spoke even as Dean opened his mouth to protest.

“It’s not something I can fix, Dean. It is beyond me to divert the natural order.”

Dean nodded slowly, almost to himself. “It’s okay, it’s fine. We can handle this.”

“You got bigger things to worry about, anyway.”

Frowning, Dean looked up at Bobby. “What now?”

“You ain’t raising a kid on the road, Dean. I know you better than that, and you two idjits ain’t moving in here with me. So find yer own damn roof to kip under.”

Dean stared up at Bobby blankly, as stunned as if Bobby had just struck him or grown a second head or announced he was marrying Crowley, and Castiel laughed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

_Breathe, love. Just breathe, we can handle this together._

_He just told us to go house shopping. HOUSE SHOPPING!_

_We can’t raise Simon in the Impala._

_She’s a good home._

_She is._

_…_

_Yes, love?_

Dean turned his head to look at Castiel. After a moment, he closed his eyes and thought back. He could still feel Castiel’s eyes on him, but he was back in the barn the night he first saw Castiel, back in the roadside gas station where he first heard him, the warehouse where they shared their first kiss. He wondered how long he’d been coming home to Castiel, and when he was going to admit that he was so over the hunter lifestyle. All he wanted was a real home to share with his family.

And it was okay to want that.

“I guess four walls and a picket fence would be okay.” Dean said softly, and Castiel leaned forward to brush their lips together. Dean let the kiss linger for a moment before pulling away.

“So, you can feel everything more now that Jimmy has vacated the vessel?”

Castiel nodded slowly, his brow furrowing in confusion as Dean grinned ferally.

“Is that emotional stuff only, or physical too?”

* * *

When Sam finally woke up, he felt like he’d been asleep for days. It was still dark outside, though he could tell from years of experience that dawn wasn’t too far off. He was still naked from whatever ritual Castiel had done to purify the demon blood from his system. Looking down at his own chest, he noticed that wasn’t the only thing Castiel had purified. His anti-possession tattoo was gone, as well as several scars on his arms and torso. He shifted beneath the warmth of the blankets, trying to get a better view of himself, and felt something far warmer brush over his arms. Propping himself up on his elbows, he smiled at the sight of Gabriel stretched out beside him. His relief was short-lived, however, as the sight of how disheveled and broken Gabriel’s wings were.

Sitting up, Sam shifted onto his knees, straddling Gabriel’s thighs, and ran his hand over the knoll of his mate’s wings. Gabriel purred beneath him and Sam smiled, going about the careful business of smoothing Gabriel’s feathers. Castiel made it look much easier than it actually was, and Gabriel’s feathers were strangely sharp. By his fourth cut finger, Sam just set his jaw and focused on his work. He didn’t even realize Gabriel was awake until his fingers closed on empty air and he was staring into the stern gaze of his archangel mate.

“What are you doing?”

“Your wings…I thought I could groom them for you.” Sam said softly and Gabriel sat up, taking each of Sam’s hands in his own and sighing at the mess of cuts and near gashes across Sam’s hands. He looked up at Sam sadly before tugging him into the bathroom.

Sam followed him meekly, surprised when Gabriel started running hot water into the sink and pulled Bobby’s first aid kit out, hopping up onto the counter and tugging Sam back into the space between his legs. Sam was strangely comforted by the feel of Gabriel’s heels against the back of his thighs. At least Gabriel wasn’t chasing him off.

“Do you really thing I’m going to?” Gabriel said softly, running a cloth under the now steaming water and squeezing out the excess before sponging the blood from Sam’s hands.

Sam’s silence was answer enough and Gabriel sighed wearily. Sam swallowed, watching Gabriel work rather than meet his woeful gaze. Gabriel laughed bitterly to break the silence.

“I’m old, Sam. Believe it or not, I learned very quickly how to function without my grace shortly after I was bound.”

Sam raised his head to look at Gabriel’s back in the mirror. The brand was hidden now under Gabriel’s t-shirt, but he’d seen it one morning when he woke before Gabriel. The dark look in Gabriel’s eyes when he mentioned it and how fast Gabriel had moved to hide it had kept him from asking about it.

“It’s a binding spell,” Gabriel answered his unsaid question. “Michael’s last gift to me before we stopped talking, before I changed my name and my face and went deep underground.”

“Michael did that?” Sam asked softly and Gabriel nodded, drying his hands carefully and sponging rubbing alcohol over them.

“Used to give me hope, that when push came to shove, he couldn’t bring himself to kill me. I used to think that maybe, just maybe, he’d realize what he was doing was wrong, and one day he’d call me and tell me to come home. Then I realized…why would he stop? _There was no one left in his way._ ”

“What are you talking about, Gabe? What happened?”

Gabe jumped as if startled at the sound of Sam’s voice and shook his head immediately.

“Not yet, I’m not ready yet. I promised I’d tell Dean, don’t make me tell it twice.”

Sam nodded instantly, turning his newly bandaged hands to thread his fingers with Gabriel’s. Gabriel looked up at him solemnly.

“Now tell me why you think I would leave you.”

Sam swallowed hard, fighting the sudden ache in his chest.

“God, Gabriel…look at what I became, what I did…what I could’ve done. After that, how could I be anything to you, let alone your mate?”

Gabriel smiled slowly and tugged Sam down for a kiss. “Do you remember what I was doing when we first met?”

“I try not to think about it.”

“Well, think about it, kiddo. I was _murdering_ people I thought deserved it… _because I could._ I killed your brother, if you don’t remember, to prove a point.”

Sam clenched his jaw against the memory, but found it didn’t carry the same sting anymore. Gabriel had more than made up for it, time and time again.

“See?” Gabriel smiled, running his fingers through Sam’s hair. “This wasn’t even your fault. You didn’t consciously choose to run off and turn yourself into a demon. You were being controlled. So think nothing of it. Cas doesn’t care, Dean doesn’t care, Bobby doesn’t care, and I certainly don’t care.”

Sam knew he was grinning stupidly, but the relief he felt was so vast, he didn’t know how else to express it. Gabriel smiled and patted his shoulder, pushing him back so he could hop down.

“Come on, Samsquatch.” He purred, pulling Sam back into the bedroom and pushing him down onto the bed. Sam raised an eyebrow as Gabriel surveyed him, obviously trying to think about what he wanted to do before he nodded to himself.

“Stay,” He commanded before slipping out of the room. Sam huffed and turned to lie back on the bed, a hand sliding down to curl at the base of his growing erection. It had been too long since they’d been able to do _anything_. First Castiel and Dean had imploded one another, and then the demon blood, and Sam could already feel his heartbeat rising.

Gabriel popped back in and shut the door. “Of course my grace has to crap out on me now. Lucky Dean has such a wide selection.”

Sam raised an eyebrow as Gabriel set the bottle of lube on the bed level with his hip before straddling his thighs. He instantly sat up, wrapping his arms around Gabriel, and reaching up for his wings. Gabriel tensed and Sam froze as Gabriel pushed his hands back down.

“Are you forgetting what just happened to your hands? No grace, remember? My wings are going to be like glass to you right now.”

Sam blushed sheepishly, looking down. “Sorry, force of habit.”

Gabriel smiled and kissed him, pressing him back onto the bed. Sam frowned slightly, letting his hands fall to Gabriel’s hips, tracing circles through the thin fabric of the angel’s shorts.

“Gabriel, what…”

“Shush,” Gabriel grinned and leaned forward to kiss him, a soft thing uncharacteristic for the demanding archangel. Sam mewled softly as Gabriel’s hands smoothed over his chest, carding briefly through the slight curls of chest hair, tracing the firm contours of his abdomen, and finally coming to rest over his hipbones.

“I love you, Sam, and I want to give you this. I’ve never done this without my grace, so bear with me, okay?”

Sam nodded, already breathing heavy at the archangel’s proximity. Even without his grace, Sam’s soul was tuned to Gabriel, and every touch had him trembling.

Gabriel struggled for a moment, slipping out of his shirt, cursing his lack of practice. Sam fought the urge to laugh and simply soothed his mate’s frustration with soft kisses, swirling his hands up over Gabriel’s chest and tickling down over his slight belly. Gabriel pouted at him but Sam just rolled his hips pointedly. Gabriel continued to pout however.

“You talk about me wanting you, how the hell did someone as normal and average as me end up with someone as bloody gorgeous as you?”

Sam laughed, taking Gabriel’s hands in his own. “I think you’re confusing yourself with Scott again. But even so, do you really think I care what you look like?”

“So you’re saying I’m not beautiful?”

Sam rolled his eyes and sat up. “No, you’re not. There aren’t words for you, Gabriel. Your eyes gleam like pure gold, and your wings…your wings are fucking gorgeous.”

Gabriel raised his eyebrow at the odd obscenity flowing easily from Sam’s mouth.

“I’m strong because I have to be,” Sam continued. “Because as a hunter, a single pound of muscle can make the difference between surviving and being vampire chow. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, human or angel, and I mean that.”

Gabriel caught their lips together to hide the sudden overflow of emotion, but Sam felt it none the same. He wrapped his arms tightly around Gabriel’s waist, carefully avoiding his wings, and Gabriel quickly took control of the kiss, chasing Sam’s tongue back into his own mouth, and reclaiming the space as his own. He covered every inch of Sam’s mouth just in case any phantom taste of demon blood lingered, and then he was pressing Sam back down to the bed for a third time.

Sam laughed, leaning back, but his laughter soon caught in his throat as Gabriel began circling his hips, grinding down over Sam’s erection. Sam hissed and bit his lip as his bare cock slid over the slick fabric of Gabriel’s boxers, and he was soon whining with need.

“Okay, you’re going to have to help me out here, babe,” Gabriel said softly after a minute.

Gabriel straightened up on his knees, pushing down his boxers and maneuvering himself awkwardly until he could kick them off. He shifted forward so he hovered over Sam’s stomach, and grabbed the bottle of lube. Sam’s eyebrows allied with his hairline when Gabriel pressed it into his hand.

“Can you stretch me?”

“You’re going to…”

“I’m going to ride you like Seabiscuit, baby.” Gabriel grinned then laughed out as Sam eagerly popped the bottle open, pouring a generous amount of the clear liquid into his palm. He spread it over both hands, rubbing them together to make sure they were warm.

Gabriel gasped when Sam’s hands first went to his cock, sliding teasingly over him from base to shaft then down to curl around his balls, and it took all of his focus not to thrust up into Sam’s tight fist.

“Fuck, babe…” he gasped, his hands curling into fists on Sam’s chest.

Sam smirked as he stroked Gabriel, one hand sneaking away to travel downwards until he could circle one finger around Gabriel’s puckered hole. Gabriel whined, pushing back against him and whining softly when Sam breached with that single finger.

“So hot…” Sam whispered. Gabriel was tight and veritably molten around his finger, and Sam found himself wondering how the hell he was going to fit.

“I’m still an archangel, Sam,” Gabriel grunted. “You’ll fit.”

Sam smiled, pulling out to add a second finger and Gabriel immediately ground down onto his fingers, riding him by the time he added a third. Sam stilled his hips with a touch and pulsed his fingers slowly in and out, testing angles and searching. Gabriel jerked, his hands tightening painfully over Sam’s shoulders when Sam nudged his prostate.

“Oh fuck…” Gabriel gasped and Sam smirked, crooking his fingers to drag his fingers slowly over the bundle of nerves, pleased as Gabriel stuttered and clenched around him.

“Okay, that’s enough.” Gabriel snapped, grabbing his wrist and pulling his fingers out. He grabbed the bottle from where Sam had dropped it and poured some into his hand. Sam groaned and fought to keep his hips still as Gabriel worked his hands over Sam’s cock, slicking him up quickly before he shifted onto his knees. Sam slid his hands under Gabriel’s thighs, helping to support him as Gabriel lined himself up and sank carefully down.

“Oh…oh….” Sam bit his lip as his slick cock easily breached Gabriel’s stretched hole and Gabriel himself gave a low whine, taking all of Sam in with one slow push. He paused, trembling slightly, when their hips met once more and he sat up, laughing lightly.

“Damn,” he purred. “I haven’t done this in…at least a couple thousand years, and certainly not with someone so well-endowed. I thought you were big in my throat, but wow, Sammy…”

“Shut up and move.” Sam growled, and Gabriel yelped when Sam simply lifted him by his hips and slammed him back down, his hips curling up to meet him.

“Oh, fuck, babe…do that again…” Gabriel gasped, and Sam quickly complied, digging his heels into the mattress for leverage as he thrust up into Gabriel’s tight wet heat.

For the first time in his long, immeasurable life, Gabriel surrendered completely to another being. He lost himself in the grip Sam kept on his hips, his own hands clenched over Sam’s shoulders, his toes curling in the sheets. His orgasm was not a spontaneous moment, but a low rolling thing that curled up from the place deep within him where Sam had marked his grace and claimed him. It burst over him in waves that left him gasping and shuddering against Sam’s chest, his mate using his greater size to curl around him.

“I love you,” Gabriel whispered fiercely into Sam’s shoulder and Sam gave him a gentle squeeze, murmuring something that might’ve been “I love you too.”

Gabriel didn’t sleep another moment, barely even blinking until Sam woke up several hours later. Try as he may to brush it off, Samael’s threat still rang in his ears. His wings already recognized the superior angel, submitting without hesitation.

“Enjoy this moment, my love,” he whispered softly, pressing a kiss to Sam’s forehead. “It won’t last long.”

* * *

Dean had gotten quite good with the welder over the years, and the piece of metal he was working on now had special significance to him. He’d cut it from the one of the many hoods he’d had to replace on the Impala, but he could tell from the long gouges on this one that it was from nearly two years ago when demons had attacked a dying Castiel and Jimmy had saved him.

So it seemed right to use it.

He’d chased Castiel out of the garage at least half a dozen times. He wanted it to be a surprise for his mate, and surprising Castiel was hard to do these days. That’s why Sam and Gabriel were off running an errand and he wasn’t and he was not thinking about that because if nothing else, he was surprising Castiel with _that._

By the time he was done with the piece, he’d shaped it into a sort of shield. He’d seen enough police badges to make it work, and he’d carved their names into the center.

JIMMY

AMELIA

AND

CLAIRE NOVAK

“It looks wonderful,”

“Dammit, Cas!” Dean sighed before waving Castiel in so he could see the shield better, sliding his arm around the angel’s shoulders. Castiel leaned into his embrace, his arms holding Simon easily to his chest and the babe had a hand wound tightly in the curls just below Castiel’s ear.

“You need a haircut,” Dean murmured. “Wait, why is your hair growing?”

“You mentioned that you liked to pull it. I thought such would be easier if it were longer.”

Dean certainly did not whimper at the thought, but he did reach up to slide his hand through the longer locks, giving an experimental tug and nodding approvingly.

“Maybe you don’t need a haircut.”

Dean felt through Castiel’s grace when Sam and Gabriel returned and he shucked off the welding gloves and mask, picking up the piece and meeting his brothers out at the edge of the field. Bobby joined them a minute later, a small bag thrown over his arm.

They’d spent the past week clearing the brush from around a large boulder in the field beyond Bobby’s house. Now Bobby set up a few candles, lighting them in a circle and then stepped back. Gabriel brushed his hand over the rock and created an indentation for the shield Dean had made. Once Dean placed the shield in its place, Gabriel touched the stone again and it sealed itself around the metal, securing the plaque permanently in place.

Castiel joined them for a moment, touching the stone with two fingers and Enochian engraved itself around the edges of the shield. Bobby took four glasses and filled each one with a finger of scotch.

They all moved back, standing in a half circle around the monument and for a moment, they all looked to Castiel. Dean felt the angel struggling to come up with something to say, unable to work around the raw emotions he was still dealing with, and cleared his throat.

“Jimmy was…Jimmy was one of the coolest guys I ever knew. I only got to talk to him a few times, and we never really clicked, but he never hesitated to put foot to ass for his family. Somewhere in the mess we were in, he became part of our family. I watched as he sacrificed more than any man should ever have to, and took it all in stride. Here’s to you, Jimmy. Honorary Winchester.”

He raised his glass and the others raised their glass in unison, drinking solemnly.

They let the candles burn out on their own, Bobby first heading back to the house, and Sam and Gabriel vanished almost silently. Simon fell asleep on Castiel’s shoulder, and still Castiel stood there and Dean wasn’t going to leave him.

“What does the Enochian say?” he asked as the sun began to set.

“’May the Lord bless thee and keep thee while we are absent, one from another.’”

Dean nodded approvingly and after another minute, Castiel let himself be turned and they headed back up to the house, arm in arm.

* * *

Dean looked out through the windshield, glancing down at the directions Jody had given them and then back out to the highway. Castiel was turned nearly completely around in the passenger seat, keeping a careful watch on Simon.

“Cas, he’s fine. I’m not even speeding.”

“I simply don’t understand how the combination of plastic and neoprene fastenings into a ‘car seat’ provides adequate safety. He would be much safer up here with me.” Castiel fretted, leaning back once again to check the car seat Dean had installed.

“I don’t doubt he would,” Dean sighed. “But he has to sit back there, in his car seat. He’s safe, now relax and help me find the turn off.”

Castiel huffed and turned in his seat, staring resolutely forward as Simon gurgled in the back seat. With Castiel’s help, Dean found the dirt road Jody had indicated in her directions and the Impala slid smoothly into the woods. Trees closed in around them, but the path was clear and soon opened into a grassy clearing. An old farmhouse stood in the center, surrounded by a couple barns and a wooden fence. Wildflowers bloomed in the front gardens, the entire house framed by a wraparound porch.

Jody’s police car was parked out front and she waved to them as they pulled in. Castiel was instantly out of the car, drawing Simon back into the safety of his arms. Dean shook his head at his mate’s overprotective nature and walked over to Jody.

“Seems out of our price range.”

Jody shrugged. “It would be, if the DEA hadn’t seized the property in a drug raid a couple months ago. Some punks were running a meth lab out of the little barn over there.”

“Meth?” Dean repeated skeptically.

“It’s clean now,” she assured him. “Besides, you have a holy cleaning crew, don’t you? Look, it needs a lot of TLC, that’s for sure. But it’s three stories, four bedrooms, huge kitchen…and here’s the kicker.”

She pulled a folder out of her car and handed it to him. “That’s a geological survey of the property. There’re veins of rock salt all through the ground around here. One runs right under the house. The cellar walls are caked with it.”

Dean nodded slowly, handing her back the folder. “Can we go inside?”

She handed him a set of keys and waved him on. “Go right ahead. I need to get back to town, but call me and let me know what you think.”

Dean waited until she was gone before taking Castiel’s hand, leading him up the stone path to the front door. It opened easily, and when they stepped inside, Dean took a deep breath. The air was filled with the scents of warm wood, cotton, and apples. Castiel stepped around him to the right, Simon on his hip, and traced the engraving on the stair railing.

“Well?” Dean sat down on the first step after circling the first floor, looking up at Castiel.

“I like it,” Castiel said simply and Dean found himself grinning.

“This is the first one you’ve liked, and I’ve lost count of how many houses we’ve looked at.”

Castiel sat next to him, shifting Simon to his lap. Simon squirmed until Castiel set him down and he pulled himself up onto his own feet, leaning against Castiel’s leg for support.

“I like this place. It feels like a home.”

“Yeah, I like it too.” Dean said softly. “Big kitchen, if you still like cooking. I could turn one of those big barns into a garage. Back away from the road, so it’s private. And we know it’s not haunted, there’s too much salt around. No ghost or demon would get close.”

Castiel leaned against his side as Simon carefully maneuvered his way from Castiel’s lap to Dean’s waiting arms. He gurgled happily when Dean lifted him above his head, and Castiel fished Dean’s cell phone out of his pocket.

“I will call Jody and tell her we want it.”

Dean didn’t argue.

* * *

It took them a little more than two weeks to get the house livable. Castiel and Gabriel worked tirelessly while Dean and Sam camped out in the front yard at night. Simon stayed with Bobby under the condition that this be the last time he babysat for at least six months, but everyone knew Bobby secretly enjoyed spending time with his godson.

One night, Gabriel and Castiel worked together to clear out the nearest barn so Dean had a place to park the Impala. Gabriel even carved out a driveway for the hallowed car.

Dean spent probably a little too much buying a king size bed for the master bedroom, and splurged on silk sheets too, but after a lifetime of coarse motel sheets, he figured he deserved it. Castiel went overboard designing a state of the art kitchen, but Dean didn’t complain after Castiel produced a passable imitation of his mother’s apple pie.

Sam and Gabriel claimed the third story of the house. By the time Gabriel was done, the entire third story was like a separate apartment, complete with its own full kitchen, and wide sweeping glass doors for when they didn’t feel like using the front door.

Simon’s nursery was a collaborative effort, with each of them putting a little something in. Bobby bought them a new crib and brought several of the many things his wife had squirreled away. Jody provided numerous baby clothes and a dresser. Gabriel made Simon a mobile with angel wings and stars.

The first night they all slept in the house together, the four of them stood out on the side porch overlooking the fields and christened the house with a beer. Castiel went inside to check on Simon, and Gabriel claimed a need to stretch his wings, leaving the brothers sitting on the porch steps together.

“Did you ever think we’d be living in an actual house again?” Sam broke the silence after a few minutes and Dean smiled.

“Nope.” He answered honestly. “But I also never thought we’d be hitching up with angels either.”

Sam grinned and raised his bottle. “To battles well fought.”

“And peace well-earned,” Dean returned, clinking his bottle with Sam’s.

“Dean,” Castiel called softly from the door, and Dean stood, finishing off his beer and stretching. He clapped Sam on the shoulder.

“Night, Sammy,”

Sam smiled softly, swirling the last of his beer. “Night, Dean. Night, Cas.”

“Sleep well, Sam,” Castiel said softly.

Sam heard the kitchen door close behind them and smiled up at the night sky, the full moon easily lighting the back yard.

“Home, sweet home,” He whispered, raising his bottle to the moon.

* * *

One car in the drive became two, one apple pie became dozens, Enochian sigils appeared above the doors and windows and along the baseboards, and before anyone thought to even buy a calendar to hang by the door, six months had passed. Simon’s first birthday came and went, and he toddled his first unaided steps across the living room floor into Dean’s waiting arms.

Dean caught Castiel and Gabriel arguing about what color to paint the living room, and he suddenly found himself amazed at how easily they had all slid into the domestic life, two angels and two hunters just living their lives. Dean had finished installing gun safes in the cellar and actually emptied out the Impala’s trunk, organizing all the weaponry into a workable space in the cellar. Bobby shifted some of his library into the cellar as well, but Dean couldn’t remember the last time he’d truly been on a hunt. He surprised himself when he discovered that he simply didn’t have the drive anymore. Sure, if someone called needing help, he’d be there, but he had a family now. That was what mattered now.

Simon was growing like a weed, a crop of dark hair as wild as his father's beginning to spill over his brow. Dean was glad he had a linguist of Castiel's caliber on his side as he worked on learning sign language for the days to come. For now, communicating with Simon was fairly easy and all in facial expressions. Simon would mimic Dean's bright smile, and the baby's first wayward laugh was when Dean lifted him over his head. Dean could never get him to go to sleep, simply because Simon would smile so brightly when he came into the room, and all he wanted was to make Simon smile once more. So it fell to Castiel to soothe the tired babe and put him to bed. 

Sometimes Dean thought of how he would never get to share his love of Led Zeppelin and Metallica with his son, but Castiel was always there to help him sidestep the downsides, and show him Simon's bright smile once more. 

Every night, Dean went to sleep in his own bed, sometimes curled around the angel he loved, and sometimes Castiel would be curled around him. Sometimes Castiel would be draped over his chest, and sometimes they wouldn't really be curled around each other at all, but a messy tangle of limbs and sheets. Sometimes Gabriel and Sam would join them for dinner, but more often than not, the two were off on their extended honeymoon/vacation time. In the morning the sun would rise, and in the evening, it would set.

All was well.

* * *

The wind was blowing in from the north, bringing the promise of snow, and Castiel woke to Dean shivering slightly. He slipped out of bed, pulling an extra blanket out of the closet and spreading it over his mate’s sleeping form.

“Cas…” Dean whispered, reaching out for him, and Castiel brushed a kiss over his cheek.

“I’ll be right back.”

Clad only in a worn pair of Dean’s sweat pants, Castiel headed upstairs to Simon’s nursery. Simon was sleeping soundly and Castiel tucked the babe’s blanket a bit more firmly around him then headed back downstairs. He was about to turn back into his and Dean’s bedroom when a soft whisper of Enochian reached his ears. Castiel turned, his wings ruffling quietly, and listened to the darkness filling the house.

The whisper came again, more insistent, and Castiel followed it out onto the porch. The wind was picking up, but he barely felt the first flakes of snow on his bare chest.

“Who are you?” he called into the rising wind. “What do you want?”

The wind swirled around him, icy and punishing. He stepped down off the porch and out into the yard, lifting his head to the voices calling him.

“Brothers…” he said softly, and the voices began to take shape around him.

There were words in the wind, words of power and of anguish, songs of souls long lost and yet to be lost. Slowly, the words turned to screams, tattered, desperate sounds of pain and torment.

It took Castiel what felt like hours to realize the screams were his own.

* * *

_[End of Part Two]_

_[Part Three will begin October 17, 2012]_


End file.
